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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25040044">Five Evenings at Home</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/countcarmine/pseuds/countcarmine'>countcarmine</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Sex, Domestic, Erotic Thriller, Hand Jobs, Horror, M/M, Masturbation, Mild Pet Play, Mind Control, Murder, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Psychological, Psychological Horror, authority kink, look out it's porn, unreality</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 09:27:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>40,973</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25040044</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/countcarmine/pseuds/countcarmine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cloud spends the week with his...husband? Who is definitely stable and fine and loves him very much. Is all this too good to be true? Probably!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sephiroth/Cloud Strife</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>268</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>411</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Monday, Part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Honey, I'm home!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cloud woke up on the couch. Or <em>a</em> couch, anyway.</p><p>He sat up, looking around the room, and it took over a minute for him to register that he didn’t recognize where this was. That should have made him panic, but then, it wasn’t like he woke up in a hospital or a psych ward. It wasn’t his apartment, but it was a nice place. The couch alone was so comfortable that Cloud didn’t feel like getting up at first and had this soft, blue cover. That alone was fancy as shit, until he noticed the flat screen TV on the wall, which looked like it was streaming-let him check the title-“10 Hour Rain Thunderstorm Sleep Aid Video”…huh.</p><p>There was a coffee table in front of the couch, with a glass top and everything. A fucking coffee table. With actual, coffee table-esque books and magazines on them.</p><p>What the hell. Where <em>was</em> this? The closest place he could come up with was Jessie’s parents’, but that couldn’t have been right. No one was home, except for him. Getting up and leaving the rain noise video on, Cloud wandered through the other rooms, just to be sure. This was probably still in Midgar, at least. Looking out the window made that very clear. If you were plateside, navigation was pretty easy, since everything was centered around Shinra tower. A lot of buildings, mainly employee housing, had to be modular or mass-produced too, so a lot of them ended up looking similar, down to the layouts. Sure enough, he could see other, similar houses outside, and to the left, even miles away, he could clearly see Shinra headquarters.</p><p>The kitchen was fancy and spotless, with what had to be real tile on the floor, and different, higher end kitchen appliances on the counter. The fridge had a water <em>and </em>ice machine too. Cloud was curious about some of the other hardware, but he felt kind of weird, touching other people’s things in a stranger’s house. Tifa was an exception, but then, Tifa didn’t have a stand mixer either. Or a food processor. Or…whatever that black box thing on the counter was. He didn’t want to break anything. There was a door off to the side, but that lead to a cramped laundry room and then the back door, so Cloud moved on, looking for anyone else.</p><p>The bedroom wasn’t as fancy, but it was still intimidating to just walk in there. Everything was clean. Didn’t look like there was a break-in or anything, but Cloud was seriously reaching for any and all reason that he would be here in the first place. He pulled out a couple of dressers to look inside, but they were just full of clothes. No valuables were out. <em>Nothing</em> personal was out, come to think of it. No papers, no binders or files but then, there could have been a study that he didn’t see yet.</p><p>There weren’t any pictures, either, or not that he could see. This was so…</p><p>Actually, it reminded Cloud of those display homes. It wasn’t that weird of a concept; sometimes rich assholes would decorate their homes like this and showcase them when they were on sale and all of them were on that dumb home hunters show. “<em>I’m a chocobo walker.” “And I’m an aesthetician.” “We’re looking to buy a second home in Costa del Sol. Our budget is one million gil.”</em></p><p>But this was a company home in Midgar. Who’s going to buy it? Other Shinra employees? Or maybe they came pre-furnished and no one lived here right now. There was an idea. Maybe they could find other empty homes and get people from the slums to squat in them.</p><p>Oh, wait. That was probably it. He probably had to hide out somewhere and broke into an empty home. Okay, that made a lot more sense.</p><p>To sate his curiosity, Cloud poked at the books in the book shelf and removed one. The book was real, at least. Some book about space. He grazed his finger along the rest of them, knocking them down to the side. So this wasn’t a display, then. He couldn’t really see Shinra putting random books in a house as, like, a complimentary thing.</p><p>So which was it? Did someone live here or not? Someone had to leave the TV on and it definitely wasn’t him. Or maybe it was?</p><p>His skin was starting to crawl.</p><p>Urgh, okay. Cloud tossed the book onto the bed and headed towards the bathroom. Look out, Mystery Person, because if anything was gonna be personal, it was gonna be in the bathroom.</p><p>The first thing that Cloud saw in the bathroom was the mirror, and in that mirror was…well, Cloud, but what he saw jolted him in surprise. He looked…these weren’t his clothes. His gloves were gone. He was wearing a t-shirt and lounge pants. He could overlook not wearing shoes. If he stayed the night, he would have taken them off but. Um. Where.</p><p>Where was the.</p><p>Where’s the Buster Sword?</p><p>It wasn’t there. It wasn’t on his back. It wasn’t. He didn’t see it anywhere else. It was gone. It’s gone. How could he have missed it? It’s gone. The B-</p><p>He didn’t even fall, really. Cloud just took the initiative and lay down, one side of his face on the cool tile floor, because he was going to die here, apparently. His heart was going to explode and his head was going to burst open. It was so quiet, but that made everything worse. The only thing he could hear was his heart, which was about to kill him. Bad. Bad. <em>How</em> could he have lost something so…so…</p><p>The front door opened and Cloud’s stomach dropped. Shit. The Mystery Person was going to find out he (allegedly) broke in. Dammit.</p><p>“I’m home.” The heavy, authoritative voice carried throughout the house, and <em>that</em> made Cloud’s stomach freefall into the Planet’s core. No. Oh no. He froze on the tile floor, like a scared rabbit.</p><p>Sephiroth.</p><p>There was a pause, some shuffling, like he was taking off his shoes, and then-</p><p>“…Hello?” A small pause. “Cloud?”</p><p>
  <em>Shit.</em>
</p><p>He had to…go. He had to get up and…leave. Even if he had to break a window to do it. Or something. Anyway. Cloud scrambled to his feet and his knees knocked together. Too fast. He was getting up too fast, and his brain felt like an elevator suddenly dropping in freefall, and his face met the floor as someone walked into the bedroom.</p><p> </p><p>Someone is rolling him onto his side. Their warm hand is touching his cheek. They’re speaking, but he can’t understand what they’re saying. Their voice is deep and soothing. It reverberates through his body, unclenching his now sore muscles. The hand is gone. Cloud misses its warmth before sinking into unconsciousness again.</p><p> </p><p>Cloud woke up on the bathroom floor, on his side. Someone’s hand was on his shoulder, propping him up, making sure he wasn’t on his back. He could feel the large, looming presence, even when he was staring at the sink cupboard. He was right behind him.</p><p>Sephiroth.</p><p>“…Cloud?” Cloud was still waking up, or his body was at least, and his limbs weren’t working, so he couldn’t get up and get away. Sephiroth was here and he couldn’t defend himself this time. This was it. Sephiroth was doing another hallucination or trick or something and this was how he would die. The other instances where he just let Cloud go or teased him were a cat playing with a mouse before eating it. That’s all it was. This was the final blow and no one was around to help.</p><p>Sephiroth braced his head and shoulders and slowly helped him sit up. He was sitting on the floor as well, and when Cloud was finally up, he leaned against the other man’s chest. He might as well have been leaning against a wall, Sephiroth’s chest was so much wider, but this wall was breathing. He automatically matched his breath, and felt calmer. Maybe that calmness was from knowing that death was certain. Everyone had to make peace with that someday, right?</p><p>Sephiroth’s fingers were in his hair, pressing gently against his scalp and methodically going across his skull bit by bit. This was a strange leadup to murder, but Sephiroth had been fond of mind games for the last…uh. How long <em>had</em> it been since he returned? Cloud was having a hard time remembering.</p><p>“What are you…doing?” It kind of reminded him of when his mom used to check his hair for bugs whenever he’d come back inside the house. This was different, though. It was…eerie.</p><p>“Checking for concussions.” Even though his tone was light, casual even, Sephiroth’s voice could never keep to that, even before his madness. Everything he said had this finality and heaviness to it, as if some ancient and important hero really was living in the modern day, among all the commoners. And here he was, holding Cloud and checking him for injuries. As soon as Cloud could move, instead of getting up, he squirmed and shifted his weight, turning to face Sephiroth and planting his face in his chest instead.</p><p>He smelled like how he used to. Sephiroth always used to use perfumey, girly soaps, which didn’t really fit Cloud’s image of him, but he stopped thinking about that whenever Sephiroth would walk past, or say hello to him in the hallway, or helped him with something and praised him for doing a good job, and he’d smell like flowers while doing it.</p><p>Cloud took a deep breath. He smelled lavender this time and didn’t move. Sephiroth was wearing a dress shirt, but Cloud’s eyes weren’t open; he could feel the fabric on his cheek.</p><p>What was happening?</p><p>“Cloud?”</p><p>“Mmm.” If Sephiroth wasn’t going to do anything, he didn’t want to provoke him. Maybe this was a dream. A weird dream, definitely, but not…uncommon. Especially back when they were in SOLDIER. Even if Cloud hated him now, he did miss the old, kinder Sephiroth. That was easier to admit in his own head, but wouldn’t anyone miss an old friend? It wasn’t that weird. Sephiroth’s fingers pressed against his scalp again.</p><p>“Does anything hurt?” His voice reverberated deep in his chest, and Cloud suddenly wanted to stay there and feel it, like the vibrations coming from a speaker. Yeah, this had to be some kind of dream. The unreality of everything was way too noticeable, and he <em>was</em> tending to go along with what was happening. Even if Sephiroth were involved, dreams aren’t real. They can’t actually hurt you.</p><p>Cloud reached up and tried touching his own face, to see if he caught a bruise after falling face-first, but nothing hurt. Not even a mild bruise. Even his jaw and teeth felt fine. “No…I’m okay.”</p><p>Sephiroth stopped the concussion check, and his hand went to Cloud’s back, stroking him. Soothing him.</p><p>“What happened?” Cloud didn’t want to look at him. If this were a dream, it <em>could </em>turn into a nightmare, easily. He left his face in Sephiroth’s chest, not wanting to look up and see him with rows of fangs, or a twisted, alien face. He just wanted to…not. To pause, or wake up. Instead, he had to talk into the other man’s bosom to answer him.</p><p>“…Panic attack.” That had to have been a panic attack, come of think of it. He felt like he was dying for a minute there.</p><p>“Oh? Did something trigger it?” Cloud wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but it wasn’t anything this…conversational. Sephiroth, the <em>real</em> one, the one tormenting him, would have needled him about it. What a thing to ask, too. Like he didn’t realize that he was the cause of it in the first place.</p><p>Wait. No, there was something else before that. He looked in the mirror…and his clothes were different. Then Sephiroth came home. Then he tried to get up and fainted. That…seemed about right. It was pretty lame to just admit that he panicked about not seeing his regular clothes, though, so Cloud shrugged, still not looking up.</p><p>“…Dunno.”</p><p>“Hmm.” Cloud was bracing for him to pry further, but he didn’t; he just muttered, “Random, then,” which Cloud nodded at. Yes…just your average, random panic attack in the bathroom. Nothing to see here. “…Hey. Cloud.” Sephiroth’s hand took his chin and lifted his face, so he would finally look at him. This was it, he’d see something terrible and have a nightmare, and wake up, and he saw-</p><p>…Well, he saw Sephiroth. Just Sephiroth. His thin, delicate nose, his lips…even his strange, exotic-looking eyes. Everything was “normal”, but it was still disorienting, seeing him smile serenely at Cloud like that. …Not that he wasn’t already doing that before, but the air of malice was gone. It was like before, like when he first saw him in the papers. When he saw him in real life, during their SOLDIER days. When he first saw Sephiroth’s face and liked that he was pretty like a girl but was stronger than any man alive. That was the thing that stuck out to him most. Puberty was a…weird, confusing time.</p><p>Sephiroth took his finger and pressed it against Cloud’s nose. “Boop.” Cloud shook his head like a confused dog. Did…</p><p>“Did you just…boop me?”</p><p>Sephiroth gave a light smile and did it again. “Boop.”</p><p>“Stop.” Cloud grabbed his hand to get him to stop and felt something hard and metallic. He brought it a little closer, only to find a ring on one of Sephiroth’s fingers. Just a normal, gold-plated band. Huh.</p><p>Cloud couldn’t stop staring at it. Where was this going?</p><p>“Cloud.”</p><p>“Huh?” Cloud turned, only for Sephiroth to pinch his nose, then hold his thumb in between his fingers and wave it in front of his face. Like he just discovered the concept of “Got Your Nose”.</p><p>“Uh oh, Cloud.” Cloud smacked his hand away while the other man just laughed; a normal, not unhinged laugh. Okay, never mind about the needling being gone because it was back. Much less mean, though, but still annoying.</p><p>“I’m not a baby, cut it out.” That came out of his mouth as if they had this conversation before, which they definitely haven’t, but in his defense, that <em>was </em>how dreams worked.</p><p>“Ohhh? You’re not a baby?”</p><p>“No!”</p><p>“Hm hm…then explain <em>this</em>.” In one swift motion, Sephiroth scooped him up and stood, holding him like a newborn baby. He displayed Cloud in front of the mirror like some people did to annoy their pets specifically. That wasn’t hard for Sephiroth. Picking up Cloud for him was probably the same as a normal person picking up a cat. Sephiroth looked at the mirror, then back at Cloud with an easy smile. Even before…everything, Sephiroth hardly ever smiled.</p><p>“Look! You’re getting so big.”</p><p>Sephiroth’s hair was still long, silver, and beautiful, flowing down his back and down the sides of his face. This was a mistake on his part because Cloud grabbed one of his bangs and pulled down, hard.</p><p>“Ah, okay, okay, I get it.” Just as fast, he gently set Cloud on his feet, stabilizing him to make sure he didn’t fall over. Smoothing out his clothes. It was all very delicate handling, coming from a man who could easily crush the average person and knew it. Maybe that was where the delicacy came from.</p><p>“Are you feeling better?” Cloud looked straight ahead, at their reflections in the mirror, and had a hard time answering. For one, Sephiroth looked a little ridiculous. He had a light blue dress shirt on and slacks. It was like taking a professional athlete and putting him into an accounting job. It just didn’t mesh. As for Cloud…</p><p>Cloud didn’t look so good. There were bags under his eyes and he looked pale, like he was sick. Or it could have been the bright light of the bathroom just making him look worse but either way, it was alarming to look at. His heart felt like it was working overtime to keep him standing, too. He moved his head to the side and it made him feel a little dizzy. Maybe he <em>was</em> getting sick. Instead of brushing off the question like normal, though, he shook his head. Sephiroth felt his forehead with the back of his hand.</p><p>Despite everything, Cloud found himself leaning into it.</p><p>“…Hmm, no fever.” Sephiroth pulled his hand away and left Cloud feeling a bit stupid. What was he <em>doing?</em> If he knew that this was a dream, he’d be able to act on his own, right? That’s how lucid dreams were supposed to work.</p><p>Sephiroth kissed the back of his head and ruffled his hair, making Cloud’s stomach jumble into knots. Oh God. Where was this <em>going?</em></p><p>“I’ll go ahead and start dinner.” Sephiroth started to leave, but Cloud’s legs suddenly didn’t want to work for completely unrelated reasons and he stumbled forward while the other man caught him, effortlessly.</p><p>As Sephiroth helped Cloud brace himself and take some steps forward, he said, “Maybe you shouldn’t fall asleep for a few hours. Just in case.”</p><p>Cloud said nothing. He could only stare at one of his hands, where there was a plain, silver ring on one of his fingers.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ᕗ</p><p>I'm sorry that there's no actual Sex yet, but in my defense, patience is a virtue, b!tch. Let it ride and see what happens.</p><p>More to come, lol</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Monday, Part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>As soon as he was ready, he took a deep breath, jumped up and stabbed downward, letting gravity help him.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cloud was sitting on the couch and trying to watch TV. And failing.</p><p>He flipped around for a little bit, just in order to stay in the living room and do something. Here, wouldn’t you know it, that dumb house hunters show; there, an old rerun of a Stamp cartoon. He couldn’t really focus, so he settled on a music channel.</p><p>In his defense, it was a little hard to pick something while Sephiroth was in the other room. Just…there. Like he didn’t single-handedly ruin Cloud’s life without even trying. Cooking food. Like a normal person who was supposed to be alive and not extremely dead.</p><p>Cloud couldn’t even be angry at him because this wasn’t real. Whether or not it was a dream, and at this point it was running a little <em>too</em> long to be a dream, this couldn’t actually be Sephiroth. It was…he wasn’t sure. Some idealized version, maybe? He was acting much more like how Cloud remembered him, back in the day. Except happier. Someone else wearing Sephiroth’s skin. That had to be it. But to what end?</p><p>He couldn’t stop messing with his ring, either. He kept fidgeting with it, turning it in circles. Cloud didn’t want to take it off, if only to not raise any suspicions. Whoever “Sephiroth” actually was, they probably thought he was having a psychotic break. When they were heading to the living room, Cloud was trying to ask, “Why are you dressed like that?” but he was also thinking of saying, “You look like an office worker,” and so, “Why are you an office worker?” came tumbling out of his mouth.</p><p>Sephiroth smiled at him, but his face was unreadable. It was like his eyes forgot to smile along with his mouth. “You’re so funny,” he said under his breath, and kissed his forehead, and helped him to the couch so he could get dinner ready.</p><p>The implications of everything, about all of this, were not what he wanted to think about right now.</p><p>Cloud took a glass of ice that was slowly turning into a glass of water, dumped a chunk of ice into his mouth, and started chewing. “Sephiroth” said it would help keep him awake, and to his credit, it was working. It helped Cloud to stay in the moment too, in the here and now, which was what he needed at the moment. He still didn’t feel all that good, and his muscles ached. But at least the ice helped him think, and he might as well try to think through this to get it out of the way.</p><p>Okay.</p><p><em>What</em> the fuck.</p><p>If Cloud was to try and understand what was happening, he needed to get all of this straight in his head, but without making Sephiroth suspicious. Right.</p><p>Cloud was in a home for Shinra employees. “Sephiroth” had just come home from “work”, implying that he was a Shinra employee. Which was technically true, but…not like this. Sephiroth was also acting like Cloud was supposed to be here. That he lived here. And the…the rings.</p><p>The rings implied that they were, ah. M. Mah-uh. M-Married? Like husband and wife? Or…husband and husband, he guessed. Like one of those older family sitcoms, but gay? The rings even matched, too. Silver and gold, and they clearly exchanged them. That was so…corny. Cloud was cringing just thinking about it. Yuck. Who’s idea was that, anyway? If that was the…other-him or whatever the fuck’s idea, he was obligated to shove him into a locker.</p><p>Okay, okay. If they were married, was Cloud supposed to be the “wife”? Or, at least, the one who minded the house? If this were like a sitcom, then maybe. But in real life, if one member of a couple was working for Shinra, the other was too. That’s how it usually was; couples tended to meet each other at work, or have similar jobs, at least in Midgar. You couldn’t really afford to have just one income if you worked in middle management.</p><p>Sephiroth didn’t seem to expect him to do “wife activities” either, although Cloud was unconscious on the bathroom floor so, you know. Probably wasn’t going to get any cooking done like that. Or maybe Sephiroth already knew that he didn’t cook. He wondered if the other him were the same. Assuming there <em>was </em>another him, which was looking like less of a possibility the more time passed. Less likely to be a dream too.</p><p>Cloud looked into the kitchen to see what Sephiroth was doing. There wasn’t a door between the two rooms or anything, so he could see him pretty clearly. He put some rice on and was getting something from the cupboard. He had his hair tied back and everything.</p><p>“Is soup okay?”</p><p>Hearing Sephiroth ask that in such a casual way caused his brain to slow down and gum up. It was like trying to shift gears from low to high with no stops in between. Cloud was having a hard time catching up, and he hesitated. “I…sure…”</p><p>“Miso?”</p><p>“Mmn.” He nodded and got another chunk of ice to chew on.</p><p>This was all so fucking surreal. Cloud was stuck in someone’s house and Sephiroth was feeding him. If this was all an act, he’d probably poison the food.</p><p>…No. Sephiroth didn’t use poison for the same reason he didn’t like guns: he didn’t need them. If this <em>was</em> Sephiroth, for real, and he was trying to kill Cloud, he would have done it by now. He could have done that before…whatever <em>this</em> was. Why here? Why now? If he was going to get answers, he should do it while trying to be cool about it. Like, bring up some questions that would normally be asked. All casual-like.</p><p>“So…” Cloud started, trying to think of a neutral-ish question to ask. “How…was work?” As an afterthought, he added, “…Dear.” If they were “married”, he should probably talk like it.</p><p>Sephiroth turned and raised a confused eyebrow at him, like he just said something in a completely different language.</p><p>“<em>Dear?</em>” Oh, well. Maybe other-him wasn’t that cringeworthy after all. Thank God.</p><p>“Uh, how was work…today?” Cloud asked a little louder, to pass off that Sephiroth probably misheard the pet-name. Sephiroth narrowed his eyes, studying him, before going back to the soup.</p><p>“Fine. Everyone’s been getting on Reeve’s case lately, so it was a little hectic. I had to do a lot of mediating.” Reeve… Weird, Cloud felt like that name was familiar, but he couldn’t place it.</p><p>“Who’s Reeve again?”</p><p>“Head of Public Works.” Right, okay. He still couldn’t put a face to the name, but he probably ran into him in the past. Cloud nodded, as if he knew what any of the rest of what Sephiroth said meant.</p><p>“Cool, cool. That, uh…sucks?” He winced immediately after saying that. Good job! Very convincing of him. Thankfully, Sephiroth laughed it off and started dishing up the soup. That was the nice thing about miso; it was pretty fast to throw together, if you had everything. By the time he was done being embarrassed about it, Sephiroth was handing him his bowl. Cloud took it a little sheepishly, kind of surprised that he wasn’t expected to eat at the table. He still didn’t feel like getting up either, but it was surprising that Sephiroth could tell. When he looked up at him, at Sephiroth leaning over him against the couch, the other man smiled back. Now that Cloud was looking at him properly, it was easier to tell what was so off about his face; he was smiling at him but the eyes looked sad, or like they were looking at something else.</p><p>Sephiroth pet Cloud’s head, running his fingers through his hair and giving his scalp and ears scritches, and it would be humiliating if it didn’t almost make him drop his bowl in surprise. His heart stuttered.</p><p>“You don’t have to force yourself. It’s okay.” Sephiroth said that as softly as he could, making Cloud give him another look. That was a little…ominous.</p><p>“…Force myself?” He couldn’t think of a better way to ask that. It was more to fill in a blank space in a conversation, saying something for the sake of saying something. It did kind of bother him, though, the way Sephiroth said that. Cloud took a sip of his soup, paused, then took another, longer one. This was…good! Not fine dining, but easy to tell that it wasn’t the instant stuff. Weird how even miso soup could taste better plateside. Must be the water.</p><p>“To remember.” Sephiroth took his hand off of him, which, somehow, made Cloud feel a little worse, although Sephiroth <em>was </em>acting really cagey about this. And he…liked…the petting. A little. That was still a vague answer, though, so he prodded some more.</p><p>“Remember what?” He drank some more of his soup while Sephiroth shrugged, leaning and slouching against a lounge chair. Cloud remembered him doing that a lot. It always seemed like he tried to make himself shorter so he could be at eye level with everyone else. Like a cooler, less patronizing version of when taller people crouched down to look at you. He spread out one his arms, gesturing at the general area.</p><p>“This. Us.” Sephiroth paused, and fiddled with his ring, like he was getting uncomfortable. Weird. Did he already know that this wasn’t right? If he knew that Cloud didn’t know what was happening, then Cloud was lucky that he was acting so calm about it. Or, maybe not calm. More like this was already common. At least he could get more information out of him without being too suspicious.</p><p>“So…I have memory problems?” He didn’t really, but for the sake of whatever narrative Sephiroth was going for, he’d go along with it.</p><p>“…Yes. Not all the time, but little episodes now and again. It’ll pass.” Sephiroth nodded, more to himself than to Cloud, then got up to take Cloud’s bowl. “More?”</p><p>Cloud shook his head. “I can finish it.” And he did, or try to, while Sephiroth went into the kitchen to whip something up for himself. He swallowed the bits of tofu that were left and sat there, thinking.</p><p>So. The other him had brain problems, huh? That sounded kind of sad, if a little dramatic. It sounded like a plot point in one of those overwrought TV dramas. Maybe there’ll be a bracing, thrilling conclusion where we find out that Cloud has a terminal illness, or that him and Sephiroth were secretly siblings. What’s going to happen next season? Hah.</p><p>Now that he thought about it, it did kind of explain why “he” was home. Maybe the other him couldn’t work? That would explain why Sephiroth was acting like such a caretaker. You know…maybe he could use that to his advantage? Get more information out of him because he was so willing to give it. Play dumb until he figured out what was actually going on. Sure. Cloud could do that, easy. No problem.</p><p>When Sephiroth came back with his dinner (an omelet with rice and soup), he brought a throw blanket along, and when he set his meal down, he unfurled it and put it around Cloud’s shoulders while checking his forehead again. “Still no fever. That’s good,” he muttered, patting Cloud’s shoulder and turning to get started on his own food.</p><p>“You know, you’re doing much better than usual. You always get so scared of me when you’re like this.”</p><p>“Ah, hahaaa.” Cloud wanted to say something not very appropriate to the situation but bit his tongue, nervously laughing. Scared, huh? Gosh. You don’t say. “Um. Do panic attacks happen a lot?”</p><p>“Mmn.” Sephiroth nodded, taking a sip of some of his soup. “I have to keep you inside like a cat to make sure you don’t run off! A car could run you over, you know.” The breezy smile and laugh made that seem like a joke, or Cloud hoped it was? Please be kidding. “I’ll bet that’s what happened. You probably didn’t know where you were and panicked.”</p><p>Cloud nodded along because, really, that was kind of close to what actually brought it on, but it sounded less stupid than “unfamiliar clothes” so he let it go. “Yeah, it was…really scary.” Play it up. Play up needing him. Whatever this imposter’s game was, he clearly liked being needed. It’ll make him talk more, hopefully. Then he could find out what his real deal was.</p><p>Sephiroth reached out and touched his hand, holding it. Cloud looked down at it in mild surprise.</p><p>“That’s still progress, don’t you think?” Sephiroth’s voice cracked a little, which made Cloud snap his head up to look at him. While Sephiroth was never a wide smiler, a small smile was on his face, and he stared at Cloud as if just looking at him could sustain him for the rest of time. He looked at him like how sunflowers looked at the sun.</p><p>“I’m so proud of you. Your recovery was remarkable. Do you know that? You’re doing so well.” He interlocked his fingers with Cloud’s, looking away a little and smiling wider, as if deliriously happy.</p><p>Cloud dropped his bowl. That wasn’t as dramatic as it sounded. It was already right next to his lap, so it just sort plopped into it. He desperately needed to ask what all of that meant (recovery from what? <em>recovery from what?</em>) but seeing Sephiroth…look at him like that.</p><p>And <em>say</em> that.</p><p>And hold his h-. His. His h-</p><p>Cloud made a noise that sounded a lot like, “Mmmmnghn,” and felt like he was on fire. Sephiroth laughed at that and that made everything worse.</p><p>“Haha, you’re blushing.”</p><p>“Sh-shut. You. Can’t just say that-“</p><p>“Oh? I can’t tell you how lucky I am?” Whoever this was, he still had the same flair for dramatics as Sephiroth because he swept Cloud into his arms, onto his lap, and put his mouth right against Cloud’s ear, whispering.</p><p>“Is this ‘cringe’, Cloud? Am I being ‘cringe’?” God damn him. Even saying something that stupid made his skin prickle and he actually kind of <em>liked</em> it. Ugh. Cloud punched him in the ribs and, because it was Sephiroth, it of course did nothing except make him laugh. He picked Cloud up and had him in the baby hold again, as revenge.</p><p>“Is it cringe to say that you love your husband very much?”</p><p>“Fuck off.” Cloud squirmed out of his grip like a belligerent cat, sliding onto the other side of the couch and picking up his bowl.</p><p>“More soup.”</p><p>Sephiroth gave a serene smile but didn’t take the bowl. “Cloud, what do we say?”</p><p>Before he could stop himself, he said, “More soup, please,” almost automatically. Before he could recover from his embarrassment, Sephiroth took his bowl and said, “Good job,” kissing his forehead. It made him feel warm and pleasant. He was going to ask something, but he forgot what the question was.</p><p>Well, if he forgot, it probably wasn’t that important, right?</p><p>By the time they finished dinner, Cloud was feeling a little better. His light-headedness was gone, and he was even able to stomach some rice, so he was probably just hungry. There was no telling how long he’s been in here because Sephiroth wouldn’t have given the correct answer, and he couldn’t remember much before that. That should have been more worrying, but his brain felt so tired. This whole evening felt like a whole week and he just wanted to get some rest. He’d figure things out in the morning.</p><p>They watched a movie together, too. Some old black-and-white drama that’s been shown on TV for awhile now. Cloud wasn’t paying all that much attention, to be honest. They started out sitting a couple of feet apart and just kind of gravitated together as the movie continued, until he was in Sephiroth’s lap, leaning against him. Sephiroth was absentmindedly playing with his hair, which he wanted to hate but couldn’t think of a reason to. He could feel Sephiroth’s chest rising and falling, slowly, and he automatically matched his breathing. Cloud felt drunk, but it was the light, buzzed kind of drunk, where nothing could bother you much, and everything felt slow and nice.</p><p>He hasn’t felt like that in years. Of course, he could just be really tired, but he was much more relaxed than he had any right to be.</p><p>When the credits rolled, Sephiroth shifted his weight, pulling Cloud into a hug. Cloud didn’t pull away, even when the other man whispered to him.</p><p>“Guess what.” Sephiroth kissed his cheek. Cloud could feel his hot breath on his skin, and leaned into him.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“It’s bed time.” Sephiroth kissed his cheek again, and Cloud turned to face him.</p><p>“Oh, yeah?” Bed time, huh? Cloud studied the easy smile, and his beautiful eyes. His perfect skin. His lips. His soft-looking lips. How could this be the same man who…who what?</p><p>He leaned closer, climbing on top of Sephiroth, straddling him. His lips. Sephiroth let him lie there, his breath making Cloud rise up, down. Up, down. He was so pretty. Cloud leaned in to kiss him. He felt a strange pressure, and realized that he was getting a hard-on. Sephiroth put his arms around him, his hands going down his back, over the curve of his spine, stopping as his ass. He squeezed it, pushing Cloud into him, and Cloud could feel the other man’s hardness too. He moaned into Sephiroth's chest.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>
  <em>Oh shit.</em>
</p><p>The realness of it snapped Cloud out of it so hard that it felt like a softball clocked him in the head at twenty miles an hour. He launched away from Sephiroth like a startled cat and landed on the other side of the couch. What was happening? He looked down and noticed that his dick was still hard, and sticking out of the flap in his pants. Cloud hurriedly crossed his legs and brought down both his arms. He couldn’t look at Sephiroth. He was five seconds away from dying of embarrassment.</p><p>“Bah, bed? Bedtime?” He couldn’t think of anything else to say, so he was rambling. His body was thrumming just from how hard his heart was beating. What the <em>fuck</em> was happening?</p><p>“Y-Yes, bedtime.” To his credit, Sephiroth gave him space and didn’t try to touch him, he just sat there and waited. “Are you all right?”</p><p>“Yeah, um.” Cloud pointed in the general direction of the bedroom, still unable to look at him. “Like, in there?”</p><p>“…Usually, yes.” There was only one bed in there. Only one bed.</p><p>Only one bed, with Sephiroth. In the same bed, with Sephiroth. Touching Sephiroth. Holding Sephiroth. Kissing Sephiroth. Licking Sephiroth. Sucking-</p><p>No. <em>No.</em> Cloud took a deep, cleansing breath and forced himself to look at the other man, whose muscles were huge and rippling, and whose cock he just learned a minute ago felt very. Um. Haaahhhhh.</p><p>He should try that again.</p><p>“C-can I-“ Cloud sounded breathless, didn’t he? Fuck. “Can I sleep on the couch, please?”</p><p>Sephiroth titled his head to the side, probably confused, but he nodded. He even had the grace to not look or sound disappointed. “Of course. I’ll go get your things.” Sephiroth stood up and gathered the dishes, ruffling Cloud’s hair in a playful, non-sexual way. Cloud tried and failed to not look at the now very prominent bulge in the other man’s pants. He tried to will his boner away, bundling up in the blanket.</p><p>It turned out that his “things” were a pillow and toothbrush (<em>his</em> pillow and toothbrush) and that there was a room he missed, the guest bathroom, along with an office. Okay.</p><p>As soon as Sephiroth was asleep, he’d get out of here and try to figure out what was going on. He felt a little silly brushing his teeth, but he didn’t want to give away that anything else was wrong, except it being another “episode”, according to Sephiroth. Brush his teeth. Wash his face. Go to the couch with the pillow and blanket. Let Sephiroth tuck him in because he insisted. Pretend to sleep. Great. Wait an hour just to be safe, and then leave. He could do this.</p><p>Cloud yawned, leaning back onto his pillow. Resting his eyes wouldn’t hurt. Just for five minutes.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t know where he is, and it’s dark, but he’s surrounded by…something. He isn’t sure what. They feel soft and warm. Almost like arms but without the bones. They wrap around him like tentacles, but they aren’t wet or gross at all. They’re warm and velvety. He’s being held, cradled. Swaddled. He feels safe and happy. It’s like that feeling, when you just wake up, and you’re warm in bed, and you don’t want to leave. You never want to leave. Like that.</p><p>One of them wraps itself around his head, covering his eyes, which is just as well because he can’t see in the darkness anyway. He doesn’t need to. It’s a comforting gesture too, like a hug. He can feel its muscles ripple along its body. It speaks to him, in speech beyond words.</p><p>
  <em>Will you empty yourself and be reborn?</em>
</p><p>Yes. He nods. Everyone else around him vibrates in excitement. In celebration. He can feel their excitement all along his body, all through it. They’re so happy for him.</p><p>He’s happy too. He’s finally home. Finally-</p><p> </p><p>Cloud woke up on the couch, in a sudden start. There was a digital clock in the living room, and it could easily be seen in the dark, as a sort of makeshift night light. It was 12:05 AM. What was…what was that? A dream? Whatever that was, the contents of it melted away, leaving him with only an impending sense of dread.</p><p>He fell asleep, but he didn’t sleep through the whole night. That was good. At least he could leave before morning. He wasn’t even going to bother to get his shoes, wherever they were. He didn’t care. He <em>had</em> to go. If he just had a dream, then what the fuck was all this supposed to be? Where <em>was</em> this? Why was he here? And who is the man claiming to be his “husband”? It couldn’t actually be Sephiroth, right?</p><p>Cloud didn’t want to stick around long enough to find out. Throwing off the covers, he got up and crept over to the door, slowly. He needed to make sure Sephiroth didn’t hear him, but it sounded like the fan was on in the other room. He should be okay. It’ll be fine.</p><p>He turned the door knob, opened the door, and stepped out to-</p><p>Cloud woke up on the couch, confused.</p><p>The confusion grew worse the longer he sat there, going over what had just happened. Unlike the other dream, he definitely remembered getting up and going to the door. What…</p><p>He looked up at the clock again. It was 12:05 AM.</p><p>The dread settled into his stomach like wet concrete.</p><p>Okay. Cloud took a deep breath and slapped himself in the face, hard. No time to think about what that was. He had to <em>go</em>. He had to get back to the Sector 7 slums. Tifa was probably getting worried. That’s where he was last time, he was pretty sure.</p><p>All right. Getting up and thumping his chest to psych himself up, Cloud walked to the door, opened it and</p><p>Cloud woke up on the couch and ah, son of a bitch.</p><p>He sat there in a confused daze. He looked up at the clock, too. 12:05 AM. Time wasn’t passing. Was he just…going crazy?</p><p>Cloud turned and looked into the bedroom doorway. It was open and he could hear the fan clearly.</p><p>No.</p><p>Sephiroth was doing this.</p><p>He had to be. And if he was, then this was the <em>real </em>Sephiroth. For reasons <em>way beyond</em> Cloud’s understanding, Sephiroth was…what? This was different than the other times he was being fucked with. It was like he trying a different tactic this time. But to what end? Just to fuck with him?</p><p>Well, probably. Sephiroth tried every other way to torment him, so Cloud wouldn’t put to past him to seduce him as some elaborate prank. And he almost fell for it. He’s so <em>stupid.</em> He’s so…</p><p>Cloud had to kill him. Something wasn’t letting him leave, and that something was probably Sephiroth. Even if he used to idolize him, that ship sailed years ago. It was shattered when his idol burned down Nibelheim. It was stained when he killed his family and friends. He almost killed<em> Tifa. </em>And he thought he could just swoop in and act like it didn’t happen!? Just because he lost!?</p><p><em>Fuck him!</em> God!</p><p>Cloud’s blood was boiling. He was filled with a righteous anger at the whole thing. At everything. It ends tonight. He had to kill Sephiroth and he had to do it now. It wasn’t a fair fight, but he was weaponless and Sephiroth didn’t deserve a fair fight because fuck him. Fuck him. Sephiroth fed him and held him and called him his husband, and for what?</p><p>Cloud had to fight the urge to kick something and wake him up. He had to save that energy. Even if he did kill him, it wasn’t a guarantee that he’d stay dead, so he had to make it quick and then run for it. He walked into the kitchen and, careful to not turn on the light, managed to find a big kitchen knife on the magnetic knife holder thing. Perfect. He’d have to put all his weight behind it, but he <em>was</em> in SOLDIER. The aim had to be perfect. Pierce his heart. Then run.</p><p>Taking the knife, Cloud carefully walked to the bedroom, slipping through the door and trying to move it as little as possible, so it didn’t make a noise. Sephiroth was still there, sleeping. Allegedly. He could always be faking it. At this point, Cloud wasn’t completely sure if he needed to sleep in the first place. There was a standing fan blowing on him from the left, next to the night stand. It was making plenty of white noise, so he should be lucky that Sephiroth needs a fan to sleep. Okay.</p><p>Deep breath. Here we go.</p><p>Cloud walked over to the right of the bed, knife held behind him, just in case Sephiroth woke up. He didn’t, though. He slept peacefully on his side, facing away, silver hair shining in the light from the window.</p><p>This could be fake. He could be faking being sleep. You never knew. He could probably disappear and then reappear behind him. Sephiroth could do anything, but that wouldn’t matter when he’s finally dead.</p><p>Gently, Cloud reached out and pulled on Sephiroth’s shoulder, so he’d lay on his back. It worked, to his shock. Sephiroth rolled over onto his back, hair splayed out behind him. Cloud lowered the blanket, only to find that the other man was shirtless.</p><p>This was getting a little too easy, but Cloud didn’t have the time or patience to get suspicious. He had to end this. He had to <em>go.</em> So Sephiroth had to die. Sorry.</p><p>Once he found the place he figured the heart should be, he grasped the knife in both hands, making sure the tip was on the exact spot. It needed to be perfect. He had to get past the bone for it to work. As soon as he was ready, he took a deep breath, jumped up and stabbed downward, letting gravity help him.</p><p>It pierced him. There was a crunch of broken bone and a squish of flesh. It wasn’t nearly as dramatic as in the movies, and blood was slowly leaking out around the knife, but Sephiroth jolted awake, obviously. Most people would, if they were in the middle of being stabbed. He sat up, his breathing labored and the knife sticking out of his chest, and he stared at Cloud, wild-eyed. Confused.</p><p>“What-“ He did not have time to finish that sentence because Cloud grabbed the hilt of the knife, put his foot against his chest, and pulled. Blood came pouring out while Sephiroth sat there, staring at Cloud stupidly, absently using his hands to try to push the blood back in. It didn’t work. He lay back down as if to go to sleep, and stopped breathing, and died. With all his blood gone, he looked like a frail, sad ghost in the moonlight.</p><p>Cloud dropped the knife, head buzzing from adrenaline. No time to waste. Sephiroth wouldn’t let himself die this easily, so he had to bail. He had blood on his hands, literally, but there wasn’t any time, he had to leave. Making much less of an effort to be quiet, Cloud stumbled out of the bedroom, into the living room and to the door. He opened it and</p><p>Cloud woke up on the couch.</p><p>He lay there for quite some time, staring up at the clock. It was 12:05 AM when he woke up. He lay there, staring at the minutes going past, until it was 12:10. Finally, he took a deep breath, hoisted himself up, and sat there.</p><p>“…Heh.”</p><p>His head was still buzzing. It felt like it was full of angry bees, but his heart felt oddly serene. He briefly wondered if this is what it felt like for Sephiroth when he finally snapped. He wondered if that was the point. Unfortunately, Sephiroth didn’t understand that this only made Cloud angrier. A level beyond angry. He was so furious that all of his emotions burnt up, and there was only a calm void. He was leaving, and not even Sephiroth could stop him.</p><p>Stumbling to his feet, Cloud shuffled over to the kitchen to find the knife. He took it, then stumbled into the bedroom, opening the door much less carefully. He had a hard time feeling his body. He felt like he was floating, like he was suddenly drunk.</p><p>Sephiroth moved a bit. Cloud stopped, but the other man ended up rolling over, settling into sleep again. Cloud walked forward, stopping at the right side of the bed, where Sephiroth was. Alive, obviously.</p><p>Cloud stood there for a long time. It could have been minutes. It could have been hours. But he stood there, staring for awhile, before he took the blanket and moved it. Sephiroth was wearing underwear and nothing else.</p><p>The buzzing got louder. He could feel his head, feeling like how TV static looks, until the buzzing became a hum, and the humming became one long tone. His body felt electrified. He stood there like an idiot, letting it wash over him and taking it in. You would think the tone would be annoying, but it wasn’t. It was pleasant. It kept going, and he wanted it to keep going, forever.</p><p>Cloud was barely able to focus his eyes, until he looked down at Sephiroth, and then he couldn’t stop focusing. He stared, drinking him in. The room became brighter, just so he could see Sephiroth’s beautiful face even better. How wonderful.</p><p>He dropped the knife and didn’t even hear it land. Sephiroth didn’t move either, He was sleeping peacefully. That was good. He didn’t want to wake him. He deserved his rest.</p><p>Cloud reached down and touched himself, realizing that he was hard again. He smiled. He gave it a good grip and tugged, and the tone got louder. His whole body shook with excitement. He did it again, and again, and the tone became so loud that he stopped thinking, at least in words. There were only pictures, and they were all of Sephiroth. Of course they were. Of course.</p><p>He stood over his perfect lover and keep going, kept stroking himself, and thinking about Sephiroth’s massive cock in his mouth, of feeling the man’s hardness against his own. His feet were burning. Moans kept coming out, and he kept trying to stifle them. He didn’t want to wake him. He wanted to look at Sephiroth. Burn him into his mind, just like this, forever. He wanted to fuck him so bad, but not now. Not now.</p><p>The tone was so loud it stopped being perceivable. It became him. It hummed along his body, and his body hummed with it. He went faster, furiously, thrusting along. He wanted to dissolve into the sound itself, to become one with it. His legs buckled and his muscles were spasming. He lurched forward, trying not to fall, and rode that final wave, cumming onto Sephiroth’s chest.</p><p>The tone was still there, but quiet now. It hummed within him, like pleasant background noise this time. It comforted him. He looked at his hand blankly, staring at what little cum was on it, and licked it off as casual as anything, almost automatically, barely tasting it, much less caring. He then stared at his handiwork, a vacant smile on his face.</p><p>Cloud knelt, as if he were at an altar, and started licking Sephiroth clean. He didn’t wake up, but he could feel Sephiroth’s muscles ripple and twitch under his tongue, and was filled with such excitement and pleasure that he came again. He was meticulous, and didn’t stop until everything was gone.</p><p>The humming cradled his mind and he was suddenly very tired, but he still knelt there, resting his head on the edge of the bed, so he could keep looking at Sephiroth, and stayed there until he drifted off into sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello. I've been possessed by a demon that made me write this. Now I'm going to pass out until morning.</p><p>If you like this, and a lot of you apparently do, please let me know in the comments or give kudos. I have no idea what I'm doing and would like to know what I'm doing right, so comments would be great. I love them! You are literally not bothering me if you give me some.</p><p>If you want more, please check out my other work, which is less horny but better written (in my opinion). And let me know what you think of that too! Thanks again!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Tuesday</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“…Sephiroth.”</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>Cloud hesitated, trying to think of the clearest way to ask this.</p><p>“What did I recover from?”</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cloud woke up in bed.</p><p>It wasn’t the bed in his apartment, which was pretty bare bones and in the middle of an apartment that was just a room and a bath. There wasn’t the rotten egg smell that was common in the Slums either. It smelled like rose and vanilla, and the bed and blankets were way too soft. He didn’t get up for awhile. He stared out the window, at the sunlight starting to come in through the curtains. Sephiroth wasn’t in bed.</p><p>Wait. That’s right, Sephiroth-</p><p>When did Cloud-</p><p>He sat up, head still murky from half-sleep, and looked down in his lap, bleary-eyed. There was the throw blanket, from the couch, on top of the main one. Gummed up gears started to turn in his mind when he turned and saw “his” pillow was back here. Cloud rubbed the tiredness and gunk out of his eyes. That’s strange. When did he come back in here? He could hear noises coming from the kitchen and smell the faint scent of coffee, but he laid back down to think.</p><p>Cloud was out in the living room and he was going to do…something. No, he was gonna bail, that’s right. Then he accidentally fell asleep and then woke up from some kind of nightmare. Then he…hmm.</p><p>Then, he went into the bedroom and…here he was. He just…woke up here.</p><p>Cloud rolled over to the other side of the bed and planted his face on the pillow, trying to think. It, of course, smelled like <em>his</em> shampoo. God.</p><p>The guy goes missing for five years and he was right here this whole time. It didn’t make any sense! And Cloud <em>still</em> couldn’t remember how he got here. Acting like they’re married…don’t make him laugh. This whole thing felt like a really elaborate prank. Any minute now, someone’s gonna pop out of the closet with a camera and say, “Guess what? You’ve just been Prank’d!” or whatever. Confetti would fall from the ceiling. They’d take a picture with the actor who was a doing an admittedly pitch-perfect performance of Sephiroth and they’d pay Cloud like a thousand gil for compensation. Well, the gil part wouldn’t be that bad. At least he wouldn’t have embarrassed himself for free.</p><p>He took a deep breath from the pillow and sighed. Any minute now, the camera man would pop out and it would be over and he could go home. …Any time.</p><p>…Ready when you are, camera guy.</p><p>…His dick was starting to hurt.</p><p>Groaning in annoyance, Cloud rolled over onto his back. He was hard again.</p><p>“Tch, cut it out.” He sat up and tucked it into his pants (were these lounge pants always black, or was he not paying attention?) and stretched. The more he woke up, the more he realized he needed to piss as well, so he should probably get out of bed for real.</p><p>As Cloud wandered over to the bathroom, his eye caught a framed picture on the bookshelf. It had writing on it, and as he came closer he realized what it was: one of those postcard photos you get at touristy places. This one said, “Costa del Sol” in a weird font and had a shot of the beach at sunset. …Pretty nice. He’d never been there himself, except for passing through the port in order to get to Midgar, but that didn’t really count.</p><p>Except him and Sephiroth were in the picture. “Him” and “Sephiroth” anyway. Whoever found these actors to play them did a really good job at finding their likeness. Or were really good at altering photos. Sephiroth looked even more ridiculous than when he was pretending to be an office worker. With the shorts, button-up, and the wide sunhat, he looked like a really muscular grandma. Just standing there awkwardly, with his arms to the sides, like he always did with pictures, which he never liked being in. He never liked talking about himself and he never liked pictures. How did they know to get that detail down so well?</p><p>And then there was “Cloud”, wearing trunks and sunglasses, waving. His stomach started to turn a little. Man…</p><p>They really went all out for this. Kinda creepy. Cloud found himself looking up at the corners of the ceiling, to see if he could spot any hidden cameras. Like little black dots where they shouldn’t be. He looked closer at the picture frame, holding it to the sunlight to see if any lenses were reflected in it.</p><p>Nothing. Cloud sighed and put the frame down. This was stupid and he was getting hungry, so he finally wandered into the bathroom to freshen up.</p><p> </p><p>“Morning,” the very convincing Sephiroth impersonator said to Cloud as he wandered into the kitchen, smelling coffee and fried eggs. The way he said it was as light as a spring breeze. His hair was tied back again and he was fiddling with something on the stove. It smelled like rice porridge. He wasn’t dressed for “work” yet, either, which was a little weird. The clock in the living room said it was 8:25 AM.</p><p>As Cloud pulled out a chair and sat down, “Sephiroth” asked, “How did you sleep?”</p><p>He didn’t think he could properly answer. He wasn’t even fully sure why he was waiting around for breakfast, but then again, if this guy insisted on feeding him, he wasn’t going to say no. Even if it were all fake. Hell, even if he were kidnapped, it was an oddly docile kidnapping. If this guy wanted to feed and cuddle him so badly, he could get food out of it. It helped that it was actually <em>good</em>. Maybe when Cloud left, he could suggest getting a dog while he’s at it.</p><p>“Uhh…hmm.” Cloud looked around the room, and at Sephiroth, who was wearing what looked like the lounge version of a yukata but with pants, and blanked on an answer. He yawned. “I dunno…weird.” The light headedness was gone and he had more energy than last time, but he wasn’t sure if he had anything like “restful” sleep.</p><p>“Weird? How so?” Sephiroth poured Cloud some coffee and set the cup in front of him, as if the yawn summoned it. He stared down at the black void of coffee, thinking.</p><p>No cream or sugar. He even knew how Cloud took his coffee.</p><p>Cloud looked up at him, in a sort of confused haze. Sephiroth just stood there, staring, waiting for an answer. His bangs framing his face just emphasized how perfect he looked. He was like if one of those marble statues came to life. He looked created.</p><p>He looked so much like the real Sephiroth. How did this happen?</p><p>Cloud turned away, gluing his eyes to the table.</p><p>“I don’t, uh…” He took a big sip of his coffee and the bitterness woke him up some more. “Do you…” His hands gestured in a bid to grab better words that made even a little bit of sense. “I was sleeping on the couch, right?”</p><p>“Oh, yes.” Nodding, Sephiroth turned back to the stove to finish. He took the frying pan off the stove and went back to the porridge. “I was going to ask you about that. You were in bed when I woke up.”</p><p>Oh, well. That was disappointing. Cloud scratched his head, trying to think.</p><p>If this really were some kind of prank, he could be lying. Someone could have just moved him into the bed. He was half-joking about the Televised Prank idea, but what if it were true? It was kind of a mean prank to pull, too, but a lot of pranks had a mean streak.</p><p>Then again, it couldn’t be that easy to explain. Cloud still couldn’t remember that much before yesterday. Now it’s this sort of vague, impressionistic blur. Every time he tried to look back at it, he felt like he needed glasses.</p><p>Plus, he did sort of vaguely remember going into the bedroom when the lights were off. It wasn’t that weird to forget what happened in the middle of the night. Dreams were like that, too. People forget their dreams all the time.</p><p>“I don’t…know. Sorry.” Cloud shrugged, took a tinier sip of his coffee, then set it to the side. That was enough bitterness for now. Sephiroth set a bowl in front of him. Rice porridge with an egg and…cilantro, maybe?</p><p>“Perhaps you missed me?”</p><p>Cloud let out a bark of surprised laughter at how bold that was. It <em>was </em>technically true, just…like, he had been gone such a long time. Of course he’d miss his hero. He assumed Sephiroth was dead! If this guy was a fake, this wasn’t funny.</p><p>“If you say so.” He didn’t want to get the guy mad or anything, so he dug into his breakfast. Mmm, there was lime in it, too? Nice. At least the food was good, so he could probably stay here another day if he had too. Sephiroth got his own bowl and coffee and settled in, sitting across from Cloud.</p><p>“I don’t understand why you take it black, you never finish it.”</p><p>Cloud set his spoon down. He turned to look at Sephiroth, who was busy eating and going over some kind of packet of papers. That wasn’t meant to be mean. Probably… he said it in such an offhanded way.</p><p>But the thing was that he was <em>right</em>. Cloud always had a habit of taking a couple sips of coffee and then leaving it to cool off. Then he’d dump it out. It didn’t help that most coffee he ran into tasted like ass, but still, coffee was supposed to taste a <em>little</em> bad.</p><p>But how did this guy know that? He didn’t even think the real Sephiroth knew <em>that</em>.</p><p>“…Who are you?” Cloud wanted to ask that more clearly, but it came out as a mumble. He couldn’t even look at the other man. He just sat there and stared at his porridge. His stomach twisted up, so he wasn’t all that hungry anymore. The papers Sephiroth was holding shifted, rustling as he set them down. He could feel “Sephiroth” staring at him.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Who-“ Cloud’s voice quavered, and he had to take a deep breath before trying again, a bit louder this time. “Who are you?”</p><p>He could hear the other man lean closer.</p><p>“Honey, I’m Sephiroth-“</p><p>“No!” Cloud’s mako-enhanced fist banged into the table, forming a hairline crack in it. “No you’re not, he’s-“ He choked up and rubbed at his eyes, which were starting to well up. Why was he crying? “He’s been missing, he’s probably dead, he’s-“</p><p>“<em>Dead?</em>” After a few seconds, Sephiroth got up, mumbling “Worse than I thought,” and grabbed his cell phone, heading into the living room. Cloud didn’t follow him. He wasn’t outright sobbing or anything; he just sat there while tears were streaming down his face. He just…wished the joke was over, if it was one. What was Sephiroth doing? He hoped he was calling whoever was behind this so they could cancel it. This was enough. Just tell him what was really going on. <em>Please.</em></p><p>“Yes…I’ll be staying home today.” He could hear some of what Sephiroth was saying, but not all of it. “Yes, sir,” and “getting worse” and “Thank you, Professor,” but not much else. Cloud didn’t move. His stomach was outright rebelling, so he pushed his food away. He didn’t want to look at it right now.</p><p>After about a minute, Sephiroth came back, patting him on the shoulder. He pulled out one of the extra chairs from the table and sat down, right next to Cloud, holding one hand with both of his.</p><p>“Hey. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” One of his thumbs were gently stroking Cloud’s hand, which felt nice, but… “What’s wrong, my darling? What’s this about me being dead?” His heart pounding, Cloud turned to look at the other man, who looked like he was waiting for Cloud to issue a divine proclamation. With such reverence in his eyes. It threw him off. He shook his head and sighed.</p><p>“Maybe not…dead, but-“ He didn’t remember if that was ever confirmed, so Sephiroth could have just been missing. He couldn’t look at him. It hurt to look at that much “love”, if this was an act. “I don’t know. After we went to Nibelheim, you just…left.” Cloud was fully expecting Sephiroth to ask about Nibelheim, like it never happened, but it never came. He just gave Cloud’s hand a gentle grip, as if in encouragement. Weird. Weird that Cloud felt so comfortable being touched by him, another man. He never really liked being touched.</p><p>“Left?” Cloud nodded at the gentle question, calming down a bit. Okay. He could handle this. Even if this guy wasn’t Sephiroth, he did seem nice enough. Would he really be in on pranking him into thinking they’re gay lovers? Maybe this guy was just confused. It could go either way, honestly.</p><p>“What happened next?” Okay. Well, Sephiroth went into the old mansion for awhile and wouldn’t come out. And then…um. And then, he-</p><p>
  <em>Nibelheim is covered in flames. He tries to help look for survivors but it’s useless. He sees Sephiroth, standing there, while the flames lick around his body and do nothing.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sephiroth turns and smiles-</em>
</p><p>No, that couldn’t be right. Sephiroth would never do that. He couldn’t.</p><p>“Well…um. You were in the mansion, and then…” Cloud trailed off and into a cold sweat. All he was drawing was a blank. “I…I don’t know.” Sephiroth patted his knee, not pressuring him to answer. Just being there with him. If this <em>was</em> the real Sephiroth, he would never do something like-</p><p>Cloud…didn’t want to think about it anymore.</p><p>“I guess it feels like a prank?” He finally looked back up at Sephiroth, who titled his head.</p><p>“What does?”</p><p>“The…married thing.” There was that picture of them at Costa del Sol, which could have been altered, but still. This would all be a lot of work, if this was some big prank. And for what? Why pick Cloud specifically? And how did Sephiroth know such tiny details about him? It’d be way too much effort. That was downright paranoid thinking, the more he considered it. Now that he said that out loud, he felt kind of stupid.</p><p>“A prank? How come?” Sephiroth asked that question with no reservations. He asked it so innocently. Why? Cloud’s heart was going into overdrive, so he took a couple of deep breaths to calm down. The only answer he could think of sounded pretty lame.</p><p>“I didn’t…uh. Think you liked men?”</p><p>Deafening silence while Sephiroth stared at him. To Cloud’s surprise, it looked like the other man’s façade was breaking, a little; he leaned back after awhile and rubbed his face with his hands. If anything, <em>he </em>looked like someone was pulling his leg.</p><p>“Cloud…” he said tiredly into his hands. He didn’t know why, but Cloud suddenly felt defensive.</p><p>“Well! You’re Sephiroth! You <em>are</em> the same Sephiroth from SOLDIER, right?”</p><p>“Cloud-“</p><p>“Are you?”</p><p>“Yes, Cloud.” Sephiroth was trying to keep it together, pressing his fingers to his temples and sighing. “Yes, I was in SOLDIER and I like men. I don’t see how it’s that big of a conceptual leap. Surely you remember Genesis-“ He didn’t, but what did Sephiroth mean by “was”? Did that mean he was in a different department now?</p><p>“I just…I dunno! You could have had any woman you wanted.”</p><p>“I’m not interested in women.”</p><p>Cloud…couldn’t argue with that logic. He sat there, thinking about what all this meant. Sephiroth wasn’t in SOLDIER anymore…so them being in SOLDIER together was still a thing, at least. They went to Nibelheim, that was still a thing. He remembered Sephiroth reacting…badly to the monsters in the Nibelheim reactor, about what that meant for him. And then…</p><p>And then nothing. There was a gap, and then he was in Midgar, in the slums, with Tifa. He tried to cast his mind further back, but he couldn’t. Whenever he did, he’d get scared and he’d get a horrible, cold dread in the pit of his stomach. But he was doing something before he ended up here. Wasn’t he?</p><p>“Cloud?” Sephiroth put his hand on Cloud’s knee again. Cloud took it and looked at the gold ring in his hand. He fiddled with it, unable to look up at him, at Sephiroth’s face.</p><p>“Can you finish your breakfast for me, Cloud?” He sounded more like a parent than a spouse, but Cloud nodded, oddly comforted by the gentle push in some kind of direction. Sephiroth pet his head again, which he loved, and he wasn’t even sure why.</p><p>“Okay. Are you going to finish your coffee?”</p><p>Cloud shook his head.</p><p>“Okay.” Sephiroth took his cup and stood. “You know, if you want cream or sugar, it’s okay. You don’t have to impress me.” He gave Cloud a little nudge, to show that he was joking, but Cloud didn’t feel like laughing. As he was walking over to the sink, Cloud picked up his spoon and stirred his breakfast, half-heartedly. Thinking.</p><p>“…Sephiroth.”</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>Cloud hesitated, trying to think of the clearest way to ask this.</p><p>“What did I recover from?”</p><p>He forgot to ask yesterday. Not that he thought he needed to. It all felt kind of silly at the time, like it was all an act. But now that Cloud felt a gap in his memories, he felt the need to ask. That…couldn’t have been right. He hadn’t seen Tifa in like five years. He went from Nibelheim, to…whatever, to Midgar. Why such a big gap?</p><p>Sephiroth was silent for a little while, then washed his cup out, put it in the drying rack, and turned to face him. His eyes were clouded over. It must have been an uncomfortable topic, with how heavy the air turned.</p><p>“…Mako poisoning.”</p><p>Cloud stared at him, waiting for something to change, or Sephiroth to say, “Just kidding!” or…he didn’t know. He thought about Jessie’s dad, about how he felt this weird…emotion that he couldn’t place, seeing him lying there comatose, and only now, with the possibility of Cloud having had mako poisoning, did he realize that the weird, heavy emotion was <em>empathy</em>. He knew how bad it was because-</p><p>Because-</p><p>“Ma-….Mako? Poisoning?” Cloud asked, dumbfounded. Like he didn’t know what those words meant. Sephiroth gave a small smile and bent down, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder.</p><p>“I know. I should have told you yesterday. But, I’d have to keep telling you every time this happened. I don’t…like to talk about it much.” Sephiroth had to look away, clearly not wanting to think about it either. Cloud just sat there, his brain slowing down, trying to process everything.</p><p>“That’s…people don’t recover from that.”</p><p>“<em>You</em> did.” Sephiroth smiled at that, as if just remembering that lifted his entire mood. “It’s rare, but it’s possible, and you were in that percentage. You’re the less than one percent. You’re a miracle, Cloud.”</p><p>Hearing Sephiroth say that about him made him feel…something. He wasn’t sure what it was, but it made his heart flutter. He didn’t even know if that were true, but he looked up at Sephiroth smiling a little, regardless.</p><p>“Well. You know…” He tried to say something clever, but Sephiroth bent down to kiss his forehead, taking his breath away. For someone who didn’t think he was into men, he sure did like it when Sephiroth touched him. If this was really Sephiroth.</p><p>…He kind of hoped it was.</p><p>“I’d like to think my love helped you recover. What do you think?”</p><p>“Ffth.” Cloud covered his mouth and could feel himself turning red. What an embarrassing thing to say. God! Sephiroth laughed at him, petting his head.</p><p>“Finish up. If you need anything, I’ll be right here. I’m not going anywhere today, all right?”</p><p> </p><p>The day stumbled onwards. Sephiroth said to ask if he had any more questions, but Cloud couldn’t really think of any. Or, maybe he just didn’t want to ask. He wanted to be alone with his thoughts, so Sephiroth left him to it, sticking to the office where he was (probably) doing some important work. Cloud tried to watch something, or read, and that worked for awhile, but he mostly wandered around the place. He tried thinking things through on the couch and had an accidental nap for a few hours.</p><p>He couldn’t square what was happening now, and before this.</p><p>He was <em>pretty</em> sure he was working for AVALANCHE before this (not that he was going to tell Sephiroth. Could you imagine?) He was pretty sure he met Tifa here. And he was <em>really</em> sure that Nibelheim happened. He <em>definitely</em> was at Jessie’s parents too. But…he couldn’t look away from the possibility either. It felt unsettling, in a weird way. Like he was looking at something he wasn’t supposed to see. And it didn’t feel blatantly wrong, either. There <em>was</em> that gap.</p><p>Could he have brain damage? That was possible. That would explain the “gap”. It would explain the “episodes”…if this was real, anyway.</p><p>This was going on way too long to not be real. And that man looked way too much like Sephiroth to be an imposter.</p><p>So what did that mean?</p><p>Married. To Sephiroth?</p><p>Something was smelling really good from the kitchen. Someone was nudging him, waking him up.</p><p>“Hey. Dinner’s ready.” Sephiroth gave him that small, loving smile. Cloud, this time, tried to smile back.</p><p>He kept looking at his ring at the dinner table, spinning it. Thinking. Even if none of this were true, at least he got free meals out of it. It wasn’t so bad. For a “kidnapping”, this sure was the high life compared to the Slums.</p><p>Weird that no one seemed to be looking for him. Did they even know where he was? That he was missing?</p><p>Was he missing at all?</p><p>Cloud ate his dinner and tried to stop thinking.</p><p>They sat around for awhile after that. They didn’t watch anything, but Sephiroth was reading some book. Cloud tried to think about the implications of everything some more, but he eventually just stared off into space. They were falling into the same routine again, of leaning against each other, Sephiroth wrapping his arm around his shoulder and half-holding him. Cloud liking it, relaxing into it. Like his body remembered. Like it missed him.</p><p>Was that actually true?</p><p>When Cloud was idly playing with Sephiroth’s hair (how could he not? It was all over the place) instead of getting mad, Sephiroth took the bulk of it and put it to one side, for him. He’d always heard rumors about him getting defensive about his hair. He started braiding it out of boredom. Sephiroth started petting his hair absentmindedly again, scratching him behind the ears.</p><p>Married, huh? The idea of it made him nervous, but it was the excited kind of nervous. Butterflies in your stomach nervous.</p><p>Sephiroth said that he liked men with no hesitation at all. He had no problems with saying that. He admitted it freely.</p><p>If Sephiroth could say that, then maybe…</p><p>The other man shifted his weight, putting his book to the side. “Well, I suppose.” Sephiroth looked at his new braid and patted it gently, almost as if he were admiring it, before tossing it to his back, keeping it. “Are you staying out here again?”</p><p>Cloud gulped, suddenly breathless. He was suddenly very interested in a random spot on the wall.</p><p>“It’s all right. You can stay out here as long as you like.”</p><p>“No.” Cloud closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “No, it’s fine.”</p><p>“You’re sure?” He was. Cloud had to know. Even if they just slept tonight, he must have went into the bedroom last night for a reason. Even if he were too half-asleep to remember what that reason was.</p><p>“Yeah, I-“ He finally turned to look him in the face. Sephiroth was waiting for him to finish. He kept the braid, too. Cloud tried again. “I mean, I…live? Here?”</p><p>“Haha, you <em>do</em> live here, yes.” Sephiroth stood and stretched. Cloud could see the muscles moving around under his clothes and started sweating. It didn’t stop, even when Sephiroth pulled him off the couch and nudged him to go brush his teeth.</p><p>It was funny. Even when he was taking a shower this morning, he could immediately tell which stuff was his and which was Sephiroth’s. It wasn’t <em>too </em>hard; Sephiroth had the fancy-looking, expensive shampoo while the 3-in-1 stuff was obviously Cloud’s. Still, the fact that it was there in the first place…</p><p>When Cloud was done, he stopped at the foot of the bed, suddenly nervous. Sephiroth wasn’t exactly in bed yet, but he was sitting on his side of it and fiddling with the clock. He looked up at Cloud, aware of the hesitation.</p><p>“…You know, sometimes a bed is just for sleeping. I’ll be good. I promise.” Cloud slowly nodded. Yeah, if Cloud was really having trouble remembering things, he doubted that Sephiroth would pin him down and…do…things.</p><p>Not that there was anything wrong with that. Or that he’d be…opposed. But like…one step at a time here.</p><p>Okay, enough of this. Sighing, Cloud took a deep breath and climbed into bed. He never knowingly shared a bed with someone else, but he must not have had a hard time doing it last time. What if Sephiroth…held him when they slept. He felt himself turning red thinking about it.</p><p>And then Sephiroth took off his top, folding it and tossing it onto a chair before fully sitting on the bed.</p><p>And Cloud <em>jolted.</em></p><p>His heart didn’t stutter, and it didn’t feel like an electric current went through just his heart, or his legs, or anything like that. All of Cloud…jolted. Like he was struck with a sudden, electrifying awareness.</p><p>Sephiroth turned to look at him, and he could see his muscles coil and shift, and his chest heaving as he breathed</p><p>
  <em>He licks the cum off his chest so delicately. He feels Sephiroth twitch under his tongue and is overcome by such immense pleasure</em>
</p><p>One second, Cloud was sitting there, and the next, Cloud had his face buried in Sephiroth’s chest. Kissing it, desperately. Breathing him in. He licked at a nipple and he could feel Sephiroth breathe in sharply. Sephiroth letting out a soft moan. Yes. Cloud started touching himself. He tugged and thrust and moaned into the other man’s chest, trailing down, slowly, desperate to put his mouth on Sephiroth’s cock.</p><p>“Ah, Cloud,” Sephiroth pulled him back up, which was stupid, since it was stopping him from getting his cock sucked. Cloud stared at him in a daze, eyes unfocused, and muttered, “My body remembers…” That’s what it was. If his brain didn’t remember some things, then his body did. It <em>definitely </em>remembered this. Thank God.</p><p>Sephiroth pulled Cloud into his lap and kissed him, on the mouth. They stayed that way for awhile, tongues comfortably entering each other’s mouths. Like they were saying hello. Cloud wrapped his arms around the other man, wanting to stay. He couldn’t remember the last time physical affection felt this nice. Or the last time he felt comfortable with even the idea of it. Sephiroth pulled away, and then leaned into his ear.</p><p>“Cloud.” His voice made Cloud’s skin prickle. He was so excited that he found it hard to breathe. “Would you like a surprise?” Oh. He liked surprises. What could it be? He nodded.</p><p>“Raise up your arms.” He did so, in eager anticipation while Sephiroth took his shirt off. Sephiroth slid off the side of the bed and stood over Cloud, looming over him, pushing him back onto the bed and making him lie down.</p><p>With those eyes, it felt like a wild animal was about to eat him at any second. If it were Sephiroth, Cloud found himself not minding the idea as much.</p><p>“Stay.” He did, waiting for what Sephiroth was planning, letting the man drag his body with ease, until his legs were hanging off the right side of the bed. And then, he knelt down, cradled Cloud’s penis in hands, and kissed it.</p><p>And licked it. Lovingly, along the shaft, circling his tongue around the tip. His fingers gave the balls gentle, circling touches. He cradled it in his mouth and <em>sucked.</em></p><p>Cloud was barely holding it together. Squirming. He couldn’t stop moving his legs, so Sephiroth had to hold them down in an iron grip. The force of it make his dick throb. His tip hit the back of Sephiroth’s throat, and that made his back <em>arch.</em> Sephiroth moaned around him, and <em>that </em>made it hard to think. It was one thing for Sephiroth to say that he liked men, as an idea, and quite another for him to do <em>this</em>, and look at Cloud like <em>that</em>, in a mix of red-hot lust and a softer love. The gentleness and enthusiasm of his actions alone were enough to convince Cloud that this was <em>not</em> a joke.</p><p>What did that mean?</p><p>If this really was his…their…wedding bed…</p><p>Sephiroth’s mouth came off of Cloud’s dick with a wet <em>pop</em> before he stood again, taking off his pants.</p><p>Cloud just lay there, head slightly up, in a daze and unable to discern what he was looking at. Until the other man started touching himself, getting fully hard, and making Cloud’s heart jump up in his throat. Where was that going!? It looked like he’d have to hold it with two hands!</p><p>Sephiroth leaned over him, kissing him, his neck, pressing his hips against Cloud’s, having the other’s dick throb against his own, and suddenly Cloud would let him put that anywhere he liked.</p><p>“Are you ready, Cloud?” <em>Yes.</em> So much yes. He nodded furiously.</p><p>“<em>Please</em>.” He was begging for it, and he didn’t even care. He could feel Sephiroth chuckle, they were so close. Cloud wasn’t even sure how this was going to feel, but with how gentle Sephiroth was being, he wasn’t scared. Not one bit.</p><p>Sephiroth stood up, but instead of…whatever was going to happen, Cloud could hear him rustling around in the nightstand drawer. He was fiddling around with some kind of bottle. He raised his head up to get a good look, but the anticipation was killing him. It looked like it had some kind of pump.</p><p>“What’s-“</p><p>“Shhh.”</p><p>He shushed, laying back down, waiting. One of Sephiroth’s hands was stroking his stomach, petting him in reassurance. Then, there was a pumping noise. One of Sephiroth’s hands went under Cloud’s pelvis, easily raising it.</p><p>That’s when the finger went up his ass.</p><p>Cloud tensed, but as soon as he did, Sephiroth told him to relax. He tried to. He tried taking really slow, deep breaths. Once he did so, it wasn’t actually that bad, it just felt kinda weird. Like he suddenly had to take a shit? He could feel Sephiroth’s finger wiggling around in there.</p><p>“…What are you doing?”</p><p>“You’ll know it when you feel it.”</p><p>…What did that mmMMMM?</p><p>It would be an understatement to say that Cloud’s back arched. It was more accurate to say that his entire body <em>curled</em>, trembling with a wave of pleasure. He felt giddy. It was like a regular jolt of pleasure from jacking off but…<em>more.</em> Enhanced. Through the whole body.</p><p>“Found it.” Sephiroth smiled, took his finger out (which felt even more awkward) and pumped what had to be lube into his hands, stroking his cock. Lifting up Cloud ass-first by the legs with the ease of someone picking up a ball.</p><p><em>Entering </em>him.</p><p>Cloud took a deep breath again, trying to relax, to let it happen. It was thicker than a finger, and burned a little on entry, but Sephiroth inched in slowly, going forward bit by bit. Cloud let his body be handled and hung his head back. Sephiroth filled him, even if he wasn’t going all in. Sephiroth was his…they were…</p><p>Another thrust forward and his body curled. His dick was fully hard now. Cloud wanted to jack off but he didn’t think his arms could work properly. Another thrust forward and he could feel his own cock throb. Another and he stopped thinking, thrusting along with Sephiroth, clenching. He couldn’t see Sephiroth, but he could hear him, and feel him, and that was all that mattered. Sephiroth started to go faster, and that made Cloud see stars. He clenched and twisted, and came all over himself, and was too far gone to feel anything stupid like embarrassment. After minutes that felt like hours, he could feel Sephiroth come inside him, and his toes curled at just the thought of it. Sephiroth. His <em>husband.</em> Beautiful and perfect, and he was all Cloud’s. Even if it did end up being false, he wasn’t all that opposed to the idea. Clearly.</p><p>Sephiroth pulled out and set Cloud down, gently. He knelt, looming over Cloud once again, and started licking the cum off him. It made Cloud squirm a little, and he lifted his head to look at the other man. At his…</p><p>The gentleness, the devotion of it all, made Cloud feel…something he couldn’t describe, but it made him feel like he was full of butterflies. He lifted his hand and touched Sephiroth’s cheek, stroking it, and Sephiroth touched his hand, looking up at Cloud with half-lidded eyes.</p><p>Was this feeling…happiness?</p><p> </p><p>It’s dark again. But he’s surrounded by his new friends, so he’s content. They’re glad to see him, and he’s glad to be there. They wriggle all over him and curl around him, enveloping him in a hug.</p><p>One of them wraps around his head again. It speaks to him, and he listens without hearing, understanding on instinct alone.</p><p>
  <em>It is time. Empty yourself.</em>
</p><p>Finally.</p><p>One of them slithers over his body, to his face, and nuzzles him. He’s being held immobile, not that he needs to be. These are all friends. He kisses the one next to his face, and it slithers into his mouth, down his throat. Into all of him. A warmth spreads through his body, and he smiles around his friend, suckling on him.</p><p>He’s being cleansed. They’re purging everything unnecessary, so he can be reborn.</p><p>His other friends squirm with joy, and wind themselves so tightly around him. Soon. Soon, he’ll be whole again.</p><p>They’re all so excited, and so is he.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hmm, uh-oh! Time for some dread...but a different kind? What's going to happen next!?</p><p>As usual, if you like this, PLEASE say so with kudos or comments. I prefer comments since I'm discovering that I'm kind of bad at gauging the difference between "horror" and "thriller" (I don't have a proper read on what's scary if I'm writing it). And feel free to take a look at my other thing as well. I promise it'll update, this one just have more of a set structure to it, weirdly. Thanks!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Wednesday</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Besides, I like the science department. It’s good to try new things, don’t you think?”</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cloud woke up in Sephiroth’s arms. In <em>their </em>bed.</p><p>He stretched some, yawning and rolling over into Sephiroth’s chest, burying his face in it. Breathing him and his flowery, girly soap smell in. He could feel the other man moving, also waking up. He didn’t want to move. Babies didn’t sleep this well.</p><p>“Hey.” Sephiroth pulled him closer, in a hug, and kissed his forehead. “Good morning.” Cloud craned his neck up and kissed him on the mouth, and they stayed like that for several minutes. Their tongues gently mingled. They enjoyed each other, their taste and scent. He didn’t want to get up, but Sephiroth lifted him, sitting him up as the other man sat up as well. Cloud climbed into his lap and stayed there.</p><p>“How is my little bird this morning?” Little bird. The pet name made his scalp tingle, and he felt so giddy that it made him giggle.</p><p>“Good,” he mumbled into Sephiroth’s chest. Cloud still didn’t remember much, but this was the only other place he lived, aside from his childhood home and the living spaces Shinra gave you when you joined SOLDIER. Having brain damage was the only logical explanation. How else could he have forgotten that this was his life? That he was <em>this</em> lucky? His idol, his hero, here in his arms…</p><p>Sephiroth had to pry him off before getting up, stroking his back in a comforting gesture. “Time to get ready, Cloud, time to get up.” He pouted a bit but relented in the end. He <em>was </em>starting to get hungry. He guessed.</p><p>Cloud planted his face in Sephiroth’s pillow while the other man was in the bathroom. He rolled around on the bed, clinging to the pillow, barely containing himself.</p><p>He hated that this happened, even if Sephiroth said it never lasted long. How awful, having to have this explained to you every time. Still, if he got to learn that that he married his hero, all over again, and feel like this about it every time, there was a silver lining to all this. It’d be like having a honeymoon every few months. The giddy, heart-bursting feeling of knowing that his wish was granted, and he and his hero became something much more than mere “war buddies”…</p><p>You couldn’t bottle this feeling.</p><p>Besides, if his body remembered, his mind would too, eventually. The thought comforted him. He took a deep breath from the pillow and sighed.</p><p>Maybe getting out of bed wouldn’t be so bad, if all days felt like this.</p><p> </p><p>When Cloud was finally done showering, Sephiroth was already making breakfast. It was nice, him being able to do that, but Cloud felt a little bad about it. Sephiroth was the one who had to go to work, although he insisted that the company understood. It’s not like they could fire him about it. Apparently, he was in the Science and Research division now, so the most exciting thing he was working on was writing proposals.</p><p>“You mean under Hojo?” Cloud knew, even way back when, that he never liked the guy (for good reason, no one seemed to like Hojo), so that sounded like an odd setup. They’d probably be at each other’s throats most of the time. But instead of having a snide answer for Cloud, or complaining about his “boss”, Sephiroth started laughing. Like a lot. He dropped his spatula and covered his mouth, bent over in laughter. Loud, high, gales of laughter, like Cloud said the funniest thing in the world. For a full minute, Cloud thought he was sobbing. After the “sobbing”, Sephiroth finally coughed, calming himself, picking the spatula back off the counter and turning to Cloud. There were tears in his eyes but he was grinning widely, so whatever Cloud said must have been hilarious.</p><p>“No! Haha, you’re so silly, Cloud.” Sephiroth drew up a cup of coffee and handed it to Cloud, still smiling, still giggling about the idea of it. “Under Hojo,” he’d mutter to himself when he was back at the stove, and snicker. He never elaborated on his answer.</p><p>Not wanting to breach the subject anymore, Cloud took a sip of his coffee and made a face. Hmm. Come to think of it, he wasn’t really sure why he always took it black. He never liked straight coffee all that much.</p><p>“Um, can I…have…cream and sugar, please?”</p><p>“Oh.” That must has snapped Sephiroth out of his Hojo-induced…mania?...because he went to the fridge for some cream and got the sugar bowl. “Of course. As much as you like.” While Cloud was fixing his coffee, the other man idly watched him, perhaps admiring him, for a little while before going back to the stove, humming to himself. The coffee tasted a lot better and the morning continued. When they were done eating, Sephiroth leaned forward and patted his shoulder.</p><p>“And how are we feeling today?”</p><p>“…Better.” Cloud nodded at him and leaned in for a kiss, which he received. He’d never get tired of that. “Some stuff is still missing, but it feels…” He looked off into space, trying to think of a proper word for it.</p><p>“Real?”</p><p>Cloud thought about it, then nodded at the suggestion. “Yeah, like…more solid, I think.”</p><p>“Oh, good. That’s a good sign.” Sephiroth pulled Cloud into another kiss, then stood up.</p><p>“I’ll be in the office. Nothing to do but writing and calls, so don’t hesitate to let me know if you need anything. Okay?” He held Cloud’s face in his hands, by the chin, like he was some kind of puppy, and Cloud nodded. He’d be fine, if a little bored. Maybe he’d find something to work on, to pass the time, but at least he was starting to feel better.</p><p> </p><p>About an hour into reading the rest of the book he started yesterday, the phone rang. It was a landline, so the call probably wasn’t for Sephiroth, or they didn’t know his cell phone number. There wasn’t any reason for him to get it, so Cloud should probably answer it. Briefly wondering if he had a cell phone as well (would he need one? he wasn’t too wild about leaving the house) Cloud wandered over to the phone charging on the kitchen counter and picked it up.</p><p>“Hello?”</p><p>“Cloud?” At least, he thought that’s what they were saying. There was a lot of static on the line and he could barely tell who it was. It sounded like a woman’s voice, though.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Cloud! Where are-“ More static. She was starting to cut out, but whoever this was, she sounded really familiar. “What’s------? Wake up!”</p><p>“Uh…” Wake up? What? “I’m sorry, you’re cutting out. Who is this?”</p><p>“This is-“ A loud, angry beeping came over the receiver, like someone dialed a fax line instead, giving Cloud a start and making him almost drop the phone. He put his ear back to the receiver when it stopped and everything was way too garbled. She sounded warped and was cutting out every couple of seconds.</p><p>“This isn’t funny. Who is this?” He should have been scared, and this <em>was </em>making his stomach turn, but he was mostly just angry. Probably a crank caller or something.</p><p>“IT’S-“ The beeping dial-up noise came back, louder, shrieking. Cloud was so fed up with it that he hung up. It said, “UNKNOWN” on the caller ID too, so he probably should have just let it ring. The cold feeling in the pit of his stomach stayed as he went back to the living room, and he wasn’t even sure way. Definitely a crank caller. What kind of asshole just tells somebody to “wake up”? Like he was in a coma? Get fucked, loser.</p><p>As soon as his was sitting down, the phone rang again. Cloud let it ring several times, but whoever was on the other end couldn’t take a hint. Sighing, he got back up to check who it was, and the ID said “STRIFE, C” …Strife? Cloud picked up the phone.</p><p>“Hello?”</p><p>“Hi honey!”</p><p>“…Mom!” Oh, duh. STRIFE, C…Claudia Strife. The heaviness in his stomach didn’t leave, but the other phone call must have bothered him more than he thought. “Hey. Sorry I didn’t answer sooner, some asshole was crank calling earlier.”</p><p>“Cloud, watch your mouth.”</p><p>“Sorry…” This felt…weird, but he couldn’t really place why. He couldn’t think of any reason why his mom wouldn’t be calling him. Maybe if it were long distance, which it was, but she’d still make the effort, right? “Some…girl,” He thought, anyway, “was crank calling.”</p><p>“Ohhh, right,” Mom said, sounding like she was thinking about something. “A…<em>fan</em>girl?”</p><p>“Mom…”</p><p>“Were they?”</p><p>“I don’t know.” Cloud had a feeling they had a conversation like this every time she called.</p><p>“Well, you know how obsessive they can get. I’m surprised they haven’t mailed a pipe bomb to your house!” She paused. “Oh my God, <em>have they?</em>”</p><p>“Mom, no.” Cloud didn’t actually know, but even if he did, he wouldn’t just tell her that.</p><p>“I don’t know…”</p><p>“You would have heard about it on the news if they did.”</p><p>She sighed into the phone. “I guess. I’m afraid one of them’s gonna find you and skin you alive.” Well, it wasn’t like he’s been leaving the house lately, so good luck doing that.</p><p>“Don’t worry. I’m being taken good care of.” He prayed, from the bottom of his heart, that she wouldn’t start asking about the more…private meaning of that.</p><p>“Wellll, he better be. After everything.” After everything…was she talking about the mako poisoning? Before Cloud could ask, she said, “At least God gave you good taste in men.”</p><p>“Grrk! Mom…”</p><p>They talked for over an hour, about what was happening. Cloud was afraid that he’d have to admit he was in the middle of another “episode”, but Mom did most of the talking, telling him what was going on in Nibelheim. It was a small mountain town, but she still had a lot to say about the people, at least.</p><p>“How’s Tifa doing?”</p><p>“…Tifa?” Cloud paused, not sure how to answer. He didn’t remember Tifa being in Midgar. He hadn’t seen her ever since he stopped by Nibelheim five years ago. His stomach clenched. “I thought she was still in Nibelheim?”</p><p>“What? No, remember, I was talking about Tifa and Johnny heading over to Midgar for work?” Tifa…now that he thought about it, that crank caller did sound a lot like her, but it was hard to tell. But she wouldn’t make a call like that, would she?</p><p>She sounded really worried.</p><p>“I…no, I don’t.”</p><p>“…Honey, is this another ‘episode’?”</p><p>“No!” That was louder and more defensive than he would have liked, so he relented. “Y-yeah, kinda. It’s calming down.”</p><p>“Don’t tell me Sephiroth is leaving you alone in the house!” Mom sounded like she was going to wind herself up and march over to Midgar to give him a piece of her mind.</p><p>“No, Mom, he’s working from home. It’s fine.”</p><p>“…Are you sure?”</p><p>“<em>Yes</em>, I saw him go in there.”</p><p>“…Okay.” She didn’t sound very convinced, but Cloud changed the subject just to move on.</p><p>“Are you saying I ran into Tifa?”</p><p>“Oh, well…” The way she said that was said with a shrug, he could tell even over the phone. “I assumed you would have run into her by now. She’s been over there for a month, but Midgar’s so <em>big</em>, you can probably be in different sectors and never run into each other. She went with Johnny. You remember him?”</p><p>“…Barely.”</p><p>“<em>Well</em>, I heard that-“ She continued, mostly with speculation about what Tifa and Johnny were doing, and he was trying to pay attention, but that weird call…well.</p><p>Tifa probably would have visited by now if she could, right? Or if she wanted to. Maybe they were stuck in the slums and couldn’t get up here so easily. But she could have found a phone number. He still wasn’t totally sure if that was her calling or not.</p><p>Then again, it’s not like they were that close. She always had her group of friends she hung out with more. And she was here with Johnny. Maybe she got sick of waiting around for a hero and picked someone else. …Well, good for her.</p><p>By the time the phone call ended, the crank call faded from his mind, but the weird feeling in his stomach didn’t.</p><p> </p><p>Bored. After lunch, Cloud tried to look through something useful, like one of the cookbooks, but his mind couldn’t stick to it. Too much restlessness and that weird feeling kept distracting him. What to do…</p><p>He didn’t really feel like watching television, but he wasn’t tired enough for a nap either. Well, maybe putting on a boring show would change that.</p><p>Cloud turned on the TV and started flipping through for whatever seemed “boring” but not bad. Like the sweet spot of non-offensively boring that he could let drone on in the background for awhile. Shopping. Cartoons. Music videos. Hmm. Too bad nothing good was on when most people were at work.</p><p>He stopped on the news, which could have worked if he kept the volume low. It looked like they were taking man on the street interviews in the slums. Man, that’s why he didn’t like watching the news all that much; it always bummed him out. Who knew that life could be so different in the same place? He always felt so powerless when seeing that kind of stuff. Well, whatever. Cloud got the throw blanket and wrapped himself in it, settling into the couch.</p><p>He wasn’t paying that much attention, but the guy the interviewer was talking to looked like a real character. Super jacked and with a gun replacing one of his arms. He looked…pretty cool, actually. Like an action movie star? Wow…despite everything, the slums must be an exciting place. Different worlds.</p><p>“Yeah, I got somethin’ to say. <em>Cloud Strife!</em>”</p><p>Cloud’s brain stopped. In a move that made him feel very silly, he slowly pointed at himself, like he was asking the question, “Who, me?”</p><p>“Yes, you, dummy! Open your ears!” The guy was looking right at the camera…at <em>him?</em> No, it couldn’t be. It was hard to tell because the guy was wearing sunglasses, but he couldn’t be..talking to him? No, that was. That was a <em>crazy </em>thing to think.</p><p>Cloud turned the volume up, despite everything.</p><p>“Thanks. Now that I have your attention: What the<em> fuck </em>are you <em>doin’?</em> Huh? You think you can just sit on your ass while the Planet <em>bleeds?</em> Where the <em>fuck</em> are you!?”</p><p>“Uh, c-careful…” The interviewer was getting nervous, probably at all the swearing. Cloud dropped the remote. The feeling in his stomach spread out, and his limbs started to shake.</p><p>“Now you listen up. If you don’t get your dumb ass, spikey-haired ass, flat-as-a-pancake ass back to the Seventh Heaven this <em>instant</em>, I’m gonna add ‘broke ass’ to those descriptions cuz you’ll be out of a fuckin’ job!”</p><p>“Okay! That’s all the time we have-“ The interviewer tried to take the microphone away, but the guy shoved him to the side.</p><p>“Marlene’s worried about you! <em>Tifa’s</em> worried about you! If you think I’m gonna just let you sit there-“</p><p>Cloud reached for the remote, fumbling with it, looking for the power button. Why couldn’t he find it? His eyes were blurry and when he blinked, hot tears fell onto his hands, on the remote.</p><p>“Don’t. You. <em>Even</em> think about turning this off! Cloud! I’m warning you-“</p><p>Blip. Cloud shut the TV off, dropping the remote. He tried to get up with the blanket, but he slid onto the floor. His legs weren’t working.</p><p>He laid on the floor for an unknowable amount of time, huddled in the blanket.</p><p>The TV was talking to him. That weird phone call. The TV said that Tifa was worried. He hasn’t seen Tifa in Midgar, he thinks. He hasn’t run into her, that he knew of.</p><p>He was going insane. His heart was in his throat and he couldn’t breathe.</p><p>In a pathetic attempt to move, Cloud tried to get up, and ended up crawling on the floor. He tried to look around, but everything looked so strange, like cardboard cutout stands. The furniture looked like it could have tipped over at any second. He closed his eyes and went for the direction of the office door, afraid that if he opened them the floor wouldn’t be there, and he’d fall, and keep falling for eternity.</p><p>He wanted Sephiroth. He wanted his brain to not be like this, so they could be fully happy. He wished he knew where things were in this place so he could help out more. He didn’t like that Sephiroth had to be his caretaker every time this happened. He just wanted a happy life, with him. Was that so bad? Didn’t they deserve that?</p><p>Cloud reached ahead of him and felt a door, and knocked. He knocked until his arm felt tired, and then he laid down on the floor, letting his face feel the carpet, because that felt real. He could hear the door open and Sephiroth said something, but he couldn’t understand what that was. But he could feel Sephiroth’s hands touching him, sitting him up, holding him, and that was enough for him to breathe. He tried to tell him what happened.</p><p>“TV…talking to me.”</p><p>“Shh.”</p><p>“M’ crazy,” Cloud said into Sephiroth’s chest. The other man was stroking his back wordlessly. The scent of the soap he used, and his hair, were so strong and real that things started snapping back together for him. Cloud moved Sephiroth’s curtain of hair out of the way and looked around. There was a soft yellow light. There were even more bookshelves, with all kinds of books on them, and a desk with a laptop on it. Real. This was real. He reached down and felt the floor, and tried moving his legs again with minor success.</p><p>“Hi, Cloud!” An older woman’s voice was coming from the computer. He didn’t recognize the voice, or the person on the screen, but he couldn’t see her that well from where he was sitting. For a second, it made his heart thump again, until it hit him that Sephiroth was probably in a video call, and sighed in mild relief when she started talking to Sephiroth.</p><p>“Is he all right?”</p><p>“I hope so.” Sephiroth tilted Cloud’s face up to look at him, and seeing it…his nose, his lips, his mesmerizing eyes, made things snap into place completely. Real. Real.</p><p>“Do you want to see your mother-in-law?” …Mother-in-law? Last he knew, Jenova was Sephiroth’s “mother”, and he didn’t know that much about her except that she died. Sephiroth stood and pulled him up, helping him walk closer to the computer, where the lady on the screen was waving at him.</p><p>“How are you feeling?” It was a question a professional would ask, like a doctor, with the same level tone and everything, and now that Cloud was close enough to see her, he definitely saw the resemblance between her and Sephiroth. They had the same nose and mouth, and the same affinity for long hair; she wore hers in a high, brown ponytail, and wore a lab coat over her clothes.</p><p>“Um…” He looked down at the floor, feeling rather silly about his sudden meltdown. “Better, I think.”</p><p>“Do you remember me?” He shook his head, suddenly hating that he couldn’t remember such basic things. “I’m Lucrecia.” She leaned forward, like she was about to tell him some dark secret. She whispered into the computer mic, “I’m Sephiroth’s mommy.”</p><p>Sephiroth made a noise that might have been a flustered laugh and Cloud could feel the  embarrassment radiating off of him, even without looking at him. At least someone here was trying to lighten the mood.</p><p>“Do you…work together?”</p><p>“I’m also his boss,” she continued to whisper, like they were keeping secrets.</p><p>“<em>One</em> of them, yes.” Sephiroth said in a tone that begged to move on.</p><p>“Heh heh, fine, fine.” Lucrecia said with an impish smirk while her son sat in the computer chair, still covering his face. It was so strange to think about Sephiroth having real human parents, but Cloud couldn’t really deny the resemblance. He idly wondered who his dad was but didn’t think to ask.</p><p>“Wasn’t he showing progress?” Lucrecia asked, over Cloud, and Cloud was starting to resent everyone having to take that tone. That “ooh, poor baby” tone of voice. It wasn’t their fault, that he was acting like this. Anyone would be concerned about it, wouldn’t they? He just hated that he had to be treated so gently, in case something else might break.</p><p>What if it got worse? What if he was barely coherent within a few years?</p><p>Sephiroth sighed, rubbing the small of Cloud’s back. “I thought so…Cloud?” He turned to look at his husband, and felt a little bit better, although to be honest, the idea of Sephiroth having to be a caretaker for the rest of their lives wasn’t that comforting either. “Can you tell us what happened? Maybe we can figure something out. What do you think?” Figure something out…yeah. They were both scientists. Surely at least one of them would have an idea. Cloud nodded, suddenly determined. He was gonna beat this thing, for their happiness, no matter what.</p><p>“Okay. I think…I was hallucinating. Someone on the TV was talking to me. Like, he said my name? And he knew what I was doing, like with the remote. Before that, someone on the phone was telling me to wake up.” He looked between the two of them, hopeful for some kind of answer, but mother and son looked at one another in a heavy silence. Cloud slowly deflated.</p><p>“That’s…new.” Lucrecia said, although she didn’t seem all that sure. “Isn’t it?”</p><p>“Yes.” Sephiroth took Cloud’s hands in his, so they could face each other. “Are they telling you to do anything bad? Were they familiar?”</p><p>Cloud cast his mind back. He didn’t recognize the guy on TV at all. The voice on the phone <em>could</em> have been Tifa, but then, it could have easily been someone else, with how distorted the voice was. He shook his head.</p><p>“No…I didn’t recognize them. They didn’t tell me to do anything violent either. They just wanted me to leave. They sounded worried.” Sephiroth squinted his eyes in thought and turned to look at the screen.</p><p>“Did you get all that?”</p><p>“Mmn.” Lucrecia nodded, chewing on the end of a pencil. “It probably isn’t psychosis, then.”</p><p>“Uh-“ Cloud interrupted them, wanting to get his main question out of the way. “Am I gonna get worse?"</p><p>“Oh, darling.” Sephiroth pulled him into a hug, which was nice, but not a definite answer. Cloud let his head rest in the crook of his neck, though, which was some consolation. “Of course not. You’re getting better every day. Isn’t he, Mother?”</p><p>“It’s okay, I know you’re just saying that.” Cloud mumbled into his neck, resigned to the idea of eventually being wheeled around places by the man he loved and constantly hearing voices.</p><p>Lucrecia cleared her throat, “<em>Actually</em>, he isn’t. You’ve been doing remarkably well in your recovery.” Cloud lifted his head and he could see her leaning down and away from the camera, rummaging around like she was looking for something, and coming up with some papers. Maybe he shouldn’t have been so surprised that Shinra scientists were keeping track of him. Sephiroth did have a point; his recovery was rare, so they’d want to record everything about it. His heart felt a little less heavy at the possibility of something being done.</p><p>“The <em>main</em> problem is that mako poisoning recovery is very rare. We don’t have very much evidence from testimonies, so we can only hypothesize about the after effects. So until we fully know what’s happening, there isn’t much to do but wait and see what happens. But most of the time, you’ve been perfectly fine. You just get brief periods of amnesia.”</p><p>“Oh…” It <em>did</em> make Cloud feel a little better to hear that from someone who knew the science behind it all and he nodded, standing a little bit straighter. “That’s…good? What about the voices, though?”</p><p>“Hmm.” Lucrecia swiveled in her office chair, apparently deep in thought.</p><p>“You said it wasn’t psychosis, right?” Sephiroth asked, prodding. “And the inconsistency of it doesn’t map to physical brain damage.”</p><p>“Right. I might have a hypothesis, but it’s more Gast’s territory, I think.”</p><p>“…What does that mean?” Cloud asked, more to Sephiroth than anyone else.</p><p>“Anthropological,” he answered, then turned back to the screen. “You mean regarding the Ancients?”</p><p>“Yes…the short version is, he could be hearing voices from the Planet.”</p><p>The two men stared at the screen, dumbfounded.</p><p>“But…” Sephiroth was at a loss for words, thinking of the implications. “Mother, Cloud isn’t an Ancient.” He paused, then turned to look at Cloud, almost studying him. “<em>Are </em>you?”</p><p>“No! I think?” Cloud shook his head, sighing. “I don’t get it.”</p><p>“Okay, well,” Lucrecia scratched her head, reaching for the best way to explain this. “You know how humans and the Ancients split from the same family?”</p><p>“Sure…” Sephiroth was fully listening, still holding Cloud’s hand, but Cloud had a feeling this was all going to go over his head.</p><p>“Well, the Ancients were nomadic, right? They went to different places where there were large mako deposits, like fountains and materia deposits. Cloud,” she at least tried to bring him into the conversation so he didn’t feel completely lost. “You know how people living in mountainous areas like Nibelheim are more used to thinner air, right?”</p><p>“I guess…” Cloud shrugged, but Sephiroth was staring off into space suddenly, the gears turning in his head.</p><p>“You’re saying…they were more connected to the Planet because they adapted to contact with the Lifestream?”</p><p>“Bingo! But humans settled down and didn’t have to follow the Lifestream anymore. They wouldn’t need to keep track of the flow, so they lost that connection over time.”</p><p>“I see…” Both of them, being scientists, were heavily thinking about the implications of this, but Cloud had other questions.</p><p>“Uh, so…You’re saying I’m connected to the Lifestream?”</p><p>“Wellllll…probably. It’s just a hypothesis, so we can’t say for sure.”</p><p>“Umm.” This might have been a silly question, but he had to know. “Are the voices…good, then?”</p><p>Mother and son had to think about that for at least a minute. It was Lucrecia who spoke first.</p><p>“Not…necessarily. The Planet isn’t good or bad. It’s trying to survive just like anyone else. And if you were connected, you might not know what to do with that information or how to handle it.”</p><p>“I can handle things…” Cloud muttered, even if he wasn’t completely convinced by his own statement.</p><p>“I think she means culturally, dear.”</p><p>“Right. The Ancients based much of their culture on communicating with the Planet. You wouldn’t have that cultural base, so your mind wouldn’t know what to do with it. It’s like when some cultures take psychedelic drugs for religious rituals. If you did that without that base, the ‘trip’ wouldn’t go anywhere. And there’s that old folk belief of people’s souls being stuck in the Lifestream when they’re mako poisoned. That’s part of it too. Regular humans wouldn’t know how to navigate the Lifestream like the Ancients.”</p><p>Cloud nodded very slowly, trying to take all this information in.</p><p>“So, I’m…fine?”</p><p>“Hopefully!”</p><p>“Hopefully?” He made a face at the ambiguity of it all. “Is it a yes or no?”</p><p>Lucrecia smiled at such a naïve question. “Science isn’t as cut and dry as most people think, dear. Besides, we can’t exactly go back in time and ask the Ancients, so most of it is conjecture.”</p><p>“If it’s the first instance of it,” Sephiroth chimed in, grabbing both his hands again, “we’ll just have to record when they happen and look for any patterns. It’s possible that it’s just a fluke. Okay?” He beamed at Cloud, who couldn’t help but smile back and nod. Right. Despite everything, he was in good hands, wasn’t he?</p><p>Lucrecia cleared her throat deliberately into the mic.</p><p>“Aha, I guess I’d better get back to work.”</p><p>“Ohhh no, don’t let me interrupt you two, or anything.”</p><p>“Do you want to stay in here for awhile, Cloud? I know you’re probably bored.”</p><p>Cloud shook his head, feeling at least a little bit better. “I’m okay.”</p><p>“You’re sure?”</p><p>“Yes…”</p><p>“There’s plenty of things to read in here.”</p><p>Neither of them was going to let the other one finish and leave. It was like the in-person version of <em>You hang up first-No, you hang up first-No, YOU</em> and so on, so Lucrecia had to be the one to break up this shameless display.</p><p>“God, you two are so cavity-inducing.” Neither of them could help but laugh at that.</p><p>Saying goodbye to the two of them, Cloud walked out to the living room. The floor was there under his feet. Everything was solid. He got a snack from the fridge and settled into the couch, trying to put the strange events of the day behind him.</p><p> </p><p>His friends are here again. He’s held immobile in their loving embrace and he feels empty and light. He is purified and his heart soars in happiness. He is delightfully open.</p><p>The friend wrapped around his head whispers into his mind.</p><p>
  <em>Vessels need to be filled.</em>
</p><p>That is a very wise thing to say and he nods. Vessels <em>do </em>need filling. That’s what they’re <em>for.</em></p><p>The other friend, the one who emptied him, slithers up to his face again, nuzzling him and vibrating in a way that could, from a certain perspective, be called ‘purring’. He kisses it and opens his mouth obediently, ready to receive. It slithers inside, relaxing all of his muscles to make the process easier. The others squirm around him, almost massaging him, rewarding him for being so good. Another friend slithers inside the other way, and makes him feel even better, settling his mind and helping him focus.</p><p>Vessels need to be filled.</p><p>Vessels need to be filled.</p><p>Vessels-</p><p> </p><p>“Cloud?”</p><p>“Mmn?” Cloud was being nudged awake and he yawned, rolling over onto his stomach. He must have dozed off, but if he was dreaming, he barely remembered it. Now he felt even <em>more</em> tired.</p><p>Sephiroth wouldn’t stop nudging him. Cloud tried to sink into the couch even further and kicked his legs.</p><p>“Stop.” He mumbled into the couch cushions.</p><p>“Dinner’s ready.” Groaning, Cloud finally pried himself up and off the couch at the promise of food. The one way into his heart, apparently. That wasn’t so bad. And the kitchen smelled really good, again. Hmm.</p><p>As they ate, Cloud chewed on his greens, thinking. Squirming in his seat and having a weird, antsy feeling that he couldn’t place.</p><p>“So…I can’t work, right?”</p><p>“Right.”</p><p>“And you’re working to support me too, right?”</p><p>Sephiroth paused, raising an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“Not necessarily. You get workman’s comp. So not for expenses, no.”</p><p>“Oh.” He wasn’t expecting that answer. At least he was being paid to stay home. That was oddly generous of the company, though. “Um…” He chewed his food like he was chewing on cud, and thought, and thought.</p><p>“So…why did you quit SOLDIER?”</p><p>Sephiroth’s fork froze in midair. He set it down and sighed, looking like he was staring off at something very distant. Then, he turned to Cloud and smiled.</p><p>“I wanted a less dangerous job.” He left the reason for <em>that </em>unsaid, but Cloud decided to bring it out in the open.</p><p>“…For me?”</p><p>“Absolutely.”</p><p>Cloud was trying to square this with what he knew of the old Sephiroth, the General. <em>His </em>General.</p><p>“Sorry. I know SOLDIER was important to you.” Never mind that, Sephiroth <em>was </em>SOLDIER. He was the foundation for it. And he quit. Because of Cloud. Before he further blamed himself for that, Sephiroth reached out and grabbed his hand, squeezing it.</p><p>“Hey. Don’t be sorry. This is even more important. Okay?” He stroked Cloud’s hand, and just looking at Sephiroth’s love-fiddled expression made whatever guilt was left evaporate. “Besides, I like the science department. It’s good to try new things, don’t you think?”</p><p>Cloud nodded and couldn’t help but smile back at him. Yeah, if Sephiroth wasn’t burdened, he shouldn’t feel worried about it.</p><p>“Besides, it pays better.”</p><p>“Wh-really?”</p><p>“Oh, absolutely.”</p><p>Dinner continued, and the more he ate, the more motivated Cloud felt. When he got better, he was going to do more than sit around the house! He was gonna help out more. And he was gonna keep his memories, too. If Sephiroth’s love really did bring him back, then Cloud’s love could motivate him to get even better. He was sure of it. He would never forget this life, as long as he lived.</p><p>“Okay!” Cloud was so excited when he got up that he started doing squats. “First thing I’m gonna do is learn to cook.”</p><p>Sephiroth took his plate and put a hand on his shoulder, stopping him.</p><p>“But you don’t…cook…”</p><p>“I know. I’m gonna learn, though.”</p><p>“Oh, yeah?” Sephiroth asked while bringing their plates to the sink.</p><p>“Yeah, and then I’m gonna do more to help out, and make sure my brain stays working.”</p><p>“Can Cloud come help me with the dishes while he’s at it?”</p><p>He could, in fact, do that. Drying the dishes was actually a much more engaging used of time than just sitting around like a little kid.</p><p>When they were done, all of his previous energy combined with his antsyness from earlier into the closest he’s ever been to hyper in years. There were so many things he could be doing. While Sephiroth was in the living room, Cloud tried looking up recipes again, and even though he had the energy for it, his mind kept wandering. There had to be some way he could jumpstart his memory.</p><p>Even if his mind didn’t remember, his body did…</p><p>…The hyper energy was quickly becoming something more…uncomfortable, and Cloud squirmed in his seat until he had an idea. Springing out of his seat, he wandered over to the living room and gave Sephiroth, who was sitting around and reading again, a hug from behind.</p><p>“Sephiroth.” Cloud kissed the back of his head, then stuck his face in his hair.</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>“Can we do something?”</p><p>“Oh, like watch a movie?” Cloud leaned in and kissed Sephiroth’s cheek, and trailed down his neck so no, probably not watch a movie.</p><p>“Something….sexy.” He said into Sephiroth’s neck.</p><p>“Ohh.” The other man brought his hand up to Cloud’s head, petting him and pressing him into his neck, to keep going. “And what sexy thing does Cloud have in mind?” Cloud nibbled on the crook of Sephiroth’s neck, formulating his plan further, then stood up and slid onto the couch, laying in his husband’s lap.</p><p>“Something we do a lot. Something that could jog my memory? I don’t know what, though, is the thing.” Hopefully, that would start to change.</p><p>“Hmm.” Inspiration striking, Sephiroth snapped his book shut and shifted his weight, making Cloud sit up. “I know just the thing, I think. Wait here.” He stood and sauntered over to the bedroom, then poked his head out again.</p><p>“Don’t come til I call you. I mean it.” He closed the door and Cloud had no choice but to wait. Man…if he were taking this that seriously, it was bound to be good, right? It was hard not to get impatient, but Cloud did the best he could to wait, short of laying face down on the coach and screaming into a pillow. It felt like it took ages before Sephiroth called him to come inside. Hooo, if it was gonna be like last night…Cloud’s heart almost leapt out of his chest as he made a beeline for the doorway. He could hear the <em>clomp</em> of heavy boots as Sephiroth took a seat on the bed and he looked inside.</p><p>Sephiroth…</p><p>There he was, in his old leather jacket and pants. His boots…his gloves, He even still had his belt buckle with the SOLDIER logo. He just sat there, with this smug, almost serene look on his face.</p><p>Cloud’s mouth hung open as he stared in disbelief.</p><p>“Hello, Cloud.”</p><p>“Y-…You kept it?”</p><p>“Sure.” Sephiroth stood, practically looming over him, the pauldrons just making his shoulders look even wider. That was probably half the point of them. He walked closer, backing Cloud into the wall until his back was to it, putting his hand up to the wall to trap him. Cloud gulped, his mind racing. If this was what it looked like…it looked like the lead-up to one of the fantasies he’d had, back in SOLDIER. …Actually, this could easily be the start to, like, at least eighty percent of them.</p><p>How did he know about any of those?</p><p>Well, probably because Cloud told him about them. It was the only logical explanation. That was probably one reason why he kept the outfit too, aside from sentimentality.</p><p>“It still looks good on you…” Cloud reached up to touch Sephiroth’s almost bare chest (Sephiroth forgoing the shirt always drove him bananas), but Sephiroth slapped his hand down and gave him a stern look.</p><p>“Did I give you permission to speak, Cadet?” Oh. Oh, God.</p><p>So, he could narrow it down now to at <em>least </em>twenty percent. With how this was going, it was questionable if Cloud would last through five minutes of this, if this was going where he thought it was.</p><p>“N-No…”</p><p>“No?”</p><p>“No, sir!”</p><p>“Why are you not standing at attention, Cadet?” Cloud immediately stood at attention (in more ways than one), years of training burned into his body through muscle memory. Wow, this <em>was</em> a good move. If he didn’t remember much of this life, he was bound to remember his life in the infantry and beyond. That was still as clear as day. Sephiroth sure had some good ideas.</p><p>“Yes, sir! Thank you, sir!”</p><p>“Hmph.” Satisfied, Sephiroth sauntered over to the bathroom, looked inside, then beckoned for Cloud.</p><p>“Forward.” The thing one needed to understand about Sephiroth was that, even during his SOLDIER days, he never shouted commands or raised his voice at new recruits or cadets. That was because he didn’t have to. He gave orders, and you obeyed. End of discussion.</p><p>Cloud marched forward, not feeling silly at all. Sephiroth’s heavy voice gave an immediacy to orders and he fell in line immediately. How often have they done this?</p><p>“Halt.” He stopped.</p><p>“Right face.” He turned to face the bathroom doorway, still at attention. Ready for orders. A tingle went up his spine in his all excitement. Sephiroth leaned into him from the back, smashing his pecs into his upper back, and he was ready for Sephiroth to take him right there, but he was sure that wasn’t where this was going. This was going to be torturous.</p><p>Sephiroth pointed into the bathroom.</p><p>“What’s that, Cadet?”</p><p>“The bathroom, sir!” Oh. It was <em>this</em> one, was it? This was a really embarrassing one, but it was nice to know that Sephiroth played along with this at least more than once. Sephiroth leaned into his ear and whispered, trying to break Cloud’s concentration so he could be…properly…disciplined.</p><p>“Can you find anything wrong, Cadet?”</p><p>Cloud squinted, trying to see any flaw in the, to him, pristine bathroom. The bathtub looked fine. The shower looked fine, although he wasn’t totally sure where everything was supposed to be yet. That was a little unfair, but maybe this could be another memory exercise.</p><p>“No, sir! Sorry, sir!”</p><p>“Really. Well…” Sephiroth cracked his knuckles as he trailed off, making Cloud sweat. His gloved finger felt smooth and supple trailing down the back of Cloud’s neck, but he didn’t break attention. “The bottles are switched. Your toothbrush isn’t properly put away. You didn’t wipe off the counter when you were done, and you didn’t clean the spots off the mirror. Did you Cadet?”</p><p>Breathless and panting, Cloud said, “No, sir! Sorry, sir!”</p><p>“That’s very disappointing, isn’t it?”</p><p>“Yes, sir!”</p><p>“I’ll have to discipline you properly, won’t I?”</p><p>“Yes, sir! Thank you, sir!”</p><p>Sephiroth stood in front of him, blocking the doorway. Looming, looking at Cloud with hungry eyes and licking his lips. To his credit, Cloud still stood at attention and didn’t break. It would get much harder to do that when Sephiroth reached foreword with his gloved hand, slipped inside Cloud’s pants, and grabbed his cock, holding it.</p><p>Cloud inhaled sharply but didn’t buckle. He kept at attention, standing ramrod straight. Sephiroth leaned in, watching for any sign of Cloud’s face breaking. Such beautiful eyes. So inhuman, but beautiful all the same.</p><p>“Very good.” He whispered, and pushed Cloud’s foreskin back, rubbing his thumb on the tip. There was a very miniscule groan in the back of Cloud’s throat but he stifled it, killed it. His General had to properly discipline him, after all.</p><p>Sephiroth tugged at him a few times, then cradled and massaged his cock so expertly. It felt like he knew just what to do to get him going. Well, why wouldn’t he? They’ve done this before. Probably a lot. Sephiroth must have had this down to a science. Cloud’s toes curled, and he looked down to suppress a guttural moan.</p><p>“Eyes forward, Cadet.”</p><p>He looked up, embarrassed, but willing to take it. Cloud had to be disciplined. This was part of it.</p><p>As soon as Cloud’s muscles started seizing, Sephiroth slowed down and stopped, still holding his cock. Cloud’s eyes drifted up to see a smirk. It took everything in him to fight off thrusting forward (that would break attention) and it took awhile for him to realize how to get this to continue.</p><p>Right, of course. Sephiroth even included <em>that</em> bit. How thorough.</p><p>“P-Permission to come, sir?”</p><p>“What was that?”</p><p>“<em>Sir! Requesting permission to come, sir!</em>” Cloud yelled that, probably loud enough for the neighbors to hear, but he was past caring. Sephiroth pulled him closer, placing Cloud’s head to his bosom and whispering to him.</p><p>“Permission granted, Cadet.” And tugged, and stroked, and rubbed at him so gently to get him going, going faster to build him up. Cloud grunted, smashing his face into his chest. Yeah, they’ve done this, of course they’ve done this.</p><p>“Are you my good boy?” That made Cloud thrust faster, pleasure spiking all the way into his brain. God, he knew just what to say to drive him <em>nuts</em>.</p><p>“Yes, sir! Thank you sir, thank you sir, thank you sir-“ He was stuck on that like a broken record while his muscles seized, and he came right into Sephiroth’s gloved hand, practically melting and leaning against his chest. Kissing his chest and mumbling into it, since he couldn’t reach his face. “I love you sir, I love you sir, I love-“</p><p>“Attention.” Cloud stood at attention once again, ready to command. Sephiroth held up his hand, the one he used for the hand job, that still had cum on it. Cloud didn’t even have to be told. He leaned forward and licked it all off, still coming down off the high of orgasm. He’d lick piss off the bathroom floor at this point, if Sephiroth told him to do it. He was lucky; he thought it would taste weird, and it kind of did, but it was familiar too. Well, duh, he’d done this before. Of course he did!</p><p>“Very good. At ease, Cadet.” Cloud relaxed his stance to see Sephiroth giving that light, easy smile again, the militaristic persona completely gone.</p><p>“How was that? Like you remember?”</p><p>Cloud grabbed Sephiroth’s face, pulling him in, kissing him. Hungrily. Sephiroth let his tongue inside. Cloud bit his lip and moaned.</p><p>“Getting there,” he muttered. “Sit down.”</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>“Sit down.” Cloud pushed him, trying to herd him toward the bed, which did nothing because pushing against Sephiroth was like trying to push a brick wall. He got the hint, though, chuckling. He walked over to the end of the bed and sat, and Cloud knelt at his feet, unzipping his pants.</p><p>Taking out Sephiroth’s semi-hard cock, Cloud kissed it, then licked it, then almost swallowed his hardness, as a thank you to the man he loved for helping set his head straight.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So...this got...long? Can you tell I really like writing dialogue? Oh well! More to read, I guess. Sorry it got a little exposition-y.</p><p>As usual, leave kudos or comments if you're able and you like this! *dabs*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Thursday, Months Later</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"I know what you must be thinking. Have these things always been true? Or have I cursed you?</p><p>Is there such a thing? A curse that changes your past?"</p><p>-Petscop</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cloud woke up bright and early, slipping out of Sephiroth’s arms and trying not to wake him up. It was still dark out, but he managed to quietly slip out of bed and creep over to the bathroom undetected. If he wanted to surprise Sephiroth with breakfast, then he’d have to start early!</p><p>Over time, things started to settle for Cloud again, memories filtering back to him as the days marched on. It was like going through your closet to clean it and finding a bunch of mementos, and you end up sitting around all day going over them. The Costa del Sol trip was as clear as day now; that was a celebratory trip for his (what they assumed at the time) full recovery. They had already been dating for a few months and that was when Sephiroth proposed. Thank God he did it in private. Cloud would have been crying in front of everyone about it for hours otherwise.</p><p>The wedding had to be a mostly private, quiet affair as well, which was one of the drawbacks of dating a celebrity war hero. His mom got to come, though, along with a few other work friends. He invited Tifa, but she never RSVP’d. Mom said that she was busy with martial arts training, but she probably felt awkward about the whole thing. He still hadn’t run into her yet in MIdgar, either, and it was September now. It sucked, but sometimes friends drifted apart like that. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, really. He just wished that he could get in contact with her and invite her up, but he didn’t know where to start. Well, at least Johnny was there for her, right?</p><p>They should see about planning another trip there. Cloud had been planning one for July, but a boat got hijacked by AVALANCHE, so all ports had to close for awhile, which was annoying. He really did sympathize with their ultimate goal, but all their extreme measures just made things worse for everyone. Sephiroth was always home later than usual when an attack or bombing happened too. That sounded selfish, compared to the fate of the Planet, but during those nights, there was always the fear that Sephiroth might be dead. That was impossible; Sephiroth was probably just as hard to kill as he was back in the day. Still, he’d always get so scared. If Cloud could snap his fingers and magically make it so no one had to depend on mako anymore, he’d do it. Too bad it wasn’t that easy.</p><p>Cloud closed his eyes, almost dozing from the warm water of the shower. Too early in the day to think like this. Or to be up in general, but it was too late now. He’d been going over different recipes and practicing his cooking over the past few months, so today he was going to see about making pancakes and eggs. Getting a handle on the pancake batter consistency was really hard at first, but he felt like he had it down by now. It was time to put his skills to the test. He shook off the last of his drowsiness and carried on with his shower. Brushed his teeth. Snuck back out to the bedroom to find some clothes from the drawer, along with the two things that were helping him stave off more “episodes”.</p><p>The first item was a journal. Just in case an episode did happen again, he decided it would be prudent to actually write down what he did every day, and what happened, even if it seemed like they would be memorable events. You could never be too careful, so he recorded the most mundane events, along with recipes, grocery lists, and other tidbits that could be useful. He took it with him everywhere, too.</p><p>Cloud took a lot of precautions with it. This was actually his third journal; he recorded everything in precise, minute detail, usually as soon as it happened.</p><p>Well, okay, maybe not <em>everything.</em> Some of the more…private…stuff was too embarrassing to write about. He’d die if he lost this and somebody found it and read those bits (imagine how much gil <em>that </em>would sell to Sephiroth’s fan club). But almost everything! At least as far as the day’s events went. He even wrote down an introductory page and put one at the beginning of every journal, with <em>READ ME</em> plastered on the front cover. Writing those intro pages was kind of fun too. It was like writing a letter to his past self (which was technically his future self?), and he included everything relevant, just in case an episode got so bad that he forgot even more things. Like this:</p><p>
  <em>Hello,</em>
</p><p><em>Your name is Cloud Strife. You were born on August 11</em> <em> <sup>th</sup> </em> <em>, 1986, in Nibelheim. Your mother is Claudia Strife. You are in Midgar right now. You had mako poisoning and are in recovery so if you are reading this, your memory is acting up. I’m your past self and I’m writing this to help you with your memories.</em></p><p>
  <em>I know this seems scary, but here are some very important things you need to know.</em>
</p><p><em>1)</em>    <em>You used to be in SOLDIER but after the accident, you couldn’t work anymore. You’re still getting workman’s comp from Shinra, though.</em></p><p><em>2)</em>    <em>You live here. This is your house.</em></p><p><em>3)</em>    <em>You and Sephiroth are married (!) You two got married on August 11</em><em><sup>th</sup></em><em>, 0006, on your birthday! Yes, THAT Sephiroth. The one from SOLDIER. Yes, really. That also means you’re gay. It’s fine.</em></p><p><em>4)</em>    <em>This memory lapse is an “episode”. It will go away soon.</em></p><p><em>5)</em>    <em>You’re also friends with Sheila and her family (in the house cattycorner to the right) and Jessie (the clerk at Bogaarts)</em></p><p><em>6)</em>    <em>You have to stay home when you’re like this. Sorry. Read through your journals until the episode passes.</em></p><p>Cloud hadn’t had another episode ever since three months ago, which was a relief, but it never hurt to be prepared. He set his latest journal and a pen to the side while he put on his clothes for the day (real clothes, not loungewear) and got his hair and face situation taken care of. He paused, looking at himself in the mirror. He wasn’t all that sure when he first noticed, but the color was coming back to his cheeks. His eyes didn’t look so tired either, but he couldn’t really place what else had changed aside from his skin having a “glow” to it.</p><p>His cheeks looked a bit chubbier. Cloud pinched one of them, trying to see if he could better tell if that was actually true through touch. Well, even if he were gaining weight, that might have been a good sign. Mom said he’s always been scrawny as a kid. And someone had to eat those “failed” cooking experiments.</p><p>…Maybe he could stand to take up running. Ugh, okay, one thing at a time here. Breakfast first.</p><p>After everything else was in order and things were put in their proper place, Cloud picked up the other thing that was helping him retrain his brain: a black, lamb’s leather collar that he got for his birthday. He unhooked it and slipped it around his neck, sliding the hook where the leash would attach to the back of his neck.</p><p>N-Not that he <em>had</em> a leash, or anything. That wasn’t really the point. He didn’t literally go around pretending to be a dog or whatever. It was just…he liked when Sephiroth told him what to do. Cloud figured that that might help him whenever his thoughts started drifting into “bad” territory. Whenever he’d get the strange feeling things were “off”, or not right, if Sephiroth were around, he could tell him to think of something else, or tell him to do a distracting task, stuff like that. If he wasn’t around, then Cloud could tug on his collar and that would help him focus. The different mental state that kicked in doing that kind of thing was calming, too. He’d even get “treats” for rewards sometimes, but they were just chocolate candies. It wasn’t an everyday thing either, but the collar looked good on him. It looked like an unusually designed choker. Sephiroth said it brought out his eyes.</p><p>Cloud found himself admiring his reflection in the mirror a little longer than normal before chuckling to himself and picking up his journal, throwing the pen in his pocket. He was getting better every day, wasn’t he? It might have been embarrassing, but maybe he should feel proud for going so long withou an incident. Whatever it was they were doing, it seemed to be working.</p><p>Smiling to himself, Cloud snuck out of the bathroom, across the bedroom, and into the kitchen. Time to prove himself with his Breakfast Challenge.</p><p> </p><p>One flour-covered countertop and several dirty bowls and cups later, the Breakfast Challenge was a resounding success. Even if Cloud’s pancakes weren’t exactly like the diner ones, they still looked and smelled good. In his opinion, of course. He was working on the eggs and coffee by the time Sephiroth drifted in.</p><p>“Morning,” Sephiroth gave him a small hug from behind, already dressed and showered. Cloud was working on Sephiroth’s eggs, and over easy was always a little hard to do just right, so he stayed quiet, concentrating on the pan. He could feel Sephiroth looking around and leaning over to look at the plate of pancakes, sniffing it.</p><p>“Special occasion?”</p><p>Cloud shrugged, playing it cool and trying to spoon the oil onto the egg yolks, but they kept slipping when he tilted the pan.</p><p>“Not really. Just wanted to test my skills.”</p><p>“Looks good…” Sephiroth leaned into him, resting his head on top of Cloud’s. His blow-dried hair fell forward in a distracting curtain, smelling like orange zest and bergamot this time. For the most part, Cloud continued to dutifully ignore him, spooning the oil onto the yolks.</p><p>“Tie your hair back if you’re gonna do that.”</p><p>“Well!” The fake offense was followed by light chuckling as Sephiroth stopped leaning on him like he was a counter and went to get his coffee. Cloud was apparently fun to tease, which he normally didn’t mind (Sephiroth calling him cute when he was snippy tended to do that), but this was important to get right. That didn’t stop Sephiroth from trying to guess at Cloud’s ulterior motives, though.</p><p>“Let’s see. It isn’t your birthday or our anniversary.”</p><p>The eggs looked…done? Them being kind of runny was the whole point, but Cloud was always grossed out over the whites around the yolks not getting done properly. Even though these weren’t his eggs. Sephiroth would say they were good no matter what, but he was never sure if he really meant it or if he wanted Cloud to be happy.</p><p>…Well, he’d probably be honest about whether they’re done or not while they were cooking. It’s always good to have an extra pair of eyes when cooking, but Cloud was trying to gauge things by himself. Then again, Sephiroth’s the one who’s gonna eat them. Cloud showed him pan before he went to sit down.</p><p>“Done?”</p><p>“Perfect. Thank you, dear.” Sephiroth got his plate and shoved a couple of pancakes onto it, determined to figure out what this was all for. Gears were visibly turning in his head while Cloud slid the eggs onto the plate.</p><p>“…It isn’t <em>my</em> birthday, is it?”</p><p>He wasn’t that spacey. Sephiroth knew when his birthday was in the same way the average employee knew their ID number: vaguely aware of it but not enough to have  memorized. He never really had traditional birthday celebrations at a kid, so Cloud had to be the one to actually keep track of it so they could do something nice. Finally able to relax a bit, Cloud started on his much easier scrambled eggs.</p><p>“That’s next month.”</p><p>“Ohhh, right.” Hopefully satisfied, Sephiroth dressed up his pancakes and sat down, digging in while Cloud was finishing up. By the time Cloud got to sit down, the other man had inhaled half his breakfast and was finishing his coffee.</p><p>“Mmn. I give up. It isn’t the weekend…you didn’t buy anything expensive…”</p><p>Cloud remained ever silent, sipping his coffee and letting Sephiroth guess fruitlessly about what this was for. Sephiroth suddenly narrowed his eyes at him.</p><p>“…<em>Did</em> you?”</p><p>Cloud turned away, hiding his smirk. He didn’t, but he had his own ways of riling Sephiroth up if he felt like it. If he wanted to read into this way too much, Cloud wasn’t gonna stop him.</p><p>“Is it a new television?”</p><p>Silence. Cloud started on his eggs as calm as could be while he let Sephiroth make more wild guesses.</p><p>“…A new computer?”</p><p>Cloud couldn’t help but snicker behind his mouth but said nothing.</p><p>“A dog.”</p><p>Cloud dropped his fork in surprise. “Grkh. No!”</p><p>“A <em>robot</em> dog.”</p><p>“I didn’t get anything! Geez.” He picked up his fork again and went for a pancake, his cool façade having been broken. Sephiroth stabbed at the last of his pancakes and let it hang on his fork, still thinking.</p><p>“Just because, then?”</p><p>“Well…yeah. Can’t I do something nice just because?” Sephiroth slowly nodded at that, studying the fruits of Cloud’s labor hanging on his fork.</p><p>“You can. They’re very good, Cloud.” Cloud smiled at that but had to look down at the table. He could feel Sephiroth looking at him, but he didn’t want to get super emotional before Sephiroth had to go to work.</p><p>“I…wanted to return the favor, I guess.” Sephiroth shouldn’t have to be a caretaker for the rest of their lives. If Cloud wanted a full recovery, he should be able to support Sephiroth just as much. Since he couldn’t go back to work for awhile, doing “househusband” stuff was close enough.</p><p>Instead of arguing that there wasn’t a “favor” to return, Sephiroth leaned forward and gave him a syrupy kiss.</p><p>“It’s delicious. You did a good job.” Warmth spread in his stomach and he smiled against Sephiroth’s mouth, kissing him back. Even Cloud could admit that he needed to hear that from him.</p><p>“Thanks.”</p><p>“Love you.”</p><p>“Mmn.” Cloud kissed him again, pushing his tongue inside his husband’s mouth and wrapping his arms around his shoulders. The warmth spread. He leaned forward and out of his chair, but Sephiroth reached forward and tugged on the leash hook on his collar, pulling him off. The tug made Cloud’s mind shift and his arms fell to his sides, anticipating a command.</p><p>“Sit.”</p><p>Cloud sat down immediately, staring at him. Waiting, hyper aware of his presence, his voice. The command alone gave his skin tingles.</p><p>“Good boy.” Sephiroth stroked his face and the side of his head, which wasn’t exactly chocolate, but it was enough of a reward to clear his head.</p><p>“I need to go, but we’ll continue later, okay?”</p><p>Cloud nodded and leaned into Sephiroth’s hand, turning a little red from the stimulation, but feeling content all the same. By the time they were finished and Sephiroth left for work, Cloud fell back into his mundane routine again, going about his day like an other but in a lighter mood now that the Breakfast Challenge was a success.</p><p> </p><p>It was a pretty lazy rest of the day so when afternoon rolled around, Cloud took a walk around the block for some fresh air. It was almost fall, but that didn’t have the exact same meaning in Midgar as it did Nibelheim. Even when winter rolled around, it was always a little warm here, and there were noticeable voids in the atmosphere. Like the lack of plant life meant no heady scents of flowers or plant oils wafting in the summer heat, or the lack of insects and birds brought about an eerie quietness when you were far enough from the city center. That’s what happened when you lived on a metal plate 300 kilometers above ground; you had to deal with a certain level of artificiality. It’s something you had to get used to, but Cloud was a country boy to the end, so it was always a little noticeable. At least his walks were nice this time of year, when it was cooler out.</p><p>It was nice out, but the birds weren’t singing. The cicadas weren’t buzzing all summer either, because they left. Everything wild around Midgar was retreating, as if in fear.</p><p>Cloud tugged at his collar as he was walking back home, checking the mail before heading inside. Any bills they had were through Shinra, so expenses were taken from paychecks. Everything else was from Shinra-approved affiliates like stores, but nobody received actual bills in the mail. They’d get letters or ads sometimes, though, so it was still important to check.</p><p>Let’s see…ad, ad, and a card in a golden envelope. It just said “CLOUD STRIFE” on the front of it, with no sender or return address. That was…weird? He could feel something else in there with the card, so he waited until he was inside to open it. It was a little odd, but exciting! Maybe it was from someone he knew? The mail was handled by Shinra too, so it wasn’t like they needed to put your address on mail. It only made things faster. Still, the lack of a sender was curious.</p><p>Cloud stepped inside and dropped the ad flyers onto the table, tearing open the envelope and pulling out the card. It was a bright golden as well, and the front said, “HI!”, in a fancy black font. He couldn’t help but smile a little at it, even though this whole thing didn’t stop being strange. The card felt really friendly, and whatever else was inside was in the card, so he opened it. Maybe it was a late birthday card. He hoped there was at least a name in there too.</p><p>There was a flower inside.</p><p>Wow. Weird, he was just thinking about how rare plants were here, and a flower was sent to him. Cloud took it out, studying it carefully. It still looked pretty healthy and sprang back to its fullness after being squished in a card. It was a bright yellow and, he wasn’t good with flower names, but it looked like some kind of day lily. Cool. Maybe this was an ad for a flower shop, but sending people samples through the mail was a smart way to get people’s attention. He looked at the envelope again, but there wasn’t a sender. Just CLOUD STRIFE.</p><p>A little weird that it was just to him and not both people living here, now that he thought about it. So it couldn’t be an ad, right? Cloud plopped onto the couch and looked at the inside of the card.</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Hey there!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sorry I missed your birthday. Happy 21<sup>st</sup>!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You should check the closet in the study. There’s something special for you there.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>See you soon! </em>
</p><p>
  <em>=D</em>
</p><p> </p><p>…What? The study closet? The office used to be a bedroom, sure, so it did have a closet, but nobody used it. There wasn’t a name inside the card either. What kind of fucking message was this? Cloud opened his book and wrote the message down, with how unusual it all was, along with the fact that it came with the flower. Mysterious note. As he finished writing it at the bottom of the page, one question stuck out to him.</p><p>How did they know the bedroom was a study now?</p><p>An icy pit starting forming in Cloud’s stomach. He picked up the flower again and sniffed at it. It had a real, almost subtle floral scent. It couldn’t be fake, right? This was a real flower he was holding in his hand. He couldn’t…be hallucinating it, right? He could touch, and smell, and see it, so of course it was there. It wasn’t fake, but it must have been rare, still. Plants were more rare than gold in Midgar, so whoever sent this must have had pretty high up connections. And they knew who he was. They knew his birthday. They knew his age. Either this was all true, or this was a much more intense hallucination than last time.</p><p>Cloud sniffed at the flower again and his stomach tied into knots. He had tears in his eyes that he couldn’t explain, so he put the flower and card back in the envelope so he couldn’t look at them anymore.</p><p>What did this mean? What was in the closet?</p><p>Cloud could come and go in the office as he pleased, but it was mainly Sephiroth’s area. Was there something hidden in there?</p><p>Was Sephiroth hiding something?</p><p>
  <em>Help me.</em>
</p><p>Cloud tugged at his collar, over and over, breathing deeply and trying to clear his head. The tears fell regardless.</p><p>Sephiroth wouldn’t do that. He had to trust him. They loved each other so much. He could help Cloud fix this. It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay. Sephiroth would come home and confirm if the card and flower were real, which would take care of that, and then they’d go from there. Tug. Tug. Tug. He practically melted onto the couch and breathed out a sigh of relief as his mind leveled out and his pulse dropped back to normal. As he started to sit up and stretch, he could hear someone coming up the steps. Perfect timing. The two of them would get this out of the way and then they could get on with the rest of the evening.</p><p>As Sephiroth opened the door and stepped inside, Cloud took the card and flower out, picking up the flower and holding it out to him. First thing’s first, this would be a good way to confirm the thing was real without outright asking.</p><p>“I’m home-oh.” Sephiroth perked up at the flower and took it. “For me? Thank you…” Okay, good. Most of the reason why Sephiroth being around was useful was just because having another person confirm the reality around you was more than enough. So the flower was real. Sephiroth took off his shoes and slid onto the couch, looking at the card. He put the flower in his shirt pocket.</p><p>“Someone sent you a flower?”</p><p>“I guess…can you read this and see what it says?”</p><p>Sephiroth narrowed his eyes in mild confusion.</p><p>“… Please tell me you didn’t forget how to read.”</p><p>“No, I…I need to confirm what it says.” Cloud showed him the back of his collar as well, as an invitation to take control. It was a wordless way of saying that an Attack might be coming. Sephiroth took the card in one hand and looped his finger through the leash ring with the other, giving it a good, powerful tug. Firm but it wasn’t a chokehold either, just a nice gentle pressure. Cloud sighed in bliss.</p><p>“Lie down.” He did, laying his head in Sephiroth’s lap, and the other man took his hand off the collar and started petting his hair and scalp, saying “There’s my good boy,” so softly to him. By the time he got to the card, Cloud’s eyes were barely open. He could stay here for hours.</p><p>“That’s…odd.” Sephiroth finally said. Cloud looked up at him in a daze, almost completely forgetting about what the card said before it snapped back to him suddenly.</p><p>“The thing about the closet?”</p><p>“Yes…” He squinted at card a bit, trying to read something.</p><p>“…Equals D?” Equals D…what did that-oh wait, Cloud remembered now.</p><p>“I think that’s a smilie face?”</p><p>“Oh!” Sephiroth turned the card on its side and nodded. “I see. How clever…” Hah, sometimes Sephiroth came across as such an old man.</p><p>“So they’re real?”</p><p>“Oh, yes. This was for you?” Cloud nodded, a lot calmer than earlier, even if he knew this was all so strange.</p><p>“You don’t know who sent it?” Cloud shook his head, still a little weirded out by that, until Sephiroth started petting his head again, and it all melted away. Like fog in the sun.</p><p>“They knew my birthday…”</p><p>“Hmm…probably someone at work pulling your leg. All our information is in the database.” Oh, of course. That made sense. Yeah, someone was probably just messing with him.</p><p>
  <em>What about the study?</em>
</p><p>What <em>about</em> the study?</p><p>
  <em>How did they know about it?</em>
</p><p>If it’s someone from work, they probably knew Sephiroth. They might have known that he had to work from home sometimes because of Cloud. They probably knew that Cloud would get the mail to.</p><p>
  <em>But the flower…</em>
</p><p>What about it?</p><p>
  <em>Isn’t it…familiar?</em>
</p><p>Cloud rolled over onto his stomach, showing Sephiroth the collar, and the other man reached down and tugged up, soothing him, readying him for commands and getting rid of that pesky voice.</p><p>“It’s worrying you that much?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“I guess we’ll pick up where we left off, then. Up.” Cloud sat up, following Sephiroth’s gentle pulling.</p><p>“Stay.” Sephiroth unhooked his finger and got up, going to get something. Probably the “treats”. Him being gone didn’t bother Cloud in the least this time. He could sit here for hours at a time when he was like this, not that Sephiroth would leave him there for that long. Only minutes passed until Sephiroth came back with the bag of candies, shaking it to get Cloud’s attention.</p><p>“There we go. Good boy.” He held out a candy to Cloud, who ate it right out of his hand. Sephiroth ran his fingers through his hair and everything was going to be okay.</p><p>“We’ll get rid of this pesky thing and then have some fun, won’t we?” Cloud nodded, a serene smile on his face. Sephiroth picked up the card and held it in front of him. Cloud couldn’t take his eyes off his hand, ready for the next command.</p><p>“If this doesn’t have a sender, it’s junk mail.” Cloud nodded, taking in everything he said. Practically burning it into his heart like a brand.</p><p>“What’s this, Cloud?”</p><p>“Junk mail.”</p><p>“Repeat that.”</p><p>“Junk mail.”</p><p>“Good.” Sephiroth held out another treat for Cloud and he ate it right out of his hand. He was such a good boy. He was ready to do so much more for Sephiroth but this came first.</p><p>“Can you tell me what we do with junk mail, Cloud?”</p><p>“We shred it.”</p><p>“Repeat that.”</p><p>“We <em>shred</em> it,” Cloud repeated, the excitement in his voice barely containable. He had to hug himself to keep everything together. There was another treat tossed into the air and he caught it in his mouth in one try.</p><p>“Very good. Now, Cloud,” Sephiroth handed him the card. He had a loving smile on his face, full of warmth, but there was a light in his eyes that Cloud couldn’t place. Not that it mattered. Not that he cared. “Can you destroy this for me? Rip it up right now.”</p><p>Cloud grabbed it and tore it to shreds. He did it with such force and fervent energy that paper scraps flew everywhere, like confetti. He did such a good job. Sephiroth must have been so proud of him, because his smile widened into a grin.</p><p>“Wonderful.” One more treat was thrown his way, caught in his mouth. “Now, one more thing.” Sephiroth patted his lap, which was a command to sit on it. Cloud crawled over and straddled his husband, clinging to him and leaning in very close. Sephiroth took one more chocolate and put it against his lips, which meant this was important. That was their “chocolate kiss”, which he probably would have cringed to death at when he was less mature. But things were different now.</p><p>“Cloud. Forget the note, okay?” Oh, that was a gimme. Cloud couldn’t literally erase it from his mind, so Sephiroth was probably kidding. This was just free chocolate at this point.</p><p>“Haha, what note?”</p><p>“Good boy.” Sephiroth put the candy between his lips and Cloud leaned forward, kissing him and taking it for himself. They stayed in each other’s arms, letting their tongues mingle. Sephiroth nibbled on Cloud’s lip, as if savoring his taste, before reaching over and pulling him off by the collar. Cloud let him, ready to obey any more commands. He was getting uncomfortably hard, but he had to be a good boy and wait. <em>Sephiroth’s</em> good boy.</p><p>Sephiroth reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a tube. On closer inspection, it was lube, although Cloud was a little too riled to fully process what was happening. Sephiroth pulled on his collar again and he focused, staring at his husband with half-lidded eyes.</p><p>“Stay.” Cloud stayed, and waited while Sephiroth freed his other hand from the collar and started unbuttoning his shirt.</p><p>“Daddy had such a long day at work. Can my good boy-“ His pecs flexed and Cloud almost made a beeline for them before Sephiroth grabbed his shoulders and held him back. “Not yet. <em>Stay.</em>” The command was louder, firmer, and Cloud complied immediately. He was at full mast and panting, agonizing over it, but he had to wait. He had to be good.</p><p>“Can Cloud take care of me tonight?” Once it was clear that Cloud wouldn’t move, Sephiroth picked the bottle of lube back up and handed it to him. “Make me come and I’ll order in. Then we can take a bath together.” He lay down and started slipping his pants and underwear off, throwing them to the side. He spread his legs out and started stroking his already half-hard cock, and Cloud still stayed put. Not yet. Not until Sephiroth gave the go-ahead.</p><p>“Do a good job and I’ll stay home tomorrow. I’m ready when you are, <em>Cloud.</em>”</p><p>Cloud almost literally ripped off his clothes with how eager he was. Sephiroth had to help him with his pants but once that was out of the way, Cloud slathered his dick in lube, stroking it while trying not to just come right there. That had happened more than once, so he needed to do things just right. He covered one of his fingers in lube and stuck it inside Sephiroth, who let out a moan immediately.</p><p>“That’s it.” That cock was right in front of his face. It took all of Cloud’s remaining willpower to not choke himself on it but he had to take care of this first. When he made sure at least some lube got in there, Cloud lifted his husband’s hips and entered him, greeted with a warm embrace. He’d done this before, and Sephiroth always insisted he go hard, but Cloud always had to ease himself into it. Sephiroth clenched around him and he was electrified. He thrust forward, trying to get more of Cloud inside him. His abs rippled and Cloud couldn’t help but stare into them in a calm daze.</p><p>“Go.” That snapped Cloud out of his daze and he started, and soon Sephiroth started calling his name, then screaming it, then moaning wordlessly while he squirmed under Cloud and his toes curled. Cloud could never tell if he was actually doing this right or if half of Sephiroth’s arousal was from Cloud alone, but at a certain point it didn’t matter, so he stopped worrying about it. He just focused on how Sephiroth’s muscles curved and jolted for him, and how his head was thrown back in pure bliss. Soon, Sephiroth started to twist and clench, and he grabbed one of the couch pillows and screamed into it, coming all over himself and making Cloud speed up until he came inside him. When he did, he blanked and there was a pleasant ringing in his head, followed by a nice, calm void.</p><p>As soon as Cloud couldn’t stay inside him any longer he dismounted, falling to the other side of the couch and just letting himself lie there. By the time he raised his head up again to look around, Sephiroth wasn’t doing much. He just lay there with the pillow on his face, shirt open and dick out. He had a yellow flower in his shirt pocket that he hadn’t noticed before. Cloud briefly wondered if he got that at work and crawled over, having the urge to clean him up, but Sephiroth finally moved, stumbling away from the couch and towards his pants, where his phone was.</p><p>“Hello. Just letting you know I’m taking time off tomorrow.” When that was done, Sephiroth hobbled over to Cloud, petting his hair and kissing him.</p><p>“Right. Playtime’s over. Now, who wants takeout?”</p><p>After they cleaned themselves up a little, Cloud decided to put the couch cover in the wash while they waited. He was a little confused about where the torn up paper came from, but he just put the scraps in the trash. Must have been there when he came inside.</p><p>For days after that, they kept getting these weird cards in the mail too, but Cloud knew what to do. It was probably junk mail, so every time he got one, he’d take it and put it in the shredder. Each and every one, every single day, until they stopped coming for good.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I am an evil, evil man and I am deeply sorry.</p><p>Thanks to PureStream for taking a look at the beginning. As usual, let me know what you think if you want to. You can scream at me, but God won't hear you.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Friday, One Month Later</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Since when were his eyes green, anyway?</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Friday, October 12<sup>th</sup>, 0007</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>7:00 AM</strong>
</p><p>Cloud woke up and slipped out of bed, starting his day like any other. This was going to be a special weekend, though. Today was Grocery Day, and tomorrow was Sephiroth’s birthday. Normally, they would go out for a night on the town for that kind of thing, but Cloud wanted to prepare something special this time. He had graduated to “semi-complicated main courses” and wanted to try his hand at something fancy. Maybe he’d see if he could pull off a roast with some sides. He’d probably have to get a store-bought cake too, but that would be okay. He came so far over these past few months, and he was only getting better! And Sephiroth’s done nothing but support him along the way…</p><p>He stayed in the shower for a little longer this time, managing to enjoy the steam and the smell of the soap without actually rushing. Cloud wasn’t tired, and he wasn’t falling asleep in the shower or anything. His head was just really calm and still, and the feeling of washing his hair or the soap going down his skin felt really good. Like he was actually paying attention to it this time? It grounded him. He could already tell that this day was going to go great. Tomorrow might be even better! It had better be, with all the planning and preparation he’d have to do.</p><p>Once out of the shower, Cloud took a look in the mirror while he was drying himself off. Hmm. Not bad! It was always hard to tell with gradual changes, but the tiredness in his eyes were gone.</p><p>
  <em>…Since when were they green?</em>
</p><p>Hmm, well. Must be the mako. Maybe? They looked nice, so he wasn’t gonna complain.</p><p>Cloud brushed his teeth and got on with the rest of his morning ritual, fetching his clothes, doing his hair. Putting his collar on. As time went on, he didn’t have to pull on it as much. His mind was settling, and those freak outs felt like such a long time ago. It felt like they were from a completely different world. Like he was a different person, although it was hard to cast his mind back and picture that. It’s so strange how your brain can just malfunction like that and you become someone else. And when you’re all better, it melts away, like snow in the spring, and you’re <em>you</em> again.</p><p>Even if he does slip up in the future, Cloud will be in good hands. And he’ll go back to normal, and life will continue like it always has. His ring was proof of that. By now, it felt like it was a part of his body, like he’d been wearing it for years.</p><p>Sighing in contentment, Cloud gave one last full body stretch before heading out to the kitchen to start the day. The days didn’t get all that shorter like they did in the mountains, so a bright sunrise was there to greet him in the kitchen window.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>10: 00 AM</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Now that the husband was, gone, the real secret mission could begin. First was the groceries. Cloud’s last journal was filling up too, so he might as well get another book while he was out and about.</p><p>Sephiroth was more of an “experience” person than a “present” person, so that was what his birthday “presents” (or any presents) usually were: going to the theater, going to resorts, spa days. He still never really talked about his childhood much, but from what he did say, it sounded like a sheltered life. Apparently he never went out that much in his early 20’s. Well, Sephiroth was a celebrity, and even technically “created”, wasn’t he? Even if he did have real human parents, he probably wasn’t expected to live like a normal person. Not like this, anyway. That was the thing of it: it wasn’t that Sephiroth didn’t like talking about himself, it’s that he couldn’t. This new life was him starting over from scratch, just like Cloud after the “incident”.</p><p>The two of them had this deal where they had specific roles for each other, at least for presents. Sephiroth would be the one to buy Cloud things, like special gifts, since Cloud had more “humble origins” (Sephiroth’s words), and Cloud was in charge of the experiences, since Sephiroth was more sheltered.</p><p>This weekend was going to be extra special, then. Instead of going out, Sephiroth would have Cloud all to himself. Just the two of them all weekend, alone together, and he’d wait on Sephiroth hand and foot.</p><p>He’d probably insist that it wasn’t needed, but Cloud knew better. It was fuzzy, but he had these bits and snatches of memories from when he was comatose. Someone who was feeding him, someone who was helping him walk and move his muscles. Someone talking to him, although it was still hard to catch the words in his memory. That had to be Sephiroth, right? His hero, always there for him in his time of need.</p><p>This was a secret mission because Sephiroth was bound to feel embarrassed by Cloud trying to return the favor, but that was why it had to be a birthday thing, too. If he could see how good of a job Cloud was doing, maybe it could be a forever kind of thing. Then he’d let Cloud take care of him more often.</p><p>Just the thought of it gave Cloud goosebumps. A full weekend of doing whatever Sephiroth wanted. Fulfilling his every desire…</p><p>Ahhh, okay! Grocery time. One step at a time here!</p><p>The walk to the store wasn’t that much trouble. Most Shinra employees never liked going into the main part of the city unless they had to, so some stores were set up closer to the residential areas. There was gonna be some more stuff than usual this time, but Cloud couldn’t drive because…you know. He <em>could</em> just suddenly not know where he was, so he’d rather not risk it. Not like he couldn’t carry it all back with him on a walk; it would just be more annoying than anything else.</p><p>Okay, so, gameplan: get a roast, get sides, cake, milk and eggs, maybe some extra fruit or veggies if they still had some. That was always a bit of a gamble, and they had to be rationed, but freezing and stretching them out was always an option. Less plants, less pollinators…</p><p>Oh right, a new journal, couldn’t forget that. And…if Jessie was working, maybe he should avoid her. Not that Cloud didn’t like talking with her but if she caught him, he’d be stuck there for another two hours, and he needed to get other things done today. Well…it wouldn’t kill him to stick around either, maybe. Sometimes, it felt like Jessie had no one else to talk to, so she’d corner Cloud and talk his ear off.</p><p>
  <em>No one else to talk to?</em>
</p><p>Haven’t really seen her with anyone else, right?</p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p>Grabbing his keys and wallet, Cloud walked outside and headed to the store. Nice and sunny out, at the perfect temperature, but again, no birds. No insects. Most people were at work by now, and it was deathly still and quiet out. It still smelled like concrete and plastic.</p><p>Even if the world were ending, Cloud might as well make the most of it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>Afternoon</strong>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Lunch: Eaten</p><p>New Journal: Got it</p><p>Groceries: Paid for</p><p>Jessie: Avoided (for now)</p><p>For the past couple of hours, Cloud had been trying to tidy up as well, after he put the groceries away. It worked for a little while, when he was cleaning up the kitchen, but once he got to the bedroom and found his old journals, he couldn’t help but lay in bed and read through them again. The more often he could place that something did happen, the more accomplished he felt. It gave him a nice soothing feeling, of being able to track events in the proper order. And that one major freak out, with the TV talking to him, only happened once. Maybe that <em>was</em> the mako finally leaving his body. It being a fluke was probably a good sign.</p><p>The more he read, the more he</p><p>
  <em>No one ever stops by. Have you noticed that? You always have to go to them.</em>
</p><p>…Well. Sephiroth was always really private. Cloud understood that. What if some random person came over and stole his underwear or something? Weird fans were still a thing. People like Jessie probably didn’t want to come off that way. By the third journal, he <em>did</em> notice that pattern, but there was nothing for it.</p><p>Of course it was odd, but they had an odd enough life, didn’t they? So people were a little too intimidated to come over. It wasn’t like Cloud couldn’t leave the house.</p><p>
  <em>Can’t you?</em>
</p><p>Cloud tugged on his collar again. Go away. Let him reminisce in peace. He’d stick his face in Sephiroth’s pillow again, but that would make him stop reading and start doing…other things. Let him at least finish this first.</p><p>Most of what he wrote down was kind of tedious, though, he had to admit. Lots of staying at home with occasional vacation plans that had to be cancelled. Unfortunately, Cloud’s journaling didn’t go further back than three months, so he couldn’t have those older memories as keepsakes. Never too late to start that, though. Three months’ worth of recorded memories was better than nothing. Here’s a grocery list. There random thoughts. He was skimming a little by the time he got to the second half of the last journal, thoughts drifting again.</p><p>
  <em>Not even Jessie thought about coming over? It’s not like she doesn’t know where you live.</em>
</p><p>Jessie might have been a little heavy-handed sometimes, but she’d never seriously impose like that. Besides, Cloud’s been to her parents’ place before. It wasn’t like they never talked.</p><p>
  <em>Not even Tifa?</em>
</p><p>…Tifa. He still hadn’t heard from her yet. You’d think Mom would have told her where he was by now. But people living in the slums couldn’t get up here that easily either. Both literally and figuratively. It always gave Cloud a skin-crawly, uncanny feeling, thinking about how people could just luck out like that. If things turned out different, he’d probably be stuck down there too, doing who knows what, just to survive. Like two different worlds.</p><p>
  <em>Isn’t that strange?</em>
</p><p>Cloud kept reading. Another list, another mundane task written down, another day at home. He’d like to actually go to Costa del Sol again and actually record things the next time, so he could recall things easier. If he didn’t, it felt like his mind could slip through his fingers at any second. All these things happened. They were physical, on the paper and everything, instead of just abstract thoughts or memories. They may have been tedious to read through again, but the repetition of it was calming, in a way. It drowned out everything else. Let’s see.</p><p>Another spate of random thoughts, trying out pancakes, doing chores around the house, a walk. A card.</p><p>A card?</p><p>…He didn’t remember a card. Mail wasn’t all that noteworthy, but apparently this was. There wasn’t a sender, but it had a flower in it, and the message.</p><p>
  <em>Check the study closet.</em>
</p><p>…Creepy. Cloud flipped ahead to see what happened next but there was nothing. At least nothing related to the message? It ended with “I’ll ask Sephiroth when he comes home,” but that never happened. He checked the date again, then tried to think to what happened. It was a Thursday…he was trying out pancakes and eggs that day, and Sephiroth stayed home the next day and they kind of….fooled around. Cloud looked for anything else about a flower but the only thing close enough was, “I wonder where Sephiroth got that flower?” Right after that thing about the note.</p><p>People rarely got flowers in Midgar, so Cloud could remember it pretty well. Sephiroth was wearing it in his shirt pocket the day after, too. It was a golden yellow, and almost like a day lily. He looked at the flower’s description, from the note.</p><p>
  <em>Muted yellow, kind of like a day lily.</em>
</p><p>…His stomach twisted, again.</p><p>What did this mean?</p><p>Cloud read the message again, then looked through the next few pages, just to be sure. It was such a strange note that he had to write it down, but there wasn’t any follow up. Any other mail was just junk mail he didn’t even open before shredding. It never came up again. He didn’t even ask Sephiroth about it, even though the flower he had was clearly the same one. So it had to have been real, right?</p><p>How did he forget?</p><p>Cloud had a sudden, desperate urge to put the journal down and forget the whole thing. He almost did, too. He lay down on Sephiroth’s pillow, clutching his journal and taking in the scent of Sephiroth’s shampoo. He didn’t forget. His memory wasn’t getting bad again. It just wasn’t important. Cloud closed his eyes and snuggled in, burying his face in the pillow and sticking his hand down his pants.</p><p>It was just one thing. It wasn’t the end of the world. It wasn’t a big deal. If he forgot something, it wasn’t important. The note wasn’t important. Cloud started touching himself. Pleasure spread through his body, like he was dunked in a warm, welcoming bath. He breathed Sephiroth in and his skin prickled. This was such a natural way to self-soothe at this point that he didn’t even think twice about it. It wasn’t important.</p><p>Forget the note and be happy. Forget. Forget. Pleasure jolted through his muscles and he moaned into the pillow. Forget. As he was building toward orgasm, in the quiet afternoon, his head started to pleasantly ring and he continued, as if in a trance. Forget. Forget. Forget.</p><p>
  <em>I wonder what’s in there.</em>
</p><p>Cloud stopped, along with the ringing, and he lay there with that thought bouncing around in his head. It was over a minute before he came back to himself again and realized that he was holding his dick. <em>And </em>his journal. He was supposed to be cleaning up the house, so what was he…<em>right. </em>The note! He was so busy freaking out about it, he didn’t even consider what was in the study closet.</p><p>It could be nothing… If this were a joke, then the worst case scenario would be that nothing’s in there.</p><p>But what if something <em>was</em> in there? That he didn’t know about? Well… This was Cloud’s home too, wasn’t it? He lived here! Shouldn’t he know where things were? There could be some important documents in there! What would happen is Sephiroth got caught in a bombing incident and was incapacitated? Cloud would have to know where everything was, even Sephiroth’s private stuff. Documentation, life insurance stuff…gosh. The more he thought about it, the more just going over to check was a win-win situation. If nothing was there, he’d only waste a couple of minutes. If something <em>was </em>in there that he didn’t know about, it was better to know, wasn’t it?</p><p>Like, what could Sephiroth possibly be hiding in there? A dead body? Surely not.</p><p>It wasn’t like he was forbidden from looking, either. Cloud could go in there at any time and check, and if it was a messy closet, he could start cleaning it. If anything looked really private, he’d leave it alone. They’re partners! Sephiroth could trust him with this.</p><p>They<em> had </em>to trust each other, or else what was the point of it all?</p><p>Two minutes. That’s all he needed to check, then he could move on to something else.</p><p>As Cloud got up and put his dick away, his mind cleared. The more he thought about it, as he wandered over from the bedroom to the study, the stranger it was. It <em>was</em> a little odd that he genuinely didn’t know if anything was in the spare closet. He’d been living here for over a year now, but even though most of his memories were back, he was drawing a blank for this specific area of the house. It probably wasn’t that important, but it was the same as the note: just weirdly specific blank spots. It was like something scrubbed out specific parts of his brain, but memories weren’t supposed to work like that. Especially not for mundane things like this.</p><p>Cloud opened the door and walked into the study. It was quiet and warm, with the scent of leather-bound books and cologne blanketing the entire room. He was overcome with such a warm, safe sleepiness that he had a strange urge to sit in the chair and doze. This place…it smelled like him. Sephiroth must have been in here a lot because he could feel his essence in it, more than even the bedroom that they shared. Cloud was wrapped in it like a warm blanket, and got hard again. Oh, his darling…</p><p>He started touching himself right there, and only stopped when his stomach dropped, after he forgot why he was in here for a split second. Right, the closet. Sheesh! What was <em>with</em> him today? They’d have to start their weekend early at this rate. Then Sephiroth could properly…discipline him. Maybe if he jacked off in here, he could be disciplined even harder-</p><p>Okay, <em>no.</em> Good God. Closet first. Being disciplined by Daddy would be later. If things would even come to that.</p><p>Cloud scanned the room for any extra doors, and it didn’t take long until he found them. Just a regular, sliding wooden closet door next to one of the book cases. Perfectly ordinary.</p><p>As he reached out to open the door, his hand shook and his heart leapt into his throat. This whole thing was so fucking silly. What did he have to be nervous about? He was nervous because he built all this up in his head, but it was probably something totally mundane. Watch, he’ll open the door.</p><p>Cloud took a deep breath and slid the door open. Only a couple of things caught his eye, so there wasn’t even all that much in here.</p><p>The first thing was on a hanger, and the closer he looked at it, he realized that it was his old SOLDIER uniform. See, there was the sweater, the guard, the pants. He checked out one of the pockets and even found some materia stuffed in there. Cloud took out a couple and spun them around in his hand. Man. Was he the only person on the Planet who had this weird urge to put one of them in his mouth? Materia always looked like big, gummy candies.</p><p>Right, so it turned out a closet had clothes in it. Wow. Yes, <em>very </em>world-ending revelation there.</p><p>
  <em>Those are the only clothes here, though.</em>
</p><p>…Yeah. When you thought about it like that, it <em>was </em>a little weird. Cloud grabbed at the shirt and pulled it closer. It was like nothing changed. It even had the weird, uneven pauldron that was obviously his. Ever since…</p><p>
  <em>Since when?</em>
</p><p>Since Nibelheim. Obviously.</p><p>
  <em>You had that materia in Nibelheim?</em>
</p><p>…<em>Did</em> he?</p><p>Cloud looked at the materia in his other hand again. Since it was crystalized knowledge from the Planet, materia was very convenient to analyze because it always told you what it was. “Told” wasn’t quite right, though. It was more like you could hold it in your hand and just knew what it was. One of them was a summon, Ifrit. The other was a yellow materia, Assess.</p><p>He didn’t…<em>have</em> these in Nibelheim. He was sure of it. Cloud checked the pockets for more and saw more materia lining the pockets. He didn’t have these until…</p><p>
  <em>Until…?</em>
</p><p>Cloud’s mind felt like it was splitting. He tried to cast his mind back, to a few months ago, to see where he got these. Jessie gave him the Ifrit summon. But…not Jessie, not the shy nerdy girl who he saw at work. Jessie, the AVALANCHE member. The one working for Barret, with Biggs and Wedge, <em>she</em> gave him that. There was this whole thing where they had to go to her parents’ house to get a keycard. <em>That’s</em> what this place reminded him of, at first.</p><p>And the Assess materia was from that weird Chadley kid. There was this whole thing where they had to use it to analyze enemies, and he and Tifa had to fight-</p><p>Tifa! <em>Fuck!</em> Of <em>course</em> he ran into Tifa. Cloud ran into her when he first came to Midgar! This whole thing with AVALANCHE was because she insisted on it.</p><p>But all of that overlapped with his time here. The more he cast his mind back, the more his memories branched, until two completely different scenarios played out. In one of them, Sephiroth was still angry, and marched over to the Nibelheim reactor, ready to see his “mother”. He was ignoring pretty much everyone until the reactor, then Cloud caught up and tried to reason with him. One thing led to another and Cloud…fell…into the Lifestream. That must have brought Sephiroth to his senses, because they sent out a rescue team for him, although he obviously wouldn’t remember that. Then he woke up here.</p><p>The other…was too horrible to think about. So much death and carnage, and Sephiroth seemed like he was reveling in it. That couldn’t be right. Sephiroth could never…</p><p>But then…what was all this? All these new memories locked away, all of them stored <em>here.</em> That had to be what this was, right? These were <em>his</em> materia. He could tell that his experiences were etched into them. He didn’t have them in Nibelheim…but he did have them in Midgar. There was that weird gap, still, but that was the case for both sets of memories. They had that one thing in common. No wonder the mystery person wanted him to check here. What could they…</p><p>The flower.</p><p>The <em>flower.</em></p><p>Cloud gasped and dropped the materia he was holding. Oh God.</p><p>
  <em>Aerith.</em>
</p><p>It had to be her. Those flowers were <em>hers.</em> And she guided him here. She <em>knew.</em> Everyone tried to tell him, but Aerith knew where everything was. This was the quickest, easiest way to unlock everything. And he thought the notes were junk mail. He shredded them without even thinking.</p><p>Tears were streaming down his face by the time he noticed the second thing, and he couldn’t help but stare at it in a stupid daze. The second thing was a wide broadsword. More of a sheet of metal than an actual sword, but a sword all the time. In the center, next to the hilt, were two connected holes. Materia slots.</p><p>The Buster sword was here. His sword…was right here. Cloud made a small, strained noise and stepped forward to get it, and he suddenly remembered when he first came here. When he looked in the bathroom mirror and the Buster sword was missing. <em>That</em> was what was wrong. Of course. How could he have forgotten such a simple thing? Was his memory really that awful, where he could just up and forget something so important?</p><p>
  <em>Forget his legacy?</em>
</p><p>The floorboard creaked. Cloud stopped, and turned, and his stomach did a freefall into the Planet itself.</p><p>Sephiroth was standing in the doorway. Cloud was so busy, he didn’t even hear him come in.</p><p>He wasn’t some monster who burned down his village. He wasn’t some undead thing coming back to haunt him. He wasn’t even standing there and letting out an evil cackle, or saying, “Aha, curses! My plans were foiled!” He was just Sephiroth, his husband. Standing in the doorway and eyeing him curiously.</p><p>Cloud was suddenly aware of the ring on his hand, and it made his whole arm feel heavy.</p><p>“Hey,” Sephiroth said very gently, like he didn’t have Cloud’s other life stored in his closet. Like some kind of tasteful, understated shrine.</p><p>“H…hey,” Cloud said, hesitating, like he was trying to hide that two different sets of memories were battling it out in his head and definitely failing. It must have been past five. Time sure flew when you were in the middle of an existential crisis.</p><p>Cloud just stood there, frozen, while Sephiroth drifted into the room and bent over to pick up the materia he dropped. He stared at what he had in his hand, then turned to look at the closet, before looking back at Cloud with the most serene, unbothered look on his face.</p><p>“What do we have here?” It sounded like he was going to finish that question with something like “champ” but left it unsaid, and it gave Cloud the sudden urge to hiss and spit at him. It was just now hitting him, but that was the <em>real</em> reason Sephiroth’s tone, or treatment, or whatever, kept bothering him. He felt like a baby next to him. Some stupid child who couldn’t even work. Who had to be coddled. His stomach roiled, and he was so sick of the whole thing all of a sudden. Cloud gulped back more tears.</p><p>“You know what this is.” Sephiroth had to know. His things wouldn’t all be here, like this, if he didn’t know.</p><p>Sephiroth said nothing. He just turned, put the materia in the pants pocket, on the hanger, and shut the door, with that small, knowing smile on his face.</p><p>Cloud tried again.</p><p>“You <em>know</em> what this <em>is. </em>Right?” He tried to be firmer about it that time, but his voice quavered, and the roiling in his stomach spread, letting him know very fast that it wasn’t from anger. It was from fear. The smile wouldn’t leave Sephiroth’s face.</p><p>
  <em>Just like in Nibelheim.</em>
</p><p>“Oh, yes. Those are your things, Cloud.” Okay, well…<em>yeah</em>, they were. The quaking fear diffused from his body, a little, but that was more from Sephiroth giving such an obvious, non-committal answer than anything else. Yes, those were his things. That wasn’t the actual question, though.</p><p>“But…I didn’t have that materia in Nibelheim.”</p><p>Sephiroth said nothing. The calm smile didn’t leave his face, even then.</p><p>“…You <em>know</em> that. I didn’t have summons when we were in Nibelheim.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>He knew, apparently. He wasn’t even trying to hide it now.</p><p>It couldn’t be that the other memories were <em>fake</em>. That was the strangest part of it all. Both of these felt real. Cloud remembered falling into the Lifestream, and he remembered Sephiroth burning down Nibelheim just as clearly. Life with his husband versus life with his friends.</p><p>So which one was <em>true</em>? And why go to the trouble to hide one of them. If you were hiding something, that was always a bad sign, wasn’t it?</p><p>“Um…” Cloud couldn’t even look up at him. He had to gather up all the courage he could. Was Sephiroth waiting for him to actually say what he was thinking? And why?</p><p>“I don’t…” His voice couldn’t stop shaking, but he had to say it. If Sephiroth was hiding another life from him, all this time…if Aerith, and Tifa, and Barret of all people, wanted him to come back, he knew which life had to be the real one on principle. Even if he did like living here. Even if he loved it. Sephiroth being himself again, and in love with him! Cloud! Even if this felt real too, he couldn’t…</p><p>“I don’t think I should be here.”</p><p>When Cloud looked up again, Sephiroth actually frowned, but he clearly wasn’t angry. He tilted his head in mild confusion, but was still so calm. Was he expecting that answer or not?</p><p>“Oh? How come?”</p><p>Cloud couldn’t bring himself to say, at first. He tried, and his throat was choked up with tears. He took a deep breath and tried again.</p><p>“This isn’t…how it’s supposed to <em>be.</em>” As nice as this was…if Sephiroth was hiding something else. If he was, then he <em>knew</em> what was hidden was the <em>real</em> thing, the way things actually should have been. That’s what hiding implied. Cloud held up his hand, showing Sephiroth the wedding ring. “This isn’t how it’s supposed to be,” he said, quieter this time.</p><p>Sephiroth wasn’t angry, or even confused. He just smiled at Cloud again and gave a gentle laugh.</p><p>“Oh, Cloud,” he said, and Cloud expected him to dismiss that, or say that an episode was coming on, or whatever else, but instead, Sephiroth just said:</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>A very heavy silence filed into the room after he said that.</p><p>Cloud wasn’t even sure why that was so jarring. He figured he must have <em>known</em>. That’s why he was hiding all this in plain sight. But to just say that out loud, smiling. Like Cloud figuring this out wasn’t a problem.</p><p>“You….you know?”</p><p>“Oh, yes.” He said that so casually. What did that mean? What the <em>fuck</em> did that mean? Cloud had to run, but he couldn’t. He stood there, frozen and staring at his beautiful, perfect…<em>horrible</em> husband.</p><p>Why was Sephiroth just letting him figure this out? Why didn’t he care?</p><p>“S-so…”</p><p>“Shhh.” Sephiroth reached out and stroked his hair, and as soon as Cloud leaned into it, relishing the feeling, he instantly knew why Sephiroth was barely trying. Even if he figured everything out, what could he do about it? Sephiroth stepped closer, and as Cloud took in the scents of his soap and cologne, he could feel his mind dull. He didn’t care that Cloud knew because Cloud would never leave, even if given the chance. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t.</p><p>Why would he want to? He had the perfect life, with the perfect husband.</p><p>“I’ll take care of this, okay?” Cloud nodded and clung to him, sticking his face in Sephiroth’s shirt and breathing him in. His thoughts dulled further, then stopped, and he was in a calm, unthinking void, until Sephiroth let out a low, long whistle. The sound wormed its way into his mind, and it stayed there, filling and cradling him in a drowsy comfort. He sighed in relief and gazed at his precious husband. His soulmate.</p><p>He didn’t know that Sephiroth could do <em>that.</em> But then, Sephiroth could do anything.</p><p>Cloud looked at, no, Beheld him. Sephiroth’s smile was so gentle, and loving, and it was all for him.</p><p>“Is that better?” His voice embraced Cloud, and he nodded, flooded in absolute bliss. Yes, much better.</p><p>“Sit.”</p><p>Sephiroth didn’t even have to tug at his collar this time. Cloud didn’t obey his commands so much as <em>become</em> them, his body contorting on its own to sit on the floor while he gazed up at him in awe. Such was the power of his divine command. The tone continued to buzz in his mind, and the way it filled his heart with warmth was how he could feel Sephiroth’s infinite love for him.</p><p>
  <em>What the fuck are you DOING!?</em>
</p><p>But not even his love could drown out the tiny, fly-like buzzing of a voice in the back of his mind. Annoying. He hoped Sephiroth could get rid of it for good.</p><p>“Good.” Sephiroth’s praise and smile was his only reward, and it was the only one he needed. He was eternally grateful for Sephiroth’s grace and mercy. Always.</p><p>“Roll over.” Cloud’s body obeyed, and he rolled on the floor, over and over and over again. He wouldn’t stop until Sephiroth told him to. Such was his dedication, and the tone vibrated through him as a reward, filling his body with a euphoric, transcendent bliss.</p><p>
  <em>STOP! You can fight this! You HAVE to fight this! PLEASE!</em>
</p><p>“Stop.” Cloud stopped where he was, and he could feel Sephiroth gently pick him up and set him upright. It reminded him of how someone would handle a toy, or a doll.</p><p>He liked that idea. That image, of being Sephiroth’s plaything. A real, concrete purpose. Looked like they were starting their weekend early. How nice.</p><p>As Sephiroth sat down in his chair and pulled Cloud onto his lap, the tone eased up but never truly left. Cloud felt completely relaxed, his heart and mind at ease while he was in his husband’s lap. It felt like they were going to cuddle there, but Sephiroth grabbed his shoulders and had Cloud look at him. His perfect eyes, his thin nose and carved lips. He Beheld him, again, and he felt like he could do that for hours. For days.</p><p>The sound expanded in his head again. It pushed all other thoughts away, so he could be filled with new ones. Better ones. Sephiroth was fixing him, because he loved him so much.</p><p>
  <em>Please. I just want to go home.</em>
</p><p>But he <em>was </em>home.</p><p>Sephiroth smiled at him, and said, “Forget the closet.”</p><p>The command filled him. The sound became so loud that the annoying voice died, and as Cloud leaned in to kiss his husband, the study closet might as well have never been there in the first place.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sephiroth be like [activates Puppet Cloud like a deep state sleeper cell]</p><p>This isn't over. But we're almost done. As usual, leave a comment and let me know what you think, if you're able. Thanks!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Friday, Part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“I’m here to offer you a choice. You don’t have to take it. I just want to put it out there. Is that okay?”</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Friday, October 12<sup>th</sup>, 0007</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>7:00 AM</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Cloud woke up with a sudden awareness of an empty spot next to him. As he rolled over, he immediately saw why, even though it took awhile for his brain to catch up.</p><p>Sephiroth was already up and sitting on the edge of the bed. Even when Cloud rolled over, he didn’t look up or say “Good morning.” He just sat there, as still as a statue before saying anything.</p><p>“…Really.” It wasn’t to Cloud. It was too flat and cold to come out of Sephiroth’s mouth at all, let alone be directed at him, although hearing the…mild contempt embedded in that one word made Cloud freeze. His heart jumped into this throat and he lay there quietly, wondering if he had done something wrong. That couldn’t have been to him. He would never…</p><p>“G-Good morning.” Cloud’s greeting made Sephiroth jump a bit in surprise, then his shoulders visibly relaxed. He must not have known Cloud was awake. Without even turning around, Cloud could already tell that his expression lightened up immediately.</p><p>“Oh…good morning, Cloud.” His voice was light and gentle again, and Cloud sighed in relief, sitting up and giving him a hug from behind. Thank God. Looked like he was looking at his phone, although why that would make him so upset was beyond him.</p><p><em>Was</em> he upset? And why? That wasn’t like him, and at the phone of all things…</p><p>“You okay?” Cloud nuzzled his face into his husband’s neck, kissing him. Sephiroth was quiet for what seemed like a very long time before speaking up again.</p><p>“…Yes. Sorry.” He put his phone on the night stand and let Cloud continue with what he was doing. “…Cloud. What day is today?”</p><p>That made Cloud pause. He hung off of Sephiroth’s shoulders, having to think about that for a bit.</p><p>“It’s…Friday?” That didn’t feel quite right, but it had to be true. Yesterday was Thursday and today was Friday. Unless he lost an entire day. Oh God, he didn’t lose a whole day, did he? “It <em>is</em> Friday, right?”</p><p>“Hah, yes.” Sephiroth turned and swept Cloud into his arms, onto his lap, holding him tight. Ah, okay. Of course it was Friday. Thank God he didn’t black out a whole day. Sephiroth kissed his neck and Cloud relaxed right into his embrace.</p><p>“I thought it was Saturday. I guess I’m a little too excited, aren’t I?” He whispered into Cloud’s ear, making him squirm and his skin tingle. Ohh. Sephiroth must have been feeling really frisky this morning. Cloud had to get up and get everything ready for tomorrow, but as soon as he tried to stand up, Sephiroth pulled him back down. He stuck his hand down Cloud’s underwear, grabbing his cock and stroking him, slowly. Sephiroth kissed him all the way down his neck and Cloud automatically spread his legs for him, suddenly fine with staying in bed forever. Well, sex in the morning was fine, but they probably shouldn’t take too long. Sephiroth had to go to work.</p><p>Just as that thought left him, Sephiroth removed his hand, then leaned in and whispered, “Get your collar.” No matter how long this was going to take, Cloud leapt at the “command” first thing, stumbling all over himself while he made his way to the dresser, fumbling around in the top drawer before finally grabbing his collar. Instead of putting it on himself, though, Sephiroth walked over and plucked it out of his hand, delicately putting it around Cloud’s neck himself. The gentleness of the gesture made Cloud’s heart skip a beat, and he relaxed into him, leaning his back against Sephiroth’s chest.</p><p>“…I should get ready, you know, for-“</p><p>Sephiroth gave a powerful tug on the collar, and Cloud slipped back into that relaxed, open state of mind, ready to listen.</p><p>“You should relax today.” He could feel Sephiroth smiling, hear it in his voice. It was a rather strange, broad command, so Cloud didn’t understand what to do with it. He just let Sephiroth lead him back to bed, his head starting to swim from the endorphins already flooding him.</p><p>“You think? It’s your birthday tomorrow…”</p><p>“Are you questioning me?” The question’s tone was light, with no edge to it at all. Sephiroth could have passed it off as a joke, but even then, it made Cloud pause. It wasn’t fear. There wasn’t any reason to fear Sephiroth-</p><p>
  <em>Oh? There isn’t?</em>
</p><p>-but if this were an actual command, if this were “playtime”, he should still play along, It wasn’t even like it was harmful. It was just…broad. He didn’t know where to begin. After going so long without answering, Sephiroth chuckled and sat down, turning Cloud around to face him. He looked and sounded much lighter than a few minutes ago, and held both of Cloud’s hands in his. Of course. He wasn’t angry with him at all, and was always so patient…</p><p>“I get it. We need to warm up first, don’t we?”</p><p>Cloud nodded, and let Sephiroth take off his underwear, and he stood in front of him. Naked and erect and not feeling an ounce of shame. He was filled with a warm, sleepy feeling, like he was already in a warm bath. Sephiroth leaned forward, kissing his neck, then his chest. It was nice and all, but he was going so slow.</p><p>“…Are you sure? You’re gonna be late.”</p><p>“Heh. They can survive for a couple hours.” Oh, sure. Well, it wasn’t going to be his problem if they got mad. Cloud closed his eyes and stood there, letting his husband kiss him and stroke his cock, sighing. He sure was spoiled, wasn’t he?</p><p>
  <em>Like a pet.</em>
</p><p>Well, yeah. Not literally, but it wasn’t so bad to just stay home and do whatever. Cats got to eat and sleep as much as they wanted. They had to depend on someone else completely, but that was the tradeoff. They had to trust their humans, and Cloud trusted Sephiroth just as much. That’s how this worked. He was supposed to trust him.</p><p>Sephiroth gripped his cock while he reached into the nightstand drawer, probably getting the “treats”. Cloud could hear him open the drawer and feel him lean to the side a bit. Sephiroth stroked his tip with his thumb, making him moan and squirm. Yeah, this was the high life, wasn’t it? This was paradise. He’d take being spoiled like this any day of the week.</p><p>Cloud heard Sephiroth shake the bag of chocolates and opened his eyes, his mind narrowing in on the sound. Sephiroth was looking up at him, eyes filled with a soft glimmer. Admittedly, Sephiroth giving him looks like that all the time wasn’t…bad either. It still didn’t feel all that real, like he was fantasizing about it, but at this point, it didn’t matter. If Sephiroth looked at him like that, and felt like <em>that</em>, about him…well.</p><p>If he were dreaming, he’d rather never wake up. <em>If</em> he were dreaming, which he wasn’t. What would there be to wake up <em>to</em>?</p><p>Sephiroth reached up and looped his finger around the collar hook, pulling it to the front and tugging down. Cloud bent over, and even so close to the other man’s face, his eyes were so unfocused that he was seeing double. His <em>mind </em>was completely focused, though, and narrowed in on Sephiroth’s voice. He was painfully erect but that didn’t matter right now. Only Sephiroth.</p><p>“Give Daddy a kiss.”</p><p>Cloud leaned in and kissed him, as long as Sephiroth wanted. They comfortably explored each other’s mouths just like they did hundreds of times before. It never got old, and warmth spread through him as his husband’s tongue entered his mouth. He thought about trying to hump him, but he shouldn’t yet. Just a kiss. That was all he was getting until the next command. That’s how this worked.</p><p>Sephiroth pulled him off, gently, and offered a candied chocolate to Cloud, which he ate out of his hand.</p><p>“There’s my good boy.” As soon as he heard that and felt the fingers running through his hair, Cloud’s thoughts became less coherent. That was normal. The more they did this, the more his thoughts would slip until there was nothing left but to sit, or roll over, or relax his muscles, or suck Daddy’s cock. And it would continue for a little while, and then things would go back to normal. If they really got deep into it, Cloud would even get non-verbal, which was scary at first. It was like he forgot what words were, but at that point, he didn’t need them. Another thing about pets was that they didn’t talk.</p><p>Sephiroth tugged on his collar again and Cloud ready, listening.</p><p>“Lie down.”</p><p>Cloud lay down, flopping onto the bed and letting Sephiroth roll him onto his stomach. Sephiroth was always very careful with him, but being able to drift off and relax like this helped too. Sephiroth could even lift his hips into the air and make him stay like that, if he positioned his legs correctly. Face down, ass up. He took in the smell of the fabric softener from the sheets and by the time Sephiroth started lubing him up, it barely registered as anything except a pleasant fullness, then a building orgasm. Pleasure rocked him, pinging into his brain until he could barely think, until it barely felt like he even had a body. He was so spoiled. Even the soreness in his erection was starting to feel good.</p><p>Sephiroth pulled on Cloud’s collar again, and his mind focused, ready to listen. Cloud tried to say something but could only mumble an animalistic grunt into the sheets. He wasn’t even sure what he was going to say.</p><p>“Take a day off today,” Sephiroth whispered to him, leaning into his ear, and Cloud nodded, still face down. “You don’t need to do anything for me tomorrow. You’ve come so far…let me take care of you. Let me take you out.” He removed his finger and Cloud stayed where he was, taking in everything he said.</p><p>Take care of him…that sounded nice. Go out…if that’s what Sephiroth wanted. It was <em>his</em> day tomorrow, after all. Cloud nodded, suddenly free from the obligation that’s been nagging him all this time, that feeling of wanting to be good enough. Taken care of, by Sephiroth…</p><p>“If you stay home today and be good, I’ll take you out tomorrow. We’ll have dinner, go see a show…I’ll get to show you off. What do you think?”</p><p>Sephiroth entered him, making Cloud’s body vibrate all around him. Cloud could only moan and grunt in response, but it was still a “yes”. He could be good. He’d stay home today and be on Sephiroth’s arm tomorrow. Sephiroth penetrated him further, which made Cloud start thrusting into him and clenching around him. Every throb he felt from that cock was bliss, every careful thrust a new affirmation of love.</p><p>When his body was on fire and started curling, Sephiroth tugged at him, raising him up so he was kneeling on the bed and being hugged from behind as Sephiroth thrust into him faster. He liked being completely at Sephiroth’s mercy like this, but hearing his husband in his ear, breathing heavily and letting out loud, guttural moans…he relished in the idea of Sephiroth feeling the same way, which pushed him over the edge and made him come all over himself in spurts.</p><p>Cloud let himself be held like that, in a daze, above such foreign concepts like “pain”, while Sephiroth continued to fuck him. The faster he went, the louder he moaned and grunted in Cloud’s ear, until he could feel him buck and come inside him, the better Cloud felt. Somehow, it was proof was Sephiroth was just as excited to be here. He was never one to be very personal with anyone, so Sephiroth being just as excited about…well, everything, was the best part about all this. As Sephiroth dismounted, Cloud rolled over and presented himself, including the mess all over his stomach. His husband didn’t hesitate, leaning in to lick him clean, just as enthusiastically as he did months ago, when Cloud was first dipping his toes into the idea of marriage again.</p><p>He felt Sephiroth’s tongue on his stomach, then his cock. When Cloud started to doze, he felt Sephiroth sucking his cock, and came all over again but faster and in a much lazier way this time. He dozed for a little bit after that, only understanding that he had to relax and stay home today. Cloud felt like he did that more often than he should, but he wasn’t going to fight the idea of relaxing on purpose. How hard could it be to relax for one day?</p><p>After what felt like only a few minutes, Cloud heard the bathroom door open and opened his eyes. Sephiroth was walking out with one towel covering him and another one wrapping up his hair. Cloud yawned and looked down at himself stupidly, realizing that he was wrapped up in a blanket. Hmm. He must have done a lot more than just doze. The clock said it was 8:10…geez. Sephiroth had better not get in trouble for being late.</p><p>“Hey.” Sephiroth nudged him, then leaned in for a kiss. “Your turn.”</p><p>Nodding, Cloud got up and hobbled to the bathroom. He wasn’t <em>really </em>in pain, but his legs were still weak, so it was slow going for him.</p><p>As he glanced at the mirror, he had to stop and do a double take. Cloud ran his fingers through his hair, fanning out the strands to get a better look. Was his hair getting lighter? It was hard to tell…maybe he was already getting gray hairs. At twenty-one?</p><p>Weird. Must have been the lighting. Shrugging it off, Cloud wandered into the shower, starting his day like any other.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>3:16 PM</strong>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Cloud was busy taking in a book when there was a knock on the door.</p><p>Taking it easy had been a lot easier than he thought. Sephiroth even made breakfast again, and when Cloud remembered that he had to get a new notebook, Sephiroth offered to get one for him. He’d have to wait until after five to start writing everything down again, but taking a day to do nothing actually helped. There were only so many times he could write about what he was doing if it was just, “had a nap”, “had lunch”, or “started a new book”.</p><p>Too bad he couldn’t jot down that he had a visitor, but that was so rare, he’d definitely remember it for later.</p><p>The knocking started up again, followed by a pause, then the doorbell rang. Whoever it was, they seemed really insistent. Maybe it was Jessie? A neighbor? They never stopped by to visit before.</p><p>By the third knock, Cloud still didn’t move, which was odd. It wasn’t like he was scared or anything. It was just now hitting him how strange it was that no one ever came to visit. It wasn’t like he didn’t have any friends. Someone coming to visit was just…</p><p>Well, okay. The least he could do was get up and see who it was. Who knows…maybe it <em>was </em>Jessie and she just worked up the courage to actually come over. She was always complaining about only seeing him at work, so maybe she could put in the effort to come see him for once.</p><p>“Coming.” Snapping his book shut and tossing it aside, Cloud got up and walked over to the door, yawning. He didn’t even bother to check who it was through the peephole, mostly because it was probably Jessie anyway? He was assuming that at first, anyway.</p><p>But when he opened the door, someone very different was staring at him.</p><p>It was this girl, with long brown hair that was mostly up in a ponytail. His stomach twisted up and he had to look down, and his eyes settled on her boots. …What a strange combo with that dress. He tried to look up at whoever this was again, and noticed that she was carrying some kind of covered basket.</p><p>“Hey there!” It was such a friendly, familiar greeting, that he kept looking down, out of…embarrassment? Why? It wasn’t her fault, Cloud just felt himself suddenly turn an embarrassing shade of red and his stomach churn. Like she caught him in the middle of doing something embarrassing. But that didn’t make any sense. He was just…home.</p><p>Cloud tried to shake off the weirdness of it all so he could actually say something.</p><p>“Uh…hi.” When he finally looked her in the face, she was just standing there, smiling right at him. Like she was happy to see him? Just looking at her face made him want to squint, like he was looking at the sun. Or, maybe it was because he was looking outside. While he stood there, stunned by how strange this all was, the girl breezed inside like they were old friends.</p><p>“Wow…nice place. So this is how the other half lives, huh…” Other half…with her boots and jacket, it was becoming clear why that combination stood out. It looked thrown together. Like she thrifted from different outfits that she could find. It looked nice and all, but no one up here really dressed like that. It was suits or outfits or department store stuff. He squinted at her, which he didn’t have to do after she waltzed inside. Something about this, the way she kept talking to him…</p><p>“You’re…from, uh,” Cloud did a vague gesture, outside and down, since he didn’t want to come out and ask if she were from the slums. Partly because he didn’t want to be rude, but no one up here talked about the place. Like, at all? He knew that everyone knew about it, but they’d rather pretend the place didn’t exist.</p><p>“Yeah, the slums. Haha…” And here she came right out and said it. Not only that, but she looked at him and grinned, like she wasn’t even bothered by it. “Could you tell?”</p><p>“Yeah…” He <em>could</em>, and it wasn’t just because of the clothes either. There was something… “Uh, oh, I didn’t-” Cloud put his hands up because it hit him just then that maybe implying that he could tell that someone was “poor” would be rude? “Like, it’s not like I think you look-“</p><p>“What, poor?”</p><p>“No! You look, uh…great.” Nice. What a lame save. That made her laugh, but he got the feeling that she was laughing with him, not <em>at </em>him, so he couldn’t help but laugh along too.</p><p>“It’s okay. You’re right about me being poor.”</p><p>“Oh…” Cloud didn’t have much to say about that, so he could only look away and scratch his head. “…Sorry.”</p><p>“Don’t be sorry. “Poor” isn’t a dirty word, is it?”</p><p>“Ah…” He couldn’t argue that because…she <em>was</em> right. Cloud didn’t exactly grow up destitute, but no one in Nibelheim could be considered “rich” by Midgar standards. It was hard sometimes, but they made it work. No shame in that, but try telling that to people who lived on the plate. It always seemed like everyone here would rather die than get their clothes second-hand, or not waste food or electricity.</p><p>Ha, well, at least this girl would get it.</p><p>“Yeah, you’re right…” Nibelheim…he did miss it. Even if all the trees on the mountain had the life sucked out of them from the reactor, Cloud thought about the cool air, and the dirt under his feet, and the water tower. The one truck in town. The tension in his stomach was starting to leave.</p><p>“So…who-“ Cloud turned to look at the strange girl who entered his home and found her wandering into the kitchen, occasionally ooo-ing and ahh-ing at the setup. He followed after her, still a little confused but not exactly wanting her to just leave either. He wasn’t even that annoyed that she didn’t take off her shoes.</p><p>“What’s this?” She asked, pointing at a large, black appliance with a handle on the side.</p><p>“An air fryer.” Cloud automatically answered before changing the subject. “I’m sorry, who are you?”</p><p>The girl was quiet for a little while, staring out the window in silence. He almost thought he heard her sigh, but when she turned around, she was as chipper and unbothered as ever, still smiling.</p><p>“Oh, I’m a friend of Tifa’s.”</p><p>“Tifa!?” Seriously? Wow, what a small world. “Tifa Lockheart?”</p><p>“Uh huh. You’re Cloud, right?”</p><p>“…Yeah.” So Tifa really was in Midgar, huh? And she was talking about him? She remembered him, after all this time. He had to laugh at how that implication lifted such a huge weight from his shoulders. “Wow…how’s Tifa doing?”</p><p>“Pretty good…” The girl went back to the air fryer and started fiddling with it, pulling out the bottom compartment. “She’s got a bar down in Sector Seven and everything. It’s a pretty cool place. Oh, and she’s really into martial arts too.” Yeah, he did remember hearing about Tifa getting into that. While they were in the kitchen, Cloud took a seat because he might as well, and let the girl fiddle around while she talked. It was…good that Tifa was getting on well, even if she was in the slums. He could even picture the place, if it were Tifa’s: nice and cozy, but rustic too, with good food, a couple of arcade games, a jukebox…</p><p>“I’ll bet it’s nice. Wish I could stop by and visit.”</p><p>“What’s stopping you?”</p><p>The question hit so hard it felt like a slap in the face. When Cloud looked up at the girl, she wasn’t messing around with any of the appliances anymore. She was leaning against the counter, looking right at him. Now it was easier to tell why it was so hard to look at her before: when she looked at you, she looked <em>at </em>you. Not around or through or next to you. The question and her attention was on Cloud and no one else. It made him feel naked, like she could see things on him he wasn’t aware of before. Until she made it more obvious.</p><p>But it was familiar too, in a strange way. Like, yeah, that was totally a normal thing for her to do. He barely even thought about why that was the case.</p><p>“I…I dunno. It’s dumb.” He had to look away again and started pulling a bit on his hair, just to give himself something to fidget with. He didn’t want to admit that he…you know. That he was afraid that he’d wander off and never come back. He hasn’t had an Episode in months, still, but it could happen. It could all fall away in an instant at any time, so it was better to have it happen here than somewhere like the slums.</p><p>“I have…brain problems.” Cloud muttered that last bit into his hand so she couldn’t hear him.</p><p>“Hmm?” It did nothing to stop her, as she leaned in closer to listen.</p><p>“Brain…problems.”</p><p>“Oh, yeah? What kind?” Even then, that did not stop her from being aggressively unphased. Cloud could probably say that he killed a man and she would just go with it.</p><p>“Like, memory problems. I could go somewhere and then forget who I am, and couldn’t get back here.” When she was quiet, as if she were waiting for him to finish, he continued despite how he should feel embarrassed, but that wasn’t bubbling up in him at all. His heart was so calm and quiet, so he just came right out and said the rest.</p><p>“From mako poisoning.”</p><p>“Ohhhh. Right.” She nodded and looked out the window, as if thinking about this revelation. “You’re lucky. Most people don’t recover from that.”</p><p>“I know…”</p><p>“Hmm.” The girl sauntered over and leaned on the table, staring at Cloud as if she were studying him for some kind of test. “Sooo, that means your memory’s bad?”</p><p>Cloud nodded, looking away.</p><p>“Who told you that?”</p><p>…What kind of question was that?</p><p>“No one…told me, it just is.”</p><p>“Do you forget what you’re doing when you walk into a room?”</p><p>…No, actually, he didn’t. That’s never been a major problem for him, and as Cloud shook his head, something was starting to stir. It felt like someone strumming a guitar string, but in his brain, or the ripples after throwing a rock into still water. He’s…<em>never</em> forgotten what he was doing in the middle of doing it.</p><p>“Do yoooouuu remember stuff from your childhood?”</p><p>Cloud narrowed his eyes at her. Not in suspicion, but it <em>was </em>a little weird for her to go in this direction. He didn’t even know her name.</p><p>“Who are you, my therapist?”</p><p>She sighed. “Just humor me, okay?”</p><p>“Okay…yeah, I do.”</p><p>“In Nibelheim, right? With your mom and Tifa?” Geez, how much did Tifa tell her? If she was telling strangers his whole life story, he might actually have to go to Seventh Heaven to get her to stop.</p><p>“Yeah…pretty much everything.” The girl nodded at his answer, satisfied.</p><p>“All right! That’s pretty good. Let’s try something else.” She drummed the table for a bit before coming up with a new question. “What sector am I from?”</p><p>“…How am I supposed to know-“</p><p>
  <em>Sector five</em>
</p><p>Cloud stopped mid-sentence, a strange feeling settling in the pit of his stomach. He couldn’t tell if this feeling was good or bad, but his nerves were acting up. What…was that? That voice, the little voice inside him, it couldn’t be right, could it?</p><p>“…S-sector…five?”</p><p>“Yeah! All right, Cloud!” The girl held up her hand and, only after Cloud gently slapped her palm out of nowhere did he realize it was for a high five. He froze looking at his hand, unsure of what to do with this information.</p><p>“Okay, next question. What’s the name of Tifa’s bar?”</p><p>“…Seventh Heaven?” That was easy. Cloud definitely heard it in this conversation, so he could remember at least something from five minutes ago.</p><p>“How’d you know that?”</p><p>“You…told me.”</p><p>“I did?”</p><p>“Yeah, you…” as Cloud went through their conversation, it hit him that no, she didn’t tell him the name of Tifa’s bar. She just said that she had one. The name showed up in his head, all on its own. He was silent while he tried to puzzle out the meaning of this, but once again, the girl was unbothered.</p><p>“Well, either way, you’re right. Nice one! Okay, one more.” With a flourish, she set her basket on the counter and pulled something out of it. It was a flower, a yellow lily-like one, and she held it right up to his face.</p><p>“Recognize this?” He didn’t, but Cloud took it and</p><p>
  <em>“You don’t see that many flowers in Midgar.”</em>
</p><p>He. He did recognize it, maybe. Cloud sniffed at the flower and</p><p>
  <em>“Hey there!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sorry I missed your birthday. Happy 21<sup>st</sup>!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You should check-“</em>
</p><p>Cloud dropped the flower on the table and didn’t move. The girl stared back at him, her smile not leaving, but it was clear she was waiting for him to say something. She had such pretty green eyes… He was starting to hate that he couldn’t fully look at her, whether out of embarrassment or something else.</p><p>He looked down at the flower, again.</p><p>“…It’s yours. You grew them.” The girl’s house showed up in his mind unbidden. But how could he forget it? It stuck out like a gold coin in a pile of shit. Going to Aerith’s house for the first time was like stepping into a whole different world. It was like every living thing in Midgar wanted to be as close to her as possible. Her place was carpeted with flowers. Aerith’s house.</p><p>Aerith. This was…</p><p>Oh God.</p><p>“Yep…” Aerith must not have known how hard this was hitting him…no, she definitely did. She had to know, she was probably trying to sound calm on purpose. Cloud didn’t even have any other context for <em>how </em>he knew her…but everything was there. Even if it felt like it was buried under other things, impressions were there, like animal tracks in a forest. Something was <em>here.</em> He just didn’t know where to start digging. Aerith, for her part, seemed like she was satisfied.</p><p>“Well, your memory seems fine to me!” She sounded so light and happy, almost excited, and it made Cloud’s heart feel like it was being stabbed by a thousand tiny needles. Aerith had no reason to be proud of him. None.</p><p>“I’m sorry. I’m-“ This time, when Cloud tried to look her in the eye again, he couldn’t because his eyes were blurry with tears. He choked on his words, so he ended up saying nothing. He just sat there and cried in silence.</p><p>He failed her in so many ways. More than with just the cards, but with…so many ways that he wasn’t even fully aware of. He couldn’t even count them all. All because he was too weak…</p><p>“Hey!? Come on.” Aerith leaned over and patted his cheek to get his attention. Not only was Aerith here, but she was <em>real</em> too. And she had to see Cloud when he was like this. God, he was so pathetic.</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“…No.”</p><p>“Aha, well, I probably deserve that answer, huh?” That made him laugh a bit, and after he started to wipe the tears from his eyes, the shame (that’s what that feeling lurking inside him was, it was shame) dialed down a little. Right, what kind of answer was she expecting? By the time he fully calmed down, Aerith had moved to standing right in front of him. She didn’t say anything. Probably because she was waiting for him to go first. After awhile, in a sheepish tone of voice, Cloud finally spoke up.</p><p>“You…sent the cards, right?”</p><p>“Oh! You got them? I thought they got lost…”</p><p>Cloud looked at his hands, remembering how many of them he put in the shredder without even opening them, and tried to push that thought aside. Aerith didn’t pry about it, which was so like her.</p><p>“Uh, anyway yeah, I did. I didn’t know how to beat around the bush about it. Sorry!”</p><p>“About…what?” Cloud looked up at her, to see if he could guess at the answer from her expression, but Aerith could be really poker-faced when she wanted to be. She must not have expected that answer because she tilted her head at him in mild confusion.</p><p>“The, um….the closet?”</p><p>Silence. Cloud stared at her dead-eyed, trying to figure out what she was talking about, but couldn’t think of anything, so Aerith tried again.</p><p>“The closet? In your study? You know…”</p><p>…What?</p><p>The study didn’t have a closet, did it? Cloud tried to think of all the times he’s been in there, but couldn’t remember ever seeing anything like that in there. If there was one, it was probably removed through remodeling or something. He shook his head as an answer.</p><p>For once, Aerith didn’t seem to know what to say. Her mouth hung open as she thought about this, and she leaned back, her arms folded.</p><p>“Oh…<em>my God.</em>” She then whisked herself away to the study while muttering what sounded like, “That <em>fucking asshole!</em>” It took Cloud a couple of seconds before he got up and went after her, just in case she was about to do something they’d both regret.</p><p>Thankfully, Aerith was only standing in the middle of the study when he got there. She was staring at what looked like a wall next to the bookcase, but when Cloud tried to see what she was looking at…it was just a wall. He didn’t get what she was looking for, but Aerith was nodding, like she found whatever it was anyway.</p><p>“Oh…no look, it’s still here, see?” She pointed at the wall, but when Cloud looked again, it was just a wall. He turned and stared at her.</p><p>“What’s here?”</p><p>“The…ohhh, my God, you don’t see it? Here.” Aerith walked over to the wall and put her hand on something. As soon as she pulled, Cloud suddenly noticed the handle she was pulling on, then the door wiggling whenever she pulled. It looked locked or stuck so she couldn’t open it, but when she stepped back, he could see the closet door plain as day. It just looked like a wood paneled wall.</p><p>Cloud looked back at Aerith and suddenly felt very stupid.</p><p>“…How did I not know this was here?”</p><p>“Hey,” Aerith smiled at him in that way where she clearly knew something that he didn’t, but wasn’t telling for whatever reason. She <em>wanted</em> to, he knew that much about her. But something was holding her back. “It’s okay. It was pretty well hidden, to be fair. Kind of <em>lazy</em>, but still...”</p><p>“How did <em>you </em>know?” Cloud was more curious than suspicious, just because Aerith seemed to know everything. He remembered that about her too, at least.</p><p>“Hah, let’s just say a…uh, very large…planet-size bird told me?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Never mind. Look…” Aerith sighed and stepped in front of the closet and, for once, looked off to the side and started fidgeting her hands, like she was nervous. Then, she took a deep, shaky breath, and spoke.</p><p>“I’m here to offer you a choice. You don’t have to take it. I just want to put it out there. Is that okay?”</p><p>For once, she sounded dead serious, which got Cloud’s attention. He nodded. Yeah. They were friends, right? Even if he didn’t remember how, she at least knew Tifa, and him.</p><p>“Okay! Well…first, do you think the Planet can be saved?”</p><p>“…Uh. Like from Shinra?” Was she with AVALANCHE? That would make sense. He did vaguely remember Tifa being involved, but he didn’t remember where he learned that either. But Aerith shrugged at the question.</p><p>“Sure, but I mean more in general. What do you think?”</p><p>Cloud shrugged in return because he wasn’t sure. Maybe, in a vague “Save the Whales” kind of way, but stopping the Planet from dying seemed like a big ask.</p><p>“…Dunno. It would be great if it could be. You’d have to get everyone to stop depending on Shinra first, though.” He couldn’t really think of a way to get that going.</p><p>“…What if you <em>could</em> save the Planet? Like if you knew you could, would you do it?”</p><p>Well, that was an easy question. If he <em>knew</em> that it was possible, then of course he would.</p><p>“Yeah? If you knew you could, then who wouldn’t, right?”</p><p>“Right! Exactly. So…” Aerith took another deep breath. “This is going to sound very insane, but you need to humor me, okay?”</p><p>“O…kay?”</p><p>“What if what I’m saying to you…isn’t a hypothetical?”</p><p>The study was deathly quiet while Cloud tried to think about what this implied. Not hypothetical…like…</p><p>“You mean…you’re saying you <em>know</em> I can save the Planet-“</p><p>“<em>We</em> can. You, me, all of our friends. We can save it because-“</p><p>Aerith suddenly stopped, turning her head to the door and staying silent. Cloud was quiet too, only because the air in the room became taught like an overly tightened string. Aerith wasn’t even breathing. It was like she was listening to something out of Cloud’s range of hearing, like a dog whistle. She looked at the clock on the wall, which made Cloud follow her gaze. It was almost four. Her brow furrowed.</p><p>“Shit,” she muttered to herself before moving again, out of the study and towards the kitchen. “I gotta go!” she yelled over her shoulder. It took a few seconds before Cloud’s brain to catch up to what was happening and he followed her. Aerith was just starting to head out the back door by the time he caught up to her.</p><p>“Going? After all that?”</p><p>Aerith turned to face him, and ever since she showed up here, this was the first time that she actually looked harried. She stopped, but she kept looking at the front door the longer she stuck around.</p><p>“Yeah, I know. I don’t think I’m supposed to be here, so…you didn’t see me, okay?”</p><p>“Uh…you’re not exactly a Turk, you know-“ Aerith grabbed Cloud’s shoulders and gave him a pleading, desperate look.</p><p>“Please? I promise, it’ll all make sense when you open the closet door, okay?”</p><p>Cloud couldn’t say no to that. He nodded. It was so weird to see Aerith close to scared, so he couldn’t just rat her out.</p><p>“Say that you’ll promise. I wasn’t here.”</p><p>“I promise.”</p><p>Aerith hugged him and, because the gesture was so familiar to him, even now, Cloud hugged her back.</p><p>“Thank yoooouu. I promise I’ll come back, okay?” With that, she let go and dashed out the back door. It only took Cloud a few seconds to figure out what she was so scared of, why she had the sudden urge to leave, and who he shouldn’t tell about her visit because just then, he heard the front door open and froze.</p><p>
  <em>Shit.</em>
</p><p>Because she was talking about Sephiroth. Who else would she have been talking about?</p><p>“I’m home.” Cloud continued to stand there, near the laundry room entrance, not moving.</p><p>Aerith never actually brought Sephiroth up by name once. That was pretty smart of her. If she just came out and said, “Sephiroth is literally hiding things from you,” there’s no way he would have believed her. So she showed him instead. All this time, he didn’t even know about a closet in there, and yet, there it was.</p><p>
  <em>Yes you did.</em>
</p><p>Since when?</p><p>
  <em>Since the first time this happened.</em>
</p><p>…What?</p><p>“Cloud?”</p><p>Cloud almost jumped out of his skin, but he didn’t turn around. Whatever it took, he had to make his face calm down before Sephiroth saw it.</p><p>Even now, he knew for a fact that Aerith wasn’t scared of anything. But when she felt Sephiroth coming, she bolted. He didn’t want to think about what that could mean.</p><p>“Mmn, heeey. Hi.” Cloud still didn’t turn around, but he at least tried (and failed) to sound super casual. If it sounded weird, Sephiroth didn’t say so. He came into the kitchen and Cloud could hear him pull up a chair and still down.</p><p>“What’s up? …Everything okay?”</p><p>“…Yeah. Fine. You’re…home early.” It <em>was</em> an hour before he was supposed to be back, at least normally.</p><p>“Eh, it’s Friday. I’m allowed to slack off on my birthday weekend.”</p><p>“Right…” When Cloud turned around, he saw Sephiroth holding the flower that was left on the table and turned around again, covering his mouth so he wouldn’t let out a yelp.</p><p>
  <em>Shit! Goddammit!</em>
</p><p>“Where’d this come from?”</p><p>Okay, it wasn’t the end of the world. Just…take a deep breath and lie your ass off. Sephiroth wasn’t God or anything. Just say you didn’t know. As casually as he could, Cloud shrugged at the question, scratching the back of his head.</p><p>“Where’d what come from?” Cloud asked, as level as he could.</p><p>“The flower...”</p><p>Cloud shrugged again, dedicated to saying as little as possible. They were married, but he promised Aerith. It wasn’t like he was cheating. She must have been scared for a reason…and it was starting to rub off on him too. If he could get out of here and sneak into the study, then maybe…</p><p>“Dunno. It was there when I came in here.”</p><p>“…Yeah?”</p><p>Cloud turned to face him, having enough of this.</p><p>“Yeah. I couldn’t have gone out and found it because I didn’t leave. Remember?”</p><p>Sephiroth could only sit there and stare at him, expressionless. Cloud tried to look for any sign of that warmth, or that dreamy-eyed look Sephiroth would give him sometimes. But he couldn’t find it. Sephiroth’s eyes had grown cold, and they looked more like a wild animal’s than at any other time he’s been here. It was the slit pupils that did it. It made him look like he was coldly studying Cloud, like some kind of apex predator.</p><p>“Hmm.” Sephiroth looked down at the flower in his hand, and as if a switch were flipped, the warmth sprang back, and he laughed off the tension. Like none of it happened.</p><p>“Well, I was just wondering. How strange…” He set the flower down on the table and stood up, stretching. “Want me to order in?”</p><p>Cloud stood there, watching for any other sign of…whatever <em>that</em> was. When he couldn’t find it again, he sighed.</p><p>“…Sure.”</p><p>“Is pizza okay?”</p><p>Cloud nodded, and while he was getting kind of hungry, he was still determined to get into the study. If he was going to do it, it had to be while Sephiroth was on the phone. It had to be now.</p><p>Sephiroth gave him a small smile and ruffled his hair before reaching over to the phone. Okay, good. As soon as he started talking, Cloud slunk away to the study and slowly, making sure it didn’t squeak, closed the door. Just so he could hear Sephiroth coming.</p><p>He crept over to the closet, and it took a little while before he could even find the handle again, but after feeling around for the seams where the doors slid, his hand cupped into the handle perfectly. What a strange thing to hide. What was Sephiroth keeping in here? He couldn’t believe that he’s been living here this long and he didn’t know about this, in his own house.</p><p>Why? What was the point?</p><p>Aerith said that whatever was in here would explain everything. But explain what? And what did she mean by not being allowed to be here?</p><p>What did “here” mean, in that case? The house?</p><p>Cloud had to know. This kind of closet door didn’t have a lock on it on anything, but it <em>was</em> stuck. That wouldn’t be a problem for him because of his enhanced strength. Even if stuck, he could pull it open by force, easy.</p><p>As soon as Cloud tried to pull the handle, he heard the study door open. Shit! Sephiroth was already done? No way. Cloud took his hand off like he touched a hot stove and turned to the window, trying to look innocent.</p><p>“Cloud?”</p><p>“Hmm?” Nothing to see here! Cloud was just looking out the window, as you do.</p><p>“…What are you doing?” In response, Cloud stretched his arms over his head, yawning.</p><p>“Oh, you know…” He didn’t finish answering the question, and after a few seconds, Sephiroth spoke up again.</p><p>“Cloud. What are you doing here?” It wasn’t the exaggeratedly tough tone that he took when he was “disciplining” Cloud, but it wasn’t casual either. It had this strange…flat tone to it. Like Sephiroth sucked all the emotion out of it in order to sound neutral. It was…creepy. But Cloud wasn’t going to let that get to him. As soon as he turned around, he looked his husband dead in the eye. Sephiroth was holding the flower again and stared right back at him.</p><p>“This is my house, too,” Cloud said, trying to sound level too, but his voiced wavered. Sephiroth said nothing. His cold snake eyes were back and he continued to stare, unblinking. “…I mean it.” To prove it, Cloud stomped over to the closet and put his hand on the handle jiggling the door.</p><p>The corners of Sephiroth’s mouth turned up a bit. He actually blinked.</p><p>“Oh.” He twirled the flower in his hand by the stem, idly. “Interesting…” Sephiroth sauntered over and bent down to look Cloud in the eye, as if emphasizing how short Cloud was. That he could overpower him at any time. He looked at the door handle for a bit before turning his attention to Cloud again.</p><p>“…What do you think is in there…Cloud?”</p><p>If he was trying to intimidate Cloud, it wasn’t working. Cloud stood his ground and looked at Sephiroth in his weird, unblinking eyes.</p><p>“Something you’re hiding.”</p><p>“Hmm.”</p><p>“We’re supposed to trust each other, and you’re hiding things from me.”</p><p>“Hahaha…”</p><p>Cloud slammed his fist into the closet door with a loud bang. Sephiroth immediately stopped laughing, his face falling flat. Like a switch was flipped.</p><p>“Don’t fuck with me! I mean it! What are you hiding from me!?”</p><p>Sephiroth kept twirling the flower in his hand without even looking at it. For the moment, he couldn’t take his eyes off Cloud.</p><p>“They’re mementos. I’m only hiding them because you’re so stubborn. I can’t have my little bird flying away-“</p><p>“Shut up!”</p><p>“It’s for your own good.”</p><p>“<em>Fuck </em>you!” What an insulting thing to say. For his own good!? If what was in here could help him save the Planet, why did Sephiroth have to hide it? Didn’t he want to save the Planet too? Fuck this. With tears in his eyes, Cloud started to pull on the door handle.</p><p>“Oh, that’s enough of that.” With that, Sephiroth let out a low, soothing whistle, and Cloud’s arms instantly fell to his sides. The sound filled his mind and washed away the anger, the sadness, the betrayal, until he was all better. Yes, Sephiroth was right. This was for his own good.</p><p>In an instant, Cloud said, “I’m sorry,” and meant it with his whole heart. He wiped the tears away from his eyes and couldn’t remember why he was crying.</p><p>“It’s all right, Cloud. I forgive you.” With Sephiroth saying that, and that smile, Cloud’s heart was soothed. Yes. His divine grace could even forgive Cloud for doing something so terrible.</p><p>With that nasty business out of the way, Sephiroth held the flower in front of Cloud’s face.</p><p>“Where did this come from?”</p><p>“Aerith.” Cloud had no trouble answering him, even though he wasn’t sure if Sephiroth knew who she was.</p><p>“Aerith…here? She was here, physically?” Cloud nodded, but only one question came bubbling up to him, amidst the sound ringing through him.</p><p>“…You know her?”</p><p>Sephiroth didn’t answer at first. He kept messing with the flower in his hand for awhile before putting it in his shirt pocket.</p><p>“How did she get here?”</p><p>“…I don’t know.” She didn’t say. He figured she must have hitched a ride from out of the slums. Not that it mattered anymore.</p><p>“Well, she’s tricky. She’s trying to take you away from me, is what she’s doing.” Oh no! That wasn’t good at all! Why would anyone do that?</p><p>“You don’t want to leave.”</p><p>“I don’t want to leave.” Cloud felt compelled to say it, but he meant it too. He loved it here. He never wanted to leave.</p><p>“Good, that’s right.” Sephiroth leaned in and pet his hair, and Cloud could feel the sound reverberate through him, making him feel <em>good.</em> Sephiroth was back to his normal, loving self, and he never wanted that to stop, ever again.</p><p>“But, you did lie to me.”</p><p>“Yeah…”</p><p>“I’ll have to discipline you for that.” Cloud nodded in complete acceptance. He would take any punishment, if it was because of Sephiroth’s love. That meant he wanted to help him, make him better.</p><p>“Thank you for taking care of me, sir.”</p><p>“Of course.”</p><p>“I love you.”</p><p>Even if he couldn’t see his face, Cloud knew that made Sephiroth smile, and the thought of it made his heart overflow with joy.</p><p>“Love you, too.” With that, Cloud felt himself be pushed a little bit outside of his body. Even if it wasn’t a literal thing, that’s what it felt like. His arm moved up and down on its own, as if testing its own movement. Then, his head moved on its own, testing its movement from side to side, rolling the neck. Sephiroth didn’t even have to give verbal commands anymore.</p><p>Oh. Of course.</p><p>Cloud was a vessel, after all. This was his real purpose. Of course Sephiroth could use him as another body. That’s what vessels were for. To be filled! Some punishment!</p><p>Even when his body bent down and crouched on all fours to be a footstool, Cloud didn’t mind. Even when Sephiroth put his feet up on Cloud’s back while he caught up on his reading, he didn’t have a care in the world.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>[runs up to you] [tosses this in your general direction] [leaves]</p><p>anyway hmmm one more chapter!! if it takes awhile, I haven't abandoned this. school's just starting again and this time, I'll be at a literal full time job. whoa! incredible. so if I don't get the last chapter out before then, I'll work on it bit by bit.</p><p>enjoy!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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